19 Month Old Refuses to Let Us Brush Her Teeth

Sounds like you're doing all the right things! we have a similar issue, and the only thing that sometimes helps besides variations on what you do is for me to put my thumb lightly on her chin, use a mirror, and/or hand at her cheek.

Keep in mind, these teeth you are so worried about are temporary and if you're that concerned, a trip to the dentist 2x a year for a cleaning might be a good idea. Relax,
it is not the end of the world if she does not do the job as well as you...that is what learning is all about. Try a little praise, that goes a long way, tell her she's doing a great job!

Hi, Lisa. I sent you a message too. I actually want to respond about the comment re: the baby teeth being temporary. The far back baby teeth in a child have to remain in the mouth for close to ten years. This last baby tooth comes in at about 24 months, by the way, and the bottom ones come in before the top. Some children complain when you try and brush there around age two. Is it possible this sounds like your daughter? Also does anyone out there feel that children chewing on items prior to new teeth erupting is common? Anyway, the next tooth to come in is at age six behind that two year molar, and that one's an adult tooth. That tooth has to last a lifetime. I agree with the post about visiting a pediatric dentist. I took my girls around age two so they could have an early positive experience. Good luck! Enjoy your baby-the time flies before you know it!!

Thanks for writing this question. I have the same issue my 21 month old little girl. I've talked to some of my friends about it, and they all say the same thing...with time, the habit will become one that turns into productive brushing, instead of just sucking on the toothbrush. My little girl is pretty strong willed like her mommy and daddy, and I don't see any need to go into the drama of holding her down and crying, forming an obvious negative association with brushing. It's not as though she's never going to learn to brush. I finally learned to relax about it and still just keep doing the best that I can in hopes that one day she'll get the whole actual brushing thing or that she'll really let me get in there (this is an extremely rare occurence). Good luck!

Does your daughter like to sing, or when you sing to her? We sing the ABC's with my son twice when we brush- once on top and once on the bottom. The few times he tried to refuse, we did pin him down and do it anyway. Having Elmo, etc. on the toothbrush made a big difference to him at that age. All the other suggestions made are good too. I do like the electric brush idea. I bet that would work well!

Good luck,
T.
www.ReadandGrow.com

I developed a special tooth-brushing song, and for some reason this turned my toddler from a toothbrush resister to a fan of brushing. I imagine this wouldn't work for every kid, but it might be worth a try.

We use to have that issue, now she just sucks the toothpaste off of the toothbrush. After talking to our peditrician, she said to get an electric toothbrush, b/c it is fun for them, then she also "reminded me" that this is to help create a good habit later on in life, baby teeth fall out eventually, it is the habit now that will protect their adult teeth later in life. The doc also recommended seeing a pedaitric dentist before she is 3yrs old, ideally 2, but we are past that age. My daughter seems to do better when mom and dad are brushing her teeth with her, so we all are brushing more than our twice a day, but at least we'll have clean teeth!

Good Luck, ages and phases!
J. W. MPH
Maternal and Child Health Educator

My daughter let me brush her teeth with no problems until she turned about 14 months. Then it was a fight. And she would chew on the toothbrush or suck off the water also. One day my other daughter left her battery operated toothbrush on the sink and she got hold of it. She loves it. She does it herself first and then lets me. True I do not get as well as I do for myself but I figure something is better than nothing. I am still teaching her that it is very important to brush teeth. I once read a comment from a dentist that her son would fight it as well and she figured that he would not suffer horribly by not doing a thorough job every night. With my older kids, I had the same problem though no battery operated brushes until they were 4 or so. I have them drink water in the evening and at night. No juice or milk. None have had cavities and they are 10. The only time I really push the battle is when we go to a party or other occassion with lots of sweets.

We sing scales of vowel sounds and our 21 month-old lets me get in there for about 15 seconds. We prioritize a different set of teeth each brushing!

For our daughter, once she was a bit older, we told her about sugar bugs and how we had to get them out of her mouth so her teeth would be healthy. Until she was 4 she would brush and then ask us to look in her mouth to make sure they were all gone.

Hi Lisa!
I wish I had some advice for you, but I actaully have a question instead. I have a 19 month old daughter as well, and she usually lets me brush her teeth, no problem. I have noticed, however, that when she's getting ready to/ has just started cutting a tooth, she reacts to teeth brushing the same way your daughter does. So... I was wondering how long she's been reacting this way? Could it be possible that you actually brushing her teeth is painful right now and her version of chewing on the toothbrush is soothing to her gums? If that's the case, hopefully things will get easier when she's done teething. Just a thought.... Good luck and enjoy your little one! :-)

I honestly don't see teeth brushing as an area to cause conflict over. I have let my daughter brush her own teeth, twice a day, since she was around 16 months (she's now 19) and while she sucks on it more than brushes, I figure the most important part is the cultivation of habit. She also gives up the toothbrush after a few minutes. She will let me do a quick scrub before taking the toothbrush away, but I'm not doing anywhere near a good enough job.

I decided that that's OK for now. How about backing off completely, letting her do it herself but with a short time limit?

The idea of singing a quick song while you brush her teeth is a good one. Since she likes to chew away on the toothbrush, tell her she can do that as long as she likes after you brush during the song. If you make it a quick, happy song, it will be long enough for you to get in there decently and short enough to keep her happy. Once you are done, the brush is all hers.

My daughter was the same way. If she'll happily chew away, she is getting some benefit, even if it is not proper teeth brushing.
We brush our teeth together. I brush, she chomps. When I'm done, I ask her if I can finish. Some days she lets me, some days she doesn't. I don't think this is an area where the battle is worth it, especially if she will happily chew the tooth brush. She will eventually learn how to do it properly.

How about mostly letting her brush her teeth and then rewarding her in some way for letting you brush her teeth? Maybe she will then get used to you brushing her teeth and you can phase out the reward. The reward could be anything from her getting to do something she likes to giving her something (example a sticker to wear) or whatever you think she would like.

I wouldn't choose this one to do "battle" over. Gently encourage her over the months to do a little more actual brushing while the toothbrush is in her mouth. take her to the dentist on schedule and unless there are any problems don't worry about it.

We bought our daughter a small electic toothbrush when she was around your daughter's age (They have Disney Princess ones that my daughter just LOVED! Have her pick one out herself. I highly recommend the ones by Oral B). We also had so much trouble with her wanting to brush her own teeth. With the electric toothbrush, it made it seem more like a "game" and being curious with the buzzing sound on how it worked, she let me brush her teeth almost every night!

I like the battery brush idea. Or have her pick out one from the store. Have her pick out special toothpaste too. Really get her involved while all along she will think she's independent! Also, try brushing when she doesn't expect it. Maybe while your reading a bedtime story, while she's taking a bath. Catch her off guard. My son is 3 1/2 and is just now letting us help.

You are the mom and you need to put your foot down and tell her she needs to let you brush her teeth after she has finished. Our son always brushed first and then he would say Ok time to finish. Usually he asked his Dad.
Check with the local library in your area and ask if they have a video that you could watch together about brushing teeth or as your dentist.

Good Luck,
S.

I've been brushing J's teeth since he was around 4 months & it was just gums...

So I was totally caught by surprise when this stage started in our house...

What I found that worked, was I gave him a tooth brush & I had one. I let him chew on his, then I'd say - can mommy brush your teeth & he'd pull his brush out & start playing with it...

Thankfully, since I've started brushing them while he's on the potty - he is back to having no issue with me doing them again...