Advice on Getting a Baby to Sleep Through the Night

I might cut it to one feeding in the middle of the night first. Put her down b/n 7-8 then when she wakes (somewhere b/n 12-2am) feed her and then put her down until morning. I would use a paci if she will take it and have a regular nighttime routine. Does she have a lovey or bear she can snuggle up with to fall back to sleep in the middle of the night. I would also let her play in the morning when she wakes up so she is increasingly comfortable being in the crib alone. Then once all this is settled, you can retry ferber- we went in every ten minutes, laid my daughter back down and left again (she was about 6 months). It took only a few nights and despite what people say, it was totally worth it. Good luck!

I'm a 35yr old mother of 3 older children now-8,10,and almost 12. I nursed/breasfed all 3 and it was wonderful but can be tiring. I always had to nurse them often-b/c it seemed I could just produce enough milk for them. Babies go through growth spurts and especially with the breastfeeding- they need to nurse more at certain times- at 6months- she would have had a new spurt and also some changes if you have started food- this would change her eating pattern. Each baby and each breast and milk production is different- so -yes 6hrs. is a good night stretch even still at 7months.
Try to make sure she is having more opportunities during the day to nurse to help keep the milk production up and hopefully she won't need to wake as many times at night.
3hrs of naps may be too much for her as well- try cutting out at least one of these- better to have her a little cranky during the day than waking more at night.
If you don't feed her cereal etc. yet- try doing so- and give her cereal close to bedtime-so that hopefully she'll make it longer sleeping.
I think crying it out for an hour and half is a bit much-but you should be able to tell if she is really frantic crying or is just fussing-
I was able to let my first-son- cry off and on and learn to make it longer at night,
but with my second child-daughter- who was more stubborn- she would not calm down- and got to the point that she was making herself sick with crying. She eventually learned to stay asleep better at night- but just was with us longer-and after a year could handle learning to sleep on her own better.
So- if your daughter can make it through the crying at night(and you can)-try it for a few nights- if it's not better by then- hopefully one of the other suggestions will work- deal with the day time routine-
just be sure she's eating enough through the day-
it's not like giving her a bottle and knowing how much she is getting-
you have to know she's nursing enough and getting full from the breast and getting enough milk at other times than at night- she has to transition maybe from getting better feedings at night.
Hope some of this helps- just try different routines, feel it out, and go with your gut.

i did use ferber it took almost 2 weeks then we moved 2mo later and had to do it again. My son was breast feed so i made some of my own rules, he would go to bed at 730 i wouldnt nurse him till 4am if he woke up then it was back to sleep till the sun was up. I thnk it was in the ferber book that they said you can recondition when baby gets hungry they get hungry when they are use to eating. Ferber takes awhile and can be worth it after the inital week of long hours, can you wake your baby during the day after a 2-3hr nap so she wont sleep all day? Its hard with breast feed babies you just never know how much they get to eat and if they are really hungry. You can put some of your own exceptions to ferber, i think that anyway, and i aslo think that 12hrs is too long for baby to go without some milk. my son is 15mo and will sleep now till 5-6 adn then i nurse him. Can your husband/significant other, go in to see her in the night its worse when the breasts come in and thats what your daughter is use to, might be easier if you dont go in however not always an option.

Hi Valerie,
I feel your pain I went through this with my daughter whom is now 13. It is terrible but ....the Ferber method worked for me. It took one solid week of listening to her scream but finally she got into a sleeping routine. I would feed her at 10:00 and she would scream for over an hour at first then got the hint. I never had a problem again. They need to find a way to soothe themselves don't give her a binky you are just going to go through the withdrawals of that later on.
Good luck

Hi Valerie,
We had some major sleep issues with our fourth (we have 7), who also had allergy/colic issues. Our lifeline was a book recommended by our Dr. called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child," by Dr. marc Weissbluth. His method does involve crying it out, but it's a very thorough and consistent method which walks you through step by step, and varies according to age, situation, etc. I would highly recommend it -- we've used it so much, very successfully each time. good Luck.

Hello,
I am mom to 3 boys...3 1/2, 2, and 5 months. They all go into bed between 7 and 7:45 and sleep through the night! I am not always sure how we got to that point with each one or what really worked for us, but we tried little tricks along the way to help. #1 is a consistent sleep routine at night. Pajamas, brushing teeth, reading, and then bed. Our older sons run up the stairs for bed at nights...they thrive on the routine.

With the baby, I agree with maybe 2 naps...but more for your sake...they will be a bit longer and more consistent (morning and afternoon) if you cut that down. Have you started cereal. We feel that a bowl of whole grain oatmeal and some veggies/fruit have helped our little guy make it through the night.
Also, the pacifier could be helpful...it could just be that she needs the comfort of sucking. I think for our second son, we started giving him a little water in a bottle if he woke up. No one gave us this advice, we just kind of figured he would suck a bit, but not really be getting a feeding out of it. Not sure if it's what did the trick or not, but he was sleeping through at 3 months.

Whatever you do, don't worry...it sometimes seems like it will never come and then one day it seems that they just work it out themselves. But my big advice for is to start those consistent bedtime routines NOW...it will pay off for years to come when you and your husband can sit and have a glass of wine and relax together after everyone is all tucked in!!! Good luck!

It is perfectly normal for a baby this age to wake several times to nurse! Please don't let you poor babe cry it out again. There have been recent studies showing permanent damage is done when cortisol is released during the crying. I have an 8 month old who doesn't even nap more than 20 mins during the day so I can relate to being cranky and tired. But honestly, my babies well being is more important to me. Good luck.
PS I have heard good things about "non cry sleep solution" but have not yet read it myself

Was she sleeping through then night and recently started waking? It could be a growth spurt and she's hungrier than normal.

Also, does she use a pacifier? My daughter was using me as a human pacifier, she wasn't hungry, just needed to suck in order to fall back asleep. She's 2 and still using a pacifier to sleep but it kept me from having to nurse her during the night.

Three naps a day is probably a lot, maybe try to cut her down to two naps a day and try to make her last meal closer to her bedtime.

Hi Valerie,
As another first time mom I understand the frustration. I am an Early Childhood Educator and I have taken a lot of classes and trainings on children's behaviors and sleep patterns. As the old saying goes, "It takes three times to start a habit, Seven times to break a habit". One thing I can recommend is the book called Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twleve Weeks Old by Suzie Giordano, "The Baby Coach". This book gives you step by step direction on how to get your child sleeping up to twelve hours through the night without any issues. I didn't start using these techniques until my daughter was 6 months old and she was sleeping from 8:00-7:30 in two weeks! This book also worked for my sister and two of my friends. It helps you cut the feedings during the night and maintain a good schedule during the day to get the child to sleep longer at night. I promise you that if you follow the books suggestions, it will work!
Good Luck!
C.

Valerie,

I know it is so incredibly hard to go without sleep and to have your sleep interrupted each night. But please know that it is completely normal for a 7-month-old to wake 3x/night and need to nurse. There are many pediatricians (including Ferber) who would say that this is not true, but just as many who would say the opposite. Even at that age, babies need that milk; they have much shorter sleep cycles and much smaller stomachs than adults do. It is not good for them to be expected to "sleep through the night" at that age, and when your baby cries for you, she's crying because she needs you. She's much too young to manipulate and much too young to be as independent as we often expect.

Please, please reconsider crying it out. This is terribly traumatic for the litte person. What babies learn from this is not a healthy self-reliance but rather a self-reliance based on despair; they learn that when they need you, you will not come. Sure, they stop crying eventually, but that's only because they've given up on you.

Here's a link to a recent study out of Harvard about the perils of crying it out (and there are many other university-based studies confirming their conclusions):

http://www.hno.harvard.edu/gazette/1...enNeedTou.html

Have you seen Elizabeth Pantley's book The No Cry Sleep Solution? This can get you to the same place but without the trauma that can disrupt the parent-child relationship.

I say all of this with respect--just wanted to provide a viewpoint that we don't often hear in American culture (since I know you'll have heard plenty of support for Ferber et. al.).

Good luck,
J.

Like you, we had a tough time with our son breaking the up at night cycles. At this point, I would think that two solid naps a day would suffice for her age. Also, if she is eating solids, she technically can sleep through the night but has obviously become accustomed to nursing for self soothing. What worked for us was just going on every 10-15 min during crying to let him know we were there but night night. Eventually, he worked through it. It took days and days though. Also, we started off by decreasing his milk intake through the night bit by bit and then went on to the crying it out method. Good luck. It will pass. You must be consistent for any method to work, period.

Valerie,
Ever hear of the book "the baby whisper"? It helped me a lot. I know time to read a book now seems tough, but skip to the sleeping section.
She basically says to put the baby to sleep at its time, then, as you are going to bed, say 10pm, nurse the baby with out waking her, no diaper change, just put her right back down, this eliminates them waking and hopefully gives you 6 or 7 hours. the book is great!It will help if you get her on an am and pm nap, just 2 a day. think E.A.S.Y eat,activity,sleep and time for you.thats what the book says!good luck!
N.

I recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Children." I haven't read the whole thing, but what we have used from it so far has worked well. I also have a 7 month old daughter, and we are down to one wake up at night (around 4am), when she nurses and goes right back to sleep. She goes to bed at 6:30pm, gets up at 6am. If she does wake at other times she may fuss for a minute, but generally "talks" herself back to sleep. It sounds like your baby is starting to learn that she can't fall asleep unless she is fed, and this book talks a lot about helping your children learn to "self sooth." That said, some of his suggestions aren't much different than Ferber's, but he seems more flexible and supportive of parents making the choices that are right for them, while giving information about sleep research and babies.
Good luck,
M.
P.S. Mine also had colic (thankfully only until about 12 weeks), and was dairy intolerant (that also resolved, around 4.5 months) so I'm with you all the way!

Hi Valerie! I'm going through something similar with my 6 month old but she is my second and I did "ferber" my first one. My second one is up 3-5 times per night and also wants to nurse back to sleep. I'm gearing up to sleep train her very soon!

First of all.....hang in there. It's mentally (and physically) tough to "sleep train" a baby. My advice is to stick with it. Pick a week to just do it and mentally prepare yourself to be challenged and exhausted. Once you set that expectation, it might not seem so bad. Also, you'll probably see that each night the crying will get less and less. BTW, an hour and a half of crying is quite typical for the first night of ferbering. Of course it's incredibly agonizing on mom.

Good luck and know that this too shall pass.

N.

I have a 7 month old too (Aug 11th) who gets up 3 times a night to nurse. I don't have any advice but thank you for posting this. I'll be reading your responses!

I'm losing my mind. I work full time and have two older (7 and 13) boys, both in sports, both with homework. I ran right through a red light the other day, didn't even see it. I'm so tired...

Wow... I couldn't help but respond to this one! I had my first baby when I was just shy of 31 and it's hard giving up 100% of your freedom all at once, isn't it? It's even harder if you expect to carry on any semblance of the normal life you had before children and especially hard if you haven't been around a lot of kids. Been there, too, and don't worry there if life on the other side of not sleeping through the night. That's the good news. Here's the bad - you just have to adapt and live through some of these moments. Like I've said before to people, if you can ease the stress burden on yourself at this time, do so. This will only help in your ability to deal with your child in a loving, patient manner. We all need to find our way through parenthood. Regarding the Ferber method, I did let my first child cry it out while I sat outside her door and sobbed. The other two I tried different things which if truth be told, I am prouder about. But, as I said, we each have to find our way and if you feel that you don't have other options, you can try. As I look back on my life now, I realize that if I had given myself more time and space from my other obligations, I could have resolved things differently. I think I would have put my daughter in bed (or near to me) from the beginning. People may argue with me about this, but I feel my last two kids are more secure than my first child.... so this I say to you - take a DEEP breath, put your beautiful child on your lap and plan to do NOTHING today but play with this little person and try and see what might work between you. You can even lay down with her for a nap! The point is for you to take the pressure off of yourself because sooner or later, she will get it!

I agree in that cutting the naps down to 2 would help a lot. My daughter had this problem also sometimes napping so late in the day that she really wasn't as tired or treated going to bed at night like another nap.
I also know that breastmilk is a lot easier to digest than formula so it is in and out faster. So sometimes breastfed babies wake up more because they are hungry- not always, but sometimes.
As for the "cry-it-out" method, I cannot be of much help since we co-sleep with our 15 month old.
It will get better.

