4 Year Old STILL Not Potty Trained! UGH!!!

I agree with taking away pull ups. Also, I would tell day are to have him try every 20 minutes to get him to sit on potty. Eventually increase the time. But it will remind him to try and it will also make him want to go when he has to so because then he can get up and go back to playing. Also. If he has an accident with peeing I would pay no attn to it, just Hans him new clothes and tell him to go change. We did that with my daughter at three when she regressed. When she had to change with noone paying attn she it the idea. If school doesn't help with this then talk to the director or find a new one. You need their support. Good luck

His school or daycare should be working with him like he was at home. Neither of my boys would be potty trained if someone wasn't doing it when I was at work. So I'd get with those people and get on the same plan.

Check with hsi doctor...is there some reason why he can't go?

All 3 of my kids were different in what worked with them. My daughter just did it on her own. My oldest son needed stickers - so he would get them when he went and have them taken away when he had an accident. My youngest picked a big Buzz Lightyear toy and we put that on the big table by the TV...he got to look at him until he went and had to put him away when he had an accident. He even took Buzz to daycare.

It will be something different for your son also...maybe just take a few days off and do the bootcamp with him? And is he a new 4?

Get rid of the pull-ups!!!!!!! Put him in underwear full time, no matter what. Pull-ups are diapers and he knows that. As long as he is wearing them, he will continue to go in them. You will have a messy 1, 2, or even 3 weeks, but he will learn. My worst potty trainer was 3 years, 7 months and we almost didn't make our deadline for preschool. But, eventually, he caught on that peeing/pooping in his underwear was gross and uncomfortable and he started using the potty. Good luck!

I'm not usually one to recommend drastic solutions, but have you thought of putting him in underwear, letting him pee/poop in said underwear, and NOT helping him out with a change of clothes? He may be okay with the feeling for the first minute or two, but it'll get increasingly unpleasant for him. If you do this, though, be sure not use shaming or angry language with him. (Doesn't sound like you would -- you seem really patient and nice.) Just say, with a sympathetic tone, "Yes, poop can feel pretty yucky. Next time just go in the potty, okay?"

No wonder he won't do it. You are offering him money and cookies, he thinks it is a game and you are letting him know he has an option, or that he can choose to do this or not. Why give him the choice? At 4, he knows when he has to go. Take the week off if you must. Put him in big boy cloth training pants with waterproof outer layer or plastic pants. Take him to the toilet every hour. Do not ask if he has to or wants to, simply take him. Do this all through his waking hours, and if you go anywhere.. Stop treating toilet training like a game, and treat using the toilet as a rule, expected behavior for a child his age. Do the expected behavior, or face a consequence just as he would for any other infraction of the rules. He is not a toddler. Tell him point blank, "You are more than old enough to use the grownup toilet and wear underwear. The rule is that you will do that. If you pee or poop in your underwear, there will be a punishment." Then follow through.
I had a friend whose son was nearly four and still not trained. She finally cured him by hiring a cool college guy babysitter. The little boy did NOT want the cool dude to think he was a baby and have to change his diaper. He started using the toilet.

L.,
Don't MAKE him do anything. (read my back posts if you can get to them). Read other posts on this subject too.

Making anything of the situation - discipline, punishment - is not going to help him in the long run.

he's not embarrassed by being wet - which is actually GOOD - and not being bribed well is a GOOD thing also.

Don't make him do anything.

Ask him. Once. If he doesn't, simply resign yourself to changing the sheets. AT least you will have one less argument ahead of you. THAT is a good thing in and of itself.

Give him a couple of months in diapers to sort himself out. Don't make an issue of the topic. Just let HIM sort it out.

Good luck, and read read read, as much as you can...
M.

my son 3.5 sill is bucking the poop prt of training. One thing I did to help with the skids was to insert "Poop pads" into his diaper. I just buy the thin panyliners and make a T in his undies using 2 of them. I found that I am less frustrated with the mess and he doesnt feel as bad. Other than that I am getting to the frustrated mark with my son. To make matters worse he has been holding in his poop for so long that they finally gave me an xray and guess up? Hes full of poo and now has to take an adult dose of miralax every day (2 weeks ago and is still emptying strong) So hopefully in a couple weeks we can be done with this and then bye bye diapers. In the mean time I bought some paints and solid type boxer briefs and we had a paint your pants day. He loves prancing around the house showing off his artwork!
Make sure your on the same page as your childcare provider, they are their to help you and make sure to be on the same page as you. Good Luck!!

When my 3.11 year old was still doing #2 in his pants, I had to bite the bullet and just take away the pull ups. I was giving them to him to do is business then he'd come to me, we'd clean up and go on with day.
It was not helping him in the long run even though it was easier for me.
I eventually just had to stock up on underpants and he would skid them (sorry - gross) about three times a day thinking he was going to get a pull up. Lasted for about two months (I wish it was only 3 weeks!). Eventually, he got it and now one year later he is successful and knows it (he even talks about kids in his class at school who still poo in their pants and says, remember when I did that?! it's gross.)
Give yourself time - time - time and be patient - OH if it is poo that he is holding my pedi told me to give son mineral oil to keep him from being able to hold it in and get constipated. . .
Good luck!

With our three year old, but it looks like you live where it is cold, we would tell him the ants are thirsty in the grass outside and get him to go potty outside, I know that sounds tacky, but whatever would work, we did, have you tried a potty chart with stickers? I would continue him in the underwear, and get him out of the pullups but at night when he is sleeping. We also did the ignore method, we would focusing so much attention on him going potty at one point that he was using that as a control thing against us, so we backed off and stopped talking about it etc, and he started going better, try not to put too much pressure on them.