11 Month Old Hitting - Georgetown,TX

Updated on November 26, 2008
K.B. asks from Round Rock, TX
11 answers

My 11 month old son has recently started hitting to get our attention. How can I discourage this behavior. It is not a hard slap, but I am worried that it may become more than just a playful hit.

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A.R.

answers from Houston on

What I did with all my kids was grab there hadn gently look them in the eye and say no!! This is not ok, please do not hit me or others. You should see the ole lip start to tremble and they usually cry because you told them to stop. Good Luck!I agree not to let it go on.

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E.A.

answers from Austin on

We recently started having the same issue with our daughter hitting and thinking it was funny.

We've been folding our 14 month old's arms over her chest/tummy and holding them still for the count of 5 when she hits. We also say 'no hitting' or 'we don't hit Mommy/Daddy" as we do this to let her know what it is that she's being corrected for.

She's very put off by us doing this and really wrestled against it at first. But, she sure doesn't hit for quite awhile afterward. We're down to very few incidents during the week. Now, it only happens sometimes when she's overly excited during play.

Hope this helps.

- E.

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V.B.

answers from Houston on

When he hits you (or anyone else), gently take both of his hands in yours and look directly into his face (on his level) and say "no hitting" or "we don't hit, that's not nice". You have to be consistent and use the same response EVERY time. It will probably take a little while, but he will get it. I usually recommend ignoring behaviors that you want to quash at this age (such as tantrums or screaming), but you can't ignore hitting because it will inevitably get worse and you can't chance that he will hurt another child. Good luck to you! This is just a phase, so it will pass, don't worry.

Updated comment - I read some of the other posts and I would also encourage baby sign language as one poster suggested. I taught it to my daughter starting at 7 months and she picked it up right away. I have started signing to my son also who just turned 6 months. They don't get quite so frustrated because they are able to "tell" you what they want/need to a certain extent. Anyway, I highly recommend trying it.

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J.K.

answers from Austin on

Dont make a big deal of it. Just tell him no no no, that is not nice. And give him an alternative way to get your attention. I dont know where he is with speaking but you can definately start teaching manners now. Good luck.

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M.C.

answers from Houston on

Hi K., I had the same issue with my son. I think that boys are just rougher by nature. I told my son, "no hitting, you have to be gentle with mommy (or whoever)" and I took his hand and gently brushed across my face so he would learn how to be gentle. I only did this when I knew he wasn't trying to hurt. I also told him it's not nice to hit. If he ever hits in anger or frustration I would tell him it's not nice to hit, put him down, walk away and completely ignore him for a minute or two. At this age he wants your (or dad's) attention more than anything else so if he loses your attention when he hits he should stop doing it (mostly). Goodluck!

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C.B.

answers from Austin on

My son does the same thing but it got worse and worse now he is 2. I took a class about discipline and this is what they had to say. This is an excerpt from a worksheet. "When toddlers hei other children or their parents they are often trying to inflict harm only to gain other people's understanding of their hurt, in other words they want compassion." This has helped us out and what I do with him is hold him, hug him so he can not hit,or hurt anyone and tell him I love him. Also listen to hear if he has anything to say to you. Hope this helps! Good Luck!

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K.S.

answers from College Station on

This happened to me around the same time with my daughter and she is now 15 months. For her it was when she was frustrated or mad and would hit or grab our faces. I would firmly say "no hitting" and take her hand and say "be gentle" and stroke or pet my face with her hand or wherever she hit. I then would take her hand and do it on her arm or somewhere so she could feel what "being gentle" felt like. She grew out of it for the most pare and really only does it when she is overly tired or doesn't feel well now. She even stops herself now which is really cute :) I think its really just a phase that most babies go through and will grow out of. Good luck!!

K. mommy to 15 month old Emma

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M.M.

answers from Austin on

My suggestion for you is to teach him some basic sign language. I had a home daycare for years, I have 5 children myself and I worked at the Texas School for the Deaf. I have seen the difference it makes to give children "words". You can get a book from your library that will show you baby signs and if you give him the ability to "tell" you what he wants, he (and you) will be much happier.
JMO
M.
in Texas

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J.H.

answers from Houston on

Since he is just trying to get your attention, when he does it, just take his hand in yours, very firmly, and tell him no. If you have to squeeze as little, do it, it won't hurt him but it will be uncomfortable enough for him to get the message. If that doesn't work, then just give his hand a light slap and say no. He young enough to break now but if you let him continue to get away with it, it will get worse.

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H.P.

answers from Houston on

You've got some good advice here. I'd like to add that it's a good idea not to let them hit you at all, whether they're laughing or crying when they do it. I was raised in an environment not to hit (especially my parents), even when playing. That's what I've used, and it works. They know that they've crossed the line when they take a swipe at me, and they aren't comfortable there.

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L.H.

answers from Killeen on

HI K.,,
Happy THanksgiving to you and your family.I think i'd try not to respond to him ,,tell him its not nice to hit ,,,Yes he is a bit young to understand,,or you could try slapping his hand not hard and tell him no to ask for mommy or daddy
GOOD luck L.

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