14 Teen Yr Old Girl Skipping School Etc....

Updated on January 26, 2010
J.B. asks from Irving, TX
5 answers

What to do about teen girl skipping school, and also suspect her getting high. I received a text from a friend of hers on her phone while i had it and it said" Hey you, Still High?" this was right after I had took her back to school the day she was skipping.. I hate this, at wits end.. what to do besides sit on top of her all the time!!!

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

My parents were very strict, too. I was constantly grounded despite being a good kid.

All the experts say that kids want their parents to set limitations and hold them accountable for breaking the rules. She's 14, you're the parent. Be firm in making and enforcing the rules. If she is getting high, who knows that it's from. Some things kids are doing today are really, really dangerous.

It may take an uncomfortable conversation, but you'll need to ask her and find out. I agree that her cell phone is a privilege, and should be taken away and monitored if it's abused.

Yes, we all do stupid things as kids, and I regret the rather benign things I did.....being too sheltered can have negative consequences, too, but in the end, it's our job as parents to make sure our kids are safe and on the right side of the law.

2 moms found this helpful

L.C.

answers from Kansas City on

sit on top of her. lol. I was not a bad child by any means, but i did stupid things. i think the majority of us skip school or try weed or alcohol and things like that because they are deemed "cool" by our peers. my mom was more strict then most of other parents in school, and when i was grounded, i was GROUNDED. no tv. no radio. nothing. just sitting in my room and lots of chores. i remember at the time hating it and feeling like she was so mean. but now that i have my own kids? i love back at it and i feel like i got away with too much! she may hate you for it now, but she will appreciate it later. Another thing that worked for me as a teenager, when i would get busted, my mom would have me choose my punishment. i was always concerned that if i didnt make it fair or tried to get out easy that she would punish me way worse, so i always gave myself something extreme enough and had no one to blame but myself!

2 moms found this helpful
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V.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Her phone is a privilege, not a right. Take it away and cancel it and whatever other “privileges” she has. My daughter got a phone not too long ago because of her straight A’s and other accomplishments. If she started acting irresponsibly and disrespectfully, I would take her phone away so fast she wouldn’t know what hit her. I’m so sorry you are going through this. That’s all the advice I have as I don’t have a teenager at home yet. Kudos to you for reaching out too!! If I go through this I know I will reach out to other Moms too.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.R.

answers from Dallas on

Hello J. and I am sorry you are going through this. I agree with the other moms take the phone away, I would also search her room I would take the door away (lack of trust), speak to the officer on campus and principal so they can keep an eye on her. It may seem like a little too much but it's not like when we were growing up these kids now days have more imagination and can get in serious trouble.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.H.

answers from Detroit on

Have you spoken directly with her? Don't forget, when we were kids... we said all types of things. I would not recommend you jump to conclusions and start to blame your daughter for something she may not be doing~ especially as you only have a text for your 'proof'.

Did you ever skip class? I know lots of kids did when I was a teen. It is sort of viewed as a 'right of passage' at that age.

Put yourself in her shoes. What changes have occurred in your home or in her life to cause anything drastic in her behavior? Not all parents realize that all kids at all age levels can stress out in their own way over the smallest event.

Sit down and have a heart to heart with her. I cannot express to you how many times I wish my mother did this with me as she went her way and forced me on my own way. It would have been nice to talk, and assure her of any issues she was worried about instead of being blamed for things I had no clue about.

1 mom found this helpful
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