Hi Moms! I always get such great advice on here, so I have another question. My daughter recently started throwing screaming fits when she doesn't get what she wants (usually me) immediately. This morning, for instance, she woke up, saw me in the room, and started screaming at the top of her lungs because I didn't immediately pick her up. My husband was holding her, but she wasn't having it (I was trying to get dressed for work). As soon as I picked her up, she was fine (smiling and all!). This just start 3 days ago. I'm thinking it may be separation anxiety, hunger, teething, or fatigue, but I don't know because she has never acted like this before when either situation applied. She's in day care full time, and always does great when I drop her off.
Has anyone else been through this? I believe she's too young to be "spoiled" with attention. Do any of your fellow moms have any advice? I would truly appreciate it. Thank you!
You're right, she's too young to be "spoiled" by attention.
Sounds like a phase. The other moms can give their advice on it.
Your post made me laugh, because my oldest daughter (a redhead with a redheaded temperament) did exactly that starting at around 8 months - she threw tantrums! I always thought kids started that at 2 years old, but no - some kids just know what they want, when they want it, at a very young age. I think at this age it is fine to hold them and cuddle with them as much as you are able - as it is also fine not to always pick her up, if you're not able (such as when you're getting dressed for work). You will discover that your daughter will probably become more opinionated as the months progress. Just pick your battles, and enjoy your baby!
Like some of the other moms who have responded, I too have a "spirited" little girl! She is 16 months and has also thrown these "temper tantrums" about things her whole life. If you look at the bright side, I think our daughters are going to be strong, independent women based on their personalities :-). It can be so hard and frustrating though. I find that sometimes it helps to give her attention for a couple of minutes and get her interested in something and then I can finish getting ready for work. Other times she is onto my plan, and she won't let me walk away. That is when I ask my husband to take her into another room and distract her. He is great at this, and she usually gets over the fussiness until she sees me again! I do think it's just that they miss us, but of course we know there's a balance between the time we can give them in the morning and getting ready for work. My daughter never had separation anxiety at day care until about a month ago- where the same thing happens- she only wants me to hold her and cries when I leave. BUT, she is totally fine as soon as I leave the room. It is actually important for them developmentally to experience separation anxiety and to learn that you will always come back for them. Good luck with your spirited one- she may be a future CEO or world leader :-).
My oldest son was like that but he was like that from birth. I remember he would cry even at a month old if anyone else held him. I think that some kids are just more klingy. My second was not quite as bad but he was still very attached to me and both would cry if I didn't hold them or if I left them at that age. They slowly would allow other people in the family watch them for short periods and by 2 they would stay just fine in sunday school. Now they are 5 and 3 and barely even say bye to me when they go to school very indepedent and secure with themselves which is great but now sometimes I miss when they would want me. so it is a phase and she just needs security that you will be there for her. I think that you are doing a great job letting your husband hold her when you need to do something and talk to her let her know what you are doing and why and pick her up when you can, she will learn and cry less while she is waiting.
C.
Around this age babies start to realize that when you are not in her direct sight you still exist. They then can start wanting things even when they don't see them. It could be part of that develop. My mother in law told me to expect that children would go through phases of only wanting one parent and our family has had its moments with our son. Perfectly normal!
It absolutely sounds like separation anxiety. It is a phase and will pass. What I suggest is that you make it into a game, like hide and seek or peek a boo from a distance. This way she'll get reassurance that you are still there but doing your own thing.
Good luck!
Sounds normal My 10 1/2 month od went through this. I bet your daughter missess you during the day and when she see's you wants only you. She is defiantley too young to be spoiled or be intentionally doing this. She knows she wants you and she has no other way to let you know this. It will pass, but with you being gone all day, she sees you and just wants her mommy. Be patient it will pass, don't get upset with her. Good luck
She's normal! It is probably separation anxiety and finding her voice. As she starts to learn to talking the volume will come down. For now, reassure her and talk softly. You are right about not being able to spoil a baby. I gave my boys lots of attention, wore them when possible, and if that didn't work, blew a breeze in their face. I didn't blow hard in their face, nothing like that, just a tiny puff to let them feel my breath. Somehow it seemed to calm them down. Good luck!
you're right - separation anxiety
don't spoil her at any age - it will just get worse.
there's no such thing as spoiling a baby with attention!!!
These are not temper tanturms. It is completely normal for an infant - which she is until she walks or turns a year - to be desparate from their mommy. Around 6-9 months a child learns they are separate from their mothers and it can be very stressful. This is a time to keep her secure and pick her up when she needs it and hold her tight. She is not being manipulative at this age...she is being honest with her wants.
If it gets frustrating put her in a sling and wear her on your back - I did that for a while and he was very happy to just be close to me (I thought he'd be bored...but he wasn't).
