K.M.
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New York
on
I would say try to limit or eliminate his nap.
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Hi mamas,
I have 2 boys, age 2 and 5. We're having sleep issues: the 5 year old sleeps like a charm, 8 PM to 7 AM and will sleep through almost anything. The 2 year old has always been restless (often literally). His preferred sleep schedule would be 9:30 PM to 9:30 AM, but nursery school starts at 9:30, so we get him up at 8:30 AM. He naps about 2 hours in the afternoon, from 2-4.
My problem is that when he can't sleep, he just can't sleep. If one of us holds him or try to lie down with him, he thinks it's playtime. (If I pretend to fall asleep, he pokes at my eyes and giggles -- wake up, mommy!) Otherwise, we just have to let him scream. He wakes up at 11:30 each night (always has, from 6 months on) and requires adult intervention - turn a CD on, change a wet diaper, get a snack or a new crib toy, give a kiss; and he often goes back to sleep quickly. But some nights it's like last night - woke at 11:30 and screamed until 4:30, even with us trying everything we could for 2 hours then letting him cry it out. His brother will sleep through anything, but this morning we were all just toast. Any ideas out there?
I think we're going to see what happens if we eliminate his nap, and add in either a walk after dinner or have more running-around time (out of doors - for my own sanity!) Thanks for the ideas! (And more thoughts are always welcome!)
I would say try to limit or eliminate his nap.
Does your 2 year old have any other issues? Any developmental delays? My kids stopped naps at 2 years old.
How active are his days? My kids at that age needed to go outside after dinner and burn off energy even in the winter. Also how conducive is sleep for him in his room? Is it cooler at night, are his feet covered, are there too many toys around? Also what is the routine before bed? My oldest has trouble sleeping and we have gone through different things to help get to sleep and stay asleep. I give sleepy time or chamomile herbal tea before bed and have tried different homeopathic remedies. Sometimes too we have wakeful nights it is hard but parenting can be very hard some days. For her her mind is always on go mode so to wind down and be sleepy can difficult. The other thing is how is his hearing,breathing? If you suspect anything a little out of wack then get it checked out. Good Luck
J.
I wonder if he is overtired and can't soothe himself. My son is 4.5 and we still have to sit in his room until he is asleep or nearly asleep (I read a book by book light after his stories are done). Once he is asleep he is a sound sleeper but he doesn't nap and gets overtired and hyper easily. Also it takes him a while to wind down and get to sleep, probably and hour on average for the whole bed time routine. My almost 2 year old is also on a different schedule and will go to bed and wake up later if I let her.
I also think you need his nap to be earlier or shorter or both. Exercise after the nap may help too. We don't always get outside after nap time so we got a mini trampoline (to save my sanity the winter my son was 2).
There are some good sleep books out there but I don't have a recommendation. One did say to make sure kids get no caffeine if there are sleep problems (hopefully not an issue for a 2 year old). It can be in so many things like chocolate, soda, etc.
We have a similar problem, but we have to be out of the house by 7:15 a.m. My daughter is 2.5 and has NEVER slept well. She still wakes 2-8 times a night. We have done EVERYTHING. I mean, EVERYTHING - she also thinks it's playtime when we lay down with her. She was endangering herself in her bedroom last week - opened all the dresser drawers, poured water on her head, unplugged stuff, tore something off the wall including nails, took apart the child safety locks, etc. My son is 3.5. He does not sleep through everything, but mostly he's a great sleeper and he doesn't really nap anymore.
We limited my daughter's naps to 1 hour and have her woken before 2pm at school. This has helped with bedtime - she gives up and goes to sleep earlier. We also have removed everything from her room except a mattress on the floor. (she was climbing out of the crib so those days are over) It's blacked out, no nightlight, there's a gate on her door so she can't get out. No toys or books, just her lovey. We still have to endure up to 2.5 hours of drama at bedtime. When we leave her to her own devices (crying, playing, whatever) it can be 11:30 or midnight before she gives up. She snores, has sleep apnea, and is extremely irritable during the day. So I KNOW she needs more sleep. We're waiting for a sleep clinic in October and a visit to the ENT next week to look at her tonsils/adenoids.
So, you could try limiting naps or moving them earlier in the day. Start bedtime earlier (we start at 6pm so she'll be asleep by 8:30). Check whether he's snoring. Enforce that we sleep at bedtime - try not to engage at all (when we're called in the middle of the night, we solve the problem without looking her in the eye, talking to her, or engaging her). Try going for a walk before you start bedtime. Let him see that his brother is a good boy about going to bed. Offer choices but stick with the decision once it's made (do you want this blanket or that blanket?). Remind your son that you're in charge and you know what's best for him. And remember that your other son is watching/learning too (my kids play a game that is really humiliating to me - where my daughter lays on the floor "in bed" and my son runs into the room and screams at her that it's bedtime and she has to be quiet). If you find something that works, please let me know. I'm out of ideas here!