K.
stayinhomeandlovinit.com/kkeefe

Dear frustrated...
I have a 13month old and went throught the same thing and it wasnt easy but after placing her in bed and letting her cry for a while she finally went to sleep. You know your baby so you can tell when she just wants mom and dad or something just isnt right... Its hard to hear them cry and not go in there but like I said after one night she has been sleeping t hrought the night and also I can lay her in her crib for scheduled naps and she doesnt even cry she knows its nap time.. Good luck

Purchase, read the book Beyon Baby-Wise...and then follow through...The book emphasises placing your child on a feeding, waking, and sleeping schedule...Children respond better to a schedule. Our child was sleeping throughout the night at 3 months and he currently (18 mos) takes 2 naps a day. Excellent break for us and he just thrives when he gets an adequate amt. of sleep. Another thing it does is that it gives us as parents confidence on how to respond to certain cries depending on the time of day...We know when he is hungry, or when he is tired etc etc. Also the baby starts to trust you that you know what he wants and what his/her needs are at that time... Our philosophy in raising children is to treat them as a welcome addition to our family and not the center of it and I believe that is how this book approaces it...

when you do nurse her during the night decrease the time by two minutes each time, until her body gets used to not getting fed in the night.

Hi Valerie! When my baby was 7 mo old we would make sure she didn't go more than 3 hrs without eating during the day. (that way you make sure you get the longest stretch at night)We also would wake her up when we were going to sleep (say if she goes down @ 8:30, and you don't go to bed until 10:00) get her to have a nice long nurse -tickling her feet or rubbing her nose to keep her awake. Then put her down for sleep. Usually she wouldn't get up to nurse until about 5:30-6:30 am which she would then go back to sleep for another 2 hrs (make sure you keep the lights low, and your talking to a minumum). Sometimes she would get up once or twice during the night before I knew she needed to nurse. I would give her about 5 min of crying/self soothing.(less if she is really working herself up) If that didn't work, I would go in and give her the pacifier and pat her back (no nursing or picking up!) It seemed like an awful chore the first couple nights, but worked better than I had imagined. Don't worry about confusing her with nursing/witholding. She knows the difference between a hungry belly, and just crying bc she is awake and wants you to come feed her. (it's you that needs to figure that out) =) My girlie is now 9 mo old, and sleeps from about 9:00 to 7:00 -there is hope!! She still wakes up from time to time, but I hear her (moms will never get over waking when they wake) talk a little to herself, roll around, and then drift right back off. It's an important step that babies take in learning to self soothe. As moms, we need to allow them to learn it (cause they sure wouldn't by themselves). I hope this helps, and Maeve and I wish you all the best -restful nights included!

Hi Valerie -

Sleep deprivation is so hard. My son slept through the night at 3-4 months and then one day decided he wanted to wake up every 2 hours. My husband and I did not want to do the cry it out method because if we did let my son cry it out he would make himself vomit....so much fun. Anyway after months of no sleep we could not take it anymore so when he was 14 months I went to the store and got the Ferber book and figured if the book did not work I could drop my son off at Dr. Ferber’s office at Children’s Hospital :) I followed the time chart they give. I would nurse my son put him in his crib say night night and leave the room. What I liked about Ferber was I could go back in at the time intervals I think it was 2 min then 5 then 7 etc working up to 10 min intervals the first night. It was important for me that my son not cry all night. I would go in when the time was up and would pick him up hug him for about 1-2 min and then put him back in his crib. It was really important that I was consistent with the time and putting him back in the crib. The first night it took around 1.5 to 2 hours for him to sleep and then second night it took about 20 min. I also made sure he had a bottle/ nurse before bed so I was not thinking is he hungry. It is so hard to hear your baby cry, what got me through the first night was being able to go in and comfort him for a minute or two. Ever since then he has been sleeping thorough the night consistently he goes down around 8-8:30 and wakes around 6-6:30 and naps 1-3 daily. There are times when he still wakes in the night but that usually has to do with if he has a poop or had a cold.
At 7 months your baby may still want to nurse during the night so you may be able to try and decrease the amount of feedings...maybe cut one out the first week and then another the second. Also not sure if your baby is eating solids yet? I know some friends who try and make sure that the baby is eating drinking every 3 hours so that when it is time for bed they have had all the calories they need for the day. Every baby is different, the Ferber method worked for us and I liked that I could be flexible with it ie: time intervals. Also I found that my son would not sleep well when certain milestones happened ie: crawling and walking.
Good luck, take it day by day, it does get better and eventually you will sleep 

