My son, Antonio, is turning 4 next month and wants to have his party at The Bouncy Place. Since that means we will invite his entire preschool class (22 kids), I'm not sure how to handle gifts... I don't want him getting 22 gifts (that seems a bit excessive), but I can't see having the party and him getting no gifts. I think opening presents is a huge part of the birthday fun.
Any ideas how to handle this? I look forward to hearing advice! :^)
Thanks to all the great feedback I received on Mamasource, we decided to have a smaller party for Antonio...we had the party at the gym where Antonio takes lessons. Five of his friends, and his big sister, came and everyone had a great time. It turned out to be just the right number of kids for a fabulous 4th birthday celebration!
Maybe note on the invitation that half the toys he receives will be donated to the needy or Children's hospital.
I share this with you. I have four kids so if mine got 22 gifts every time I had a birthday party for one of them...I'd run out of space! (Not to mention my kids just don't need all that. Just this week, I found a toy from Christmas that was still unopened for my youngest daughter - I gave it to her this week and she loved it. So they don't need to use it all immediately.
However, if people ask for gift ideas, I point this out to them, and suggest consumables. Maybe a movie ticket, or a favourite candy or a gift certificate for a personal pizza? If this seems too weird, then I suggest books are alwasy welcome (can never have too many books!) or art supplies, caryons, colouring books, paintbrushes etc.
Good luck!
I don't know maturity level of your son, but you could put a note on the invitations that a gift that keeps giving would be awesome. By that I mean, if everyone were to give your son a copy of their favorite book, then he in turn could donate that book, their gift to a reading program or Children's Medical Center, who makes them available for to children who are patients at the hospital. He gets the thrill of opening all those presents and then the lesson of giving to some place that helps others.
T. - Kids love birthday parties... They love everything involved - cake, candles, games/playing, gift giving and receiving. My twins had their party at a bounce place last year, where we invited close to 30 kids. Out of the 30 invited, we had around 20 attend. Like you, I was worried that the children would be overwhelmed with gifts. It didn't happen. Many of the gifts were modest tokens of friendship (some from the dollar store)..... Nobody "over bought" - It was great and I'd do it all over again. Plus, those bounce places make it so easy on the parents :-)
If you really don't want to do the gift thing here is an idea that we considered and may still do.
On your invitations write something like: Antonio's birthday wish. This year, instead of birthday gifts, Antonio would like to donate new childrens books to the Ronald McDonald House. If you would like to contribute to Antonio's birthday wish, please bring a copy of your child's favorite book to the party. Thank you for making this wish come true.
Talk to Antoio before doing this. Make sure it's ok with him and make sure he understands what a wonderful gift he will be giving to so many needy or sick children. Involve him in the packaging and delivering of the books.
Of course, if you have a different charity in mind, you can change the wording.
Hope this helps.
Hiya T., heres an idea. I did this with my daughter when she was three because I too had the entire preschool there and felt the same way you do. Talk with your son and have him pick a theme, whatever he is into this month :-)
Then have each child attending bring a small item within that theme so that all of the items become a large play set. For example, my daughter wanted a kitchen. So I creatively asked each child to bring a kitchen type toy that is under $7 or so. We got all kinds of cool things and after the party she was ready to go with an entire set. I of course bought the big kitchen set and then her friends brought fake food itmes, someone brought a broom and dust pan, someone brought a iron and ironing board, someone a tea set, get the picture?
I hope this helps you out!!!!!! Take care and God Bless!!!
- Mom of 4 daughters 7, 12, 13, 14 (yikes)
How about you and your son chose a children's non-profit organization that everyone could bring a gift to donate to.
Have him open family presents at home the morning of his party or on his actual birthday with family only. That is what we usaully do.
Right off the top of my head I thought you could insert a little letter into the invite that explains your dilema and includes a request something like: if your name ends A-J please bring a toy. He likes blank, blank, or blank. If your name ends in K-P please bring a gift card from McDonalds, Fred Meyer or Toys R Us. If your name ends Q-Z please bring a craft type item. I agree with you that 22 random gifts would be a lot, but you're also right that to young kids the exciting part about a birthday is the gifts. Anyway, I hope my idea helps or at least helps you think of something else! Good look & have fun!!
Chances are, only about half of the kids will actually show up, and you can make sure that you note that they must rsvp on the invite so you know how many to expect. That makes it only about 10 gifts, which isn't as much. When rsvp'ing most mom's will ask you what Antonio likes, so be open about not wanting anything to big, expensive, etc.
As for the gifts, it will be fun and hard for the kids to see the gifts being opened, but most do a little party bag for everyone so it is easier to handle. Since he will be getting so many gifts, after the party let him pick out a couple to play with and the other ones you could rotate (that's what I do for all the kids toys, that way they have 'new' toys all the time)
Just a suggestion ... if the parents of the other preschoolers ask "What would Antonio like for a gift?," suggest that a couple of kids go in on a group gift. If you have each preschooler gives $5, a group of 4 could get one nicer $20 gift rather than 4 gifts that each child might say, "But Mom, I want to get him that ($20) toy!" When your child opens the gift, he'll know it came for "Tommy, and George, and Katie, and Annie." Ideally, your son gets fewer gifts from all of his friends, and the parents didn't have to spend more than $5 or so.
As a former Early Childhood Parent Education Instructor, my recommendation would be to think seriously about inviting 22 kids to his party. There's a lot of marketing and pressure on parents to have big parties for young children, but that is not always in the child's best interest. A good rule of thumb is to invite the number of kids +1 of the birthday he's having, which would mean 4 or 5 kids. Not only would that be more manageable for you and him gift-wise, but also would probably be more meaningful to him to have a few of his favorite friends rather than the whole class.
The other thing to consider is setting precedent and expectations about future birthday parties. There is the danger that you may end up trying to match or outdo each year's party, with less and less appreciation from him if it's what he's learned to expect. For a great resource on the topic of setting limits in families, check out "How Much Is Enough?" by Jean Clarke, Connie Dawson, and David Bredehoft. It's researched based information on how different kinds of overindulgence harms kids and families--Even when we are well-meaning and do it out of love for our kids. And remember that good parenting is often a "counter cultural" activity these days. You may not win a popularity contest, but your son will be the winner in the long run. Best wishes!
Not all 22 kids he invites will come to his party plan for that many but only expect half to show up so that will only be ten or twelve presents he is going to get. If all 22 kids show up and give gifts sit your son down with the gifts and ask him which gifts is he willing to give to a child that has no toys or presents let him pick out the ones he would like to donate. or another thing is in his existing toys help him go through them and the ones he doesnt play with give to charity so that you arent really adding toys you are replacing them.
