3 Year Old Still in Crib - Elkridge,MD

Updated on April 25, 2013
M.W. asks from Elkridge, MD
22 answers

My 3 year old daughter seems uninterested in moving from her crib to her big girl bed. We set up her twin bed in her room and told her that whenever she was ready we'd move her from her crib to sleep in her bed, but each night we ask her where she wants to sleep tonight, she always wants the crib! Is this normal for her age? She never tries to climb out, even in he mornings when I know she is awake, she just waits for myself or daddy to go get her... She actually cries hard if we try putting her down in her bed at night... We even try watching movies where little girls are sleeping in their "big girl beds" and she mentions what big girls they are and that she'll try it "tomorrow" but it never happens.... Will she ever want out of her crib or will we have to force it?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

If she is three she will need to get to the potty if need be, so unless you can take the side rail off the crib staying in the crib will be a problem. If you can take the side off so she is able to get to the washroom without having to climb over the rail I would let her stay as long as she fits. Otherwise just take it apart and put it away.

2 moms found this helpful

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

The crib is her safe haven. Don't push her out yet if you don't have to.

I would have loved to have had that problem! I wasn't ready for any of my babies to transition to the big girl/boy beds. I kept my youngest in the crib the longest. He was 3 1/4 before I moved him out. If he'd wanted to stay in, I'd have kept him in until he didn't fit anymore! I hated to see that crib go!

2 moms found this helpful

More Answers

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

If it ain't broken, don't fix it.

My first son slept in his crib until he was nearly 4. He LOVED it.

My middle son climbed out of his at 20 months, but I needed him to stay in it since I had a newborn coming, so I put a crib tent on it. When the crib tent broke several months later, I had to transfer him to a toddler bed, and it was very hard to keep him in bed.

My 3rd son just turned 2 and hasn't tried climbing out yet. I am dreading the day that he does and I have to switch him, because he really sleeps beautifully in it.

All this is to say that unless you need her crib for a new baby, or she is climbing out, let her stay in it. It is a safe and comfortable place for her.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I guess I'm in the camp of I don't see the big deal. My 1st child decided to move to the toddler bed right when he turned 3. My second was three in Feb and he's still in the crib. Like your daughter, he's not interested in moving. He is a great sleeper, and I just don't see any reason to mess with that. A toddler bed is the same exact mattress as the crib mattress, and kids sleep in those until they are 5. So it's not like it's too small.

(That said, I don't really think he'll want to be in the crib until he's 5. At some point, he's going to get more interested in being 'a big kid'.) I'm in no hurry.

ADDED: Oh, and BTW, he's completely potty trained, day and night, and it didn't interfere with that at all. That was true of my first child too - he potty trained, day and night, for about 6 months before he moved out of the crib.

4 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.N.

answers from Los Angeles on

I know it sounds harsh, but get rid of the crib-cold turkey. If she has a choice, she will go with what's comfortable. If she only has a choice between the floor and the bed, the bed may look like a great choice. Let her pick out her own bedding, maybe buy a new pillow, so that she has some input with her new bed. We have 2 boys and never had that issue since once the younger one came along, the older had to move to a big boy bed. Good luck

3 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

I'm with Amber -- see her post. As long as the crib is there she is going to choose that because it's what's familiar and comfortable. And while I usually would always say, "The kid's young, let her have her comfort object," this is a fundamental safety issue to me. If this is one where you have the side off so it's open on one side, that's fine, but if she is in it all night with the sides up--she's going to have problems when she does climb out. And she will.

She has not climbed out -- yet. Some night soon she's going to want to come to you in the night, or she's going to decide she wants to get something in the room, and she's going to climb. No matter how much you tell her to stay put, no matter how much she says "I'll stay here mommy," she's eventually going to climb. Well....Go look at the crib. Picture her falling from the top of the raised rail to the floor. That's quite a distance for a kid-- especially if she falls head first. My friend's kid broke her arm the very first time she tried to climb out.

Truly, going cold turkey now is not going to scar her for life; she will not remember it. If you handle the transition to the toddler bed well -- stay in the room the first few nights or even weeks, for instance, which will help her, and once you leave the room, be calm about silently walking her back to her new bed (over and over and over if needed) when she wanders out of it -- then it'll be OK. If those things scare or bother you, be aware that eventually you'll have to go through this transition and establish these new routines with her; why put it off?

I would not whisk the crib away so it's missing when she comes home one afternoon from playing; I might treat it like people do pacifiers and tell her that it's going tomorrow to some child who really needs it. Maybe she can help carry the parts to the car while you talk about the baby who's going to have it -- and then immediately take your daughter to the store to pick out fantastic new sheets and a bedspread etc. for the toddler bed (even if she already has some). Those first few nights will be tough but she will survive them and so will you. Don't be afraid to stay with her until she's asleep at first -- despite what some moms say, it does not mean she will expect you in her room when she's 10. You can gradually leave her half-awake and eventually tuck her in and leave, but if you are removing the comfort crib, yeah, you'll have to do some work for a while.

And as someone else noted -- if she is in a crib with the sides up, you can't be potty training for nighttime yet. You don't want her to have to transition on two major changes at the same time -- moving to the toddler bed AND being expected to try night training. If you move her to the bed now, you can do the nighttime training later, but if you wait on moving her to the bed, the two changes might be too close together and that's a recipe for problems with both bedtiime and pottying.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.S.

answers from Washington DC on

There's really no reason for her not to continue sleeping in the crib if she's comfortable there. At a certain point, she may be too heavy for you to lift over the rail, and it may be problematic that she can't take herself to the bathroom when she wakes up in the morning.

You might ease the transition by taking the rail off of her crib so that it has just the three sides and she can climb in and out on her own. She'll still be in her familiar crib, but she won't need to be lifted, and won't be stuck... she may also be willing try the big girl bed (if that really is a priority) if it seems like she can climb back into her crib if she need to.

HTH
T.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.M.

answers from Boston on

My son switched when he was 3 1/2 and there was no choice. He had one of those convertible cribs (crib/toddler bed to fullsize). He got to pick out his new mattress at the store (ok he had a choice of 2), he got to pick out his bedding, and when the mattress was delivered, it went from crib to fullsize bed and that was it...and he was fine with it....he had a book about his big boy bed from the library prior to this... Good luck

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Do you read to her in the big girl bed at night time? Maybe you could make that a special place where she has her bed time story, and then let her become drowsy and fall asleep? In my opinion, I wouldn't be in a hurry. Mine climbed out at 17 months and never went back to the crib. I'm a little jealous of you, lol! Like everything else, she'll let you know when she's ready. Totally understand your frustration, but I see nothing wrong with leaving things the way they are for awhile. Good luck! Mine also wakes constantly every single night and marches right into my room to wake me up, so count your blessings. :) Hugs.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I don't think it matters that much, it's really not worth having a battle over. There was one mom here that had her 5 year old in the crib....I can't imagine that you're doing any sort of potty training with this one since she can't get to the potty if she needed to go.

I think that I'd do some movie time or something like that in her bed and just lay their together and snuggle. She needs to see that it's a comfortable safe place to be.

I think that you could make a plan to work on putting her down for naps in the bed and just lay there with her until she falls asleep then get up or take a nap with her. If you can get her comfortable taking her naps in the big bed she'll soon be able to lay down at bedtime too.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son was probably almost four before we switched to a toddler bed. Now, we had a drop side crib. If we had a fixed side crib we would have switched way earlier - when it got hard to lift him out. We also would have switched if he needed to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. He potty trained at 25 months. Fortunately for us the kid has an iron bladder. He never climbed out of his crib and never seemed interested in a toddler bed. But he had no difficulty at all changing.

1 mom found this helpful

P.M.

answers from Indianapolis on

I'm the odd one out on this question. Neither one of my girls have ever slept in a crib. Ever. I hate cribs. They are dangerous and not worth it. I used a pack n play until they were old enough to sleep on an air mattress. Both of them moved out of the pack n play before 1. Now they are 2 1/2 and 1 1/2 and share an air mattress. I don't have to worry about them falling. And they can get up whenever they like. They often sleep on the floor too. Here in a few months we're moving. When that happens we're switching them to twin beds. They are used to sleeping together, and I used to co-sleep so it's comforting for them to be together.

My point : Your child doesn't need a crib. Taking it away won't traumatize her. A 3 year old should have their own bed and should be learning how to keep it neat. That's my opinion.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

O.O.

answers from Kansas City on

You know what they say: if it ain't broke, don't fix it!
Leave her where she's most comfortable.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.P.

answers from Miami on

When it becomes uncomfortable, she'll switch. If she's still in there in Kindergarten, then fight the battle!

My pediatrician recommended leaving our son in his crib as long as it remained "safe", meaning that he wasn't trying to climb out. We moved him into a toddler bed (his crib converted) just before his 3rd birthday because he was trying to get out each morning for about two weeks. If he hadn't tried, we would have left him there!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.K.

answers from New York on

She is comfortable, so let her be. When she is ready she will let you know.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.A.

answers from New York on

My son (who is 3) has to go into a big boy bed because he has a younger sister on they way who is going to have to use the crib. I mean, if really didn't want to move i would buy a new crib, but he was totally insistent on moving. So now since I am pregnant with his younger sister he is very excited to give her his old bed. But every one is different. She will move eventually. But don't try to force it, she could get so scared and be crying for her crib if you do it to early. Just wait until she is ready.

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Consider yourself lucky!
Don't push.
My son was 2 1/2 when we put him in a big bed - but we only moved him because we needed the crib for his baby sister who was arriving soon.
I would have left him in his crib forever!
LBC

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Yes, she will eventually want out of her crib and into her "big girl bed".
Don't force it if she doesn't try to get out of her crib.
It's her comfort & she will when she is ready.
I quickly figured out to "roll WITH my child's readiness: to change stages
and never once did I have a problem.
Don't go by anyone else's mode for stages. Read your child's cues & go
by those. You won't go wrong.
If she's not escaping, she's just fine & if you go with that......you won't have big dilemna's or fights.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.N.

answers from Denver on

Why worry about it? Be thankful she isn't climbing out-its her "safe place".
Don't rush them to grow up too fast!

D.S.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi, M.:

Don't worry, she is still a baby.

Let her be.

Good luck.
D.

P.W.

answers from Dallas on

She must feel safe in the crib. Does the new bed have side rails? If no, perhaps those would make her feel more secure.

I would gently just keep working on it. Not push too hard. Last resort do something to the crib so that it looks broken and uncomfortable to sleep in. Maybe that would help convince her to try the bed.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.O.

answers from Detroit on

what is the big deal. ??? I guarantee you she will not sleep in a crib at 12. don't you love your bed.. better than a new strange bed??

we set up my daughters bed and left the crib set up in case she still wanted it... but she moved easily to the new bed when she was 3 1/2..

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions