3 Year Old Boy Is Scared to Go Number 2 and Gets Constipated

My mom use to give me "freezer candy". It was actually diced dried apricots, prunes and golden raisins that she would keep in a Tupperware container in the freezer. They don't really get hard since the water's no longer in them but they do firm up a bit. Any way I couldn't get enough of it as a kid (I felt like I was getting away with something since I wasn't allowed to have much real candy.)

I hope this helps.

Talk to your pediatrician. We are having this problem with my daughter and she put us on a regimen to help her poop regularly. It involved using suppositories 1xday for 3 days, then half dose of Miralax that we will give her for 3 months, decreasing amount by 10% a week. Then benefiber and stuff like that. But I wouldn't suggest you do it until you talk to your pediatrician. We just potty trained my daughter about 2 weeks ago and she started holding out the pooping. Her doctor said it's better to get her regular now, otherwise it will become a habit for her and we will have trouble with it forever.
Good luck!

Hi R.,

My just-turned-three-year old is experiencing the same thing. He has been going pee in the potty for a couple of months, but after spending an agonizing hour and a half with him in the bathroom to go poop one time, I decided to lay off that part. So for a couple of months, I was content with him being pee potty trained. He would either ask for a pull-up or I would put him in a diaper when it was time to nap, and that is usually when he would poop. Now, however, we have begun cutting out naptime, and he is in his underwear all day. This has prompted some success with going poop in the potty. The first two days were horrible - screaming and crying for about 45 minutes before he finally allowed himself to poop. After that, it seemed to get better. Then we had about a week where he seemed to hold it until nighttime, when he had a diaper on. The past couple of days, we have been back to using the potty. I second all of the others who have mentioned the different foods to offer (and not offer). I have been paying more attention to fiber content now, as I do not want it to be painful for him. One more thing - I tried all kinds of ways to make potty time fun (books, videos, sticker charts), and it seems when he was truly ready, we didn't need all that stuff. I wish you lots of luck.

Hi R.

Try not to worry.. My son was the same way... went number right away and then.. was afraid to go # 2.... oh he'd have accident after accident in his pants and we'd sit him on the pot.. but eventually.. he became less fearful of it.. we tried not to put too much pressure on him and didn't make a big deal of it.. gradually, one day.. he decided to sit and go.. and we thought YAY!! we are there and then he stopped for a little.. then again, he went.. and seemed a little more comfortable with it.. basically, we were just patient. and IF we saw him straining and looked like he was holding it in, we'd gently suggest , do you have to go and rush him over to the potty.. it took awhile. the best advice I can give to you is.. be patient. if he is going # 1.. he will evntually go #2..

R.
I totally understand your frustration and concern for your son. My daughter 3 in Feb. often refuses to go #2 at all -potty or diaper - and believe me you do not want to get to that point. They get these ideas stuck in there heads and it's so hard to convince them otherwise. If he is ok with doing his duty in a diaper go ahead and give him that option just to keep him regular. Even if he goes in a diaper in the bathroom next to the potty. He knows what is expected of him, he'll get there in his time. If we were talking about a 10 year old well then... maybe not. As far as foods go - mix flax seed oil or aloe juice in his yogurt or apple sauce when he's backed up - smooth release. Stay away from too much dairy and sugar. Lots of fruits, veggies (even if it's the same one over and over b/c he's picky). Don't forget water. Hope this helps. Good Luck

I had that problem too. My son is 3 and 8 months now, he also was potty train when he turned 3. He was scared of the potty for a long time. I just kept at it asking him every hour or so if he needed to go, yes or no we just went. I had to hug him while he was going. There would be days that he would sit there for hours. When he did finally go I would give tell him he gets to go to Target and get a HotWheel. That was his thing, he loves cars. Just give him something he really want when he goes #2. It worked with my son, maybe with yours. Regarding the constipation I would give him a little laxitive not the recommended a third of it. I just try to stay away from cheese and bannanas when he gets constipated.

Hi R., you should trust your "mamma gut." With that in mind, you might want to check out the book; The Out-Of-Sync Child by Carol Stock Kranowitz. It talks about kids with sensory processing difficulties and you may find that your little guy has some sensory sensitivities (I am thinking of him being a picky eater and having difficulties with BMs).

Make sure he's eating lots of fruit to make it easier. When my older one had this problem (as did a friend of mine with her son), we tried everything from buying smaller toilet seats, padded seats, to returning to a potty chair. What worked was sitting there with them and reading a book and (the old standby) a reward system. I gave my son a sticker each time and it he had a certain number we went to the toy store for a small prize (set a price limit!). After a couple of weeks he was more comfortable about it and we no longer needed the prizes. Good luck. Also, I remember being in your shoes, I knew all books by heart, songs, videos, and could tell you every Pokemon name and what they morphed into (all three levels)!. However, it was worth it. I spent a lot of time at the park and talking to other moms, making play dates with kids they met, or formed playgroups and had moms bring potluck breakfast foods or lunch (each mom took turns with their house). Eventually when they hit kindergarten you meet moms at school and it gets a lot easier. Have fun with them while they are little.

Hi R.,
I had this same problem with my daughter now 8. I had her drink lots of O.J. before going to the bathroom. Then I discovered Shaklee's Kids MealShakes, they have lots of fiber in them to help cleanse their tummies plus the vitamins they need. I also added Shaklee Vitamin C...to replace the O.J.'s
Learn more at www.shaklee.net/natural_family_products
Good Luck!