5.5 Yr Old Not Listening - Help!

Hi K., I would say to make it clear ahead of time what the punishment is going to be way before the action and the emotions kick in. This is what I did. I told my daughter one day that I have new rules. I sat down and explained to her that my job as a mommy is to make sure she grows up to be a respectful law abiding adult and that I love her too much to let her continue this behavior of etc.....from now on when you act sassy or throw tantrums like a baby then you will sit in time out like one. I wouldnt threaten to take away things in the middle of the behavior because it sounds like he is already struggling with emotions and self control and this will just make it worse. Sometimes its just a battle of the wills and you will just have to battle through it with him in time out. I would also mention that I had to take a look at my tone and how I was speaking to see if she was not copying me....Look at his habbits is he picking up attitude from tv, friends, music, video games, etc. Most importantly dont forget to reward his positive behavior with stickers earning up to a trip to the "treasure box" or whatever. He is not to old for this and may be filling like attention of any kind is good right now with a newborn. Lastly a consistent schedule is important he has experienced a lot of change so bed time, bath and dinner schedules etc should be the same as much as possible.

My son could not stay quiet for 30 seconds even if his life depended on it! that was so frustrating! it gets better. however, do have a conversation with him and tell him that whenever he gets a punishment his only answer should be... Yes Ma'm or Yes Sir and no more. after punishment is over, then maybe you'll talk about it. I still have to remind my kids that all they're supposed to say is Yes Mom. and no more. it's gotten easier. I just keep asking them "what is it that you're supposed to say?" do not answer to whatever else he's saying. I hope that helps. good luck and hang in there! ~C.~

My daughter (same age) occasionally does the same thing. I make sure that I am checking myself and am not too emotional when I dole out the punishment. Like another reply, my daughter knows the consequences already and will frequently catch herself and say,"ooops, I guess this means no kid shows". Usually, any acting out behaviors on her part is due to the fact that I am too wrapped up in work, younger sister etc. to give her the attention she deserves. So after a meltdown, I make sure that the punishment is paired with some extra time with me. Not a special activity but time to read or talk or do chores together or whatever. That usually gets us both back on track. Also, wait until your child is calm and talking rationally about the behavior before talking about punishment. For immediate extinguishing, I usually use time out or room time or whatever just to get her to calm down. If she needs to throw a fit, that's fine, its just not going to happen where I have to see it. That way she is just getting her anger out and not manipulating me. Its not perfect and we do have our moments of yelling and anguish but when I am doing it right, it works out ok. I hope this is helpful.

My son has similar meltdowns. It has gotten better but you can't let him talk back to you. I tell my son if he doesn't watch his mouth his mouth will be punished. One drop of liquid dish soap does the trick. I do let him have some water afterward but the flavor sticks around. The next time he starts mouthing off, I ask if he wants some soap...and he never does. Also, read James Dobson's book The Strong Willed Child. I read it only to find out that my mother in law read the first release when my husband was young...yippee I'm reaping his seed! Ha ha! Hang in there, if you remain strong and enforce your rules it will work. He's testing his boundaries.