30 Weeks Pregnant of My Second One and Willing to Divorce. Need Advices!!

Hi S.. I'm very sorry to hear about your problem! It's good that you're going to a therapist for you, and I suggest that you keep doing that. What you need right now is to not be in such a stressful situation that it causes a problem for you or your baby. I would suggest talking about this with your OB/GYN doctor at your next visit. Have you told your husband that you can't take this situation anymore? Maybe he is just really stressed out about the new baby and doesn't know how to articulate it? I know it's hard, but you need to talk to the people you know. Especially if you plan to leave and don't have family nearby. That being said, it would be so hard to leave at that late stage in pregnancy and not have help with your older child as well. How is your husband toward your son? Is he a good father?
I will pray for you and hope that everything works out with not only your marriage but your new baby!

My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry you are not able to be relaxed and enjoy your pregnancy and prepare for the birth of your new child. Please try to stay calm-- stress is hard on you and the baby. It's very difficult to have a baby alone, especially since you may not have family here. But remember that even if you leave your husband, you will have to interact with him for many years to come, for your children's sake, and it will b e bad if he stays angry and won't talk, so you might as well start to try to open up communication again. Can you try again to get your husband to go to counseling? Many men resist the idea at first. Sometimes men respond better to a male counselor; maybe the person you saw can recommend a male therapist. Or if you have a religious or spiritual community, maybe you can find a counselor there (minister, priest, rabbi?). It does sound like possibly he is worried and stressed too, but blaming you won't help. Try also to talk with your friends; you may be surprised that they also have their problems. Good luck to you!

Even if your husband will not go to counseling, you can go. Your therapist can help you find the right thing to do for yourself and your children. You don't deserve to be treated badly and can make the changes you need. Just please do find a therapist you can talk with so you are not alone with these feelings. Take care of yourself, C.

Oh S., I am so sorry you are living through such a painful time when you should be rejoicing the new baby on the way. There is no excuse or justification for your husband to treat you badly and with such disrespect. You are not only his wife but the mother of his child(ren). What I can tell you is that since you are a stay at home mom, he may be feeling some financial pressure with the new baby on the way. Money is the primary reason most couples have problems and Kids are a close second. Therefore considering our current economy, and a new baby on the way, he was most likely hit with a one-two punch. I am the primary breadwinner in my family and found it very stressful to look forward to the birth of our fisrt child without slightly considering the financial burden I would face once she arrived. Now that I am in the middle of it, it isn't so bad. I have heard many stories of couples who nearly break up during pregnancy but this is NOT the time to decide on the future of your relationship, you are hormonal and he is not able to grasp the reality because the baby is not born yet. It sucks that men can't see the forest for the trees, but such is life. Once the baby is born he will most likely change. You did not mention he was horrible with your son, so I am sure he is great and loves him very much and his heart will welcome the new baby once the baby is in his arms. Please think back to why you fell in love with your husband and try to only focus on the positive things. You need to be as relaxed as possible especially in these last few weeks of your pregnancy. 1:you don't want to resent him should any complications arise and 2:you will never get these weeks back so make the best of them. Also, should there be complications such and an ealry birth or a complicated delivery, he may not handle that well and that is when you would really need him the most. So PLEASE relax and make the best each day and rejoice in the time he is away at work! As far as being intimate, this is the one thing he can hold over you so please don't let it get to you and focus on being a wonderful mommy and not a wife. I hope things get better for you and you will be in my prayers! Take care.