Hi, Valerie,

We had the same problem, only we weren't so lucky as to have a napping baby!! :) I was told to eliminate the night nursings because, even though my daughter was waking up for them, she didn't need them. We had to break her of that habit before we could work on her sleeping through the night. It is very tough the first few nights, but it did work. If you don't have Ferber's book, check it out from the library. The method isn't as Draconian as it sounds. You can go in at intervals and verbally comfort the baby. It does send her mixed messages to nurse her sometimes and not others because she will not know which times she will get nursed, so she'll just keep crying. You have to do it cold turkey, which is hard, I know (believe me), but, hopefully, it won't take too long. Also, have your husband go in overnight because she won't expect to nurse from him, so it may be easier to break the habit.

Good luck!

Good grief! You sound wiped out. Remember she's only been on the planet for a few months and has no concept of what day and night are. I have 4 kids, none of whom slept throught the night at that young age. They are now healthy, happy teens and none of them was ever allowed to "cry it out". I nursed on demand and co-slept at night so we both had good sleep. This is such a temporary time in her whole life. Give yourself a break and listen to her needs. It won't go on forever and you may enjoy learning her rhythms, which will change repeatedly over the next year. Look up MOTHERING magazine for great, loving support. Get both of you checked by a good chiropractor.

Hi Valerie...I was not going to respond because I am definitly not an expert with this but I have a 10 month old son. He sleeps thru the night now from 7 to 7 am. It is a dream. He goes down with no problem since he was about 6 months old. I did not breast feed we used formula. The BIG difference I saw with my son was as soon as I gave him rice cereal with formula mixed and some fruit (baby food) along with a 7 oz. bottle he slept thru the night. She must be waking up because she is hungry and he did the same thing. Ask your doctor if you can feed her cereal at night with breast feeding..I bet it does the trick!!

Good luck,

N.

I probably mention this a lot in my posts, but I cannot recommend any more highly the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" for sorting out sleep issues. I think everything that man wrote has been dead-on for my son, and I credit his good sleep habits (he's 2 now) to this book. One thing it mentions is that babies up until 9 months of age need to feed generally once, but sometimes twice per night. I found that my son really only needed once per night, but he wasn't getting enough milk at each breastfeeding during the night, and so he was waking up again quickly to eat. We started feeding him a bottle exclusively at night when he was 3-4 months old, he would drink more in a single sitting, and sleep the rest of the way through the night. When he was 9 months old, we cut out the night feeding, and he adjusted immediately. Get that book and switch to a bottle at night--that's my advice!

Try cutting her day naps down to two naps. Her first nap should be no more than 4 to 6 hours after she first wakes up in the morning. Her second nap should be no less than four hours after her first nap, and should last no more than an hour or so. This will help her to be tired at night when its bedtime, and hopefully will help her sleep through the night.

Here's an example: Baby wakes up at 6am, so her first nap should start between 10am and 1pm, and should last about two hours. Baby naps from 11am til 1pm and wakes up or is awakend. Second nap will be around 5pm. She sleeps for an hour, is awakend and fed and put back to sleep three to four hours later, at 9 or 10pm.

Hopefully this helps!!
K.
Mother of two crazy teens!!

Im not trying to be critical, but I think your baby is too young for the Ferber method. I have 2 kids and one was a great sleeper the other a nightmare (as In wouldnt take a nap for the first 4 months because she was so colicky and cranky!)
But normal babies wake up a few times a night. I would try not nursing, just rub her back get her comfy again and leave the room. Maybe even have your partner do it so you are no where in sight?
Good luck....Her colick and sleeplessness will pass!

Valerie - the book The No Cry Method by Pantley has some great tips on weaning off of nursing in the middle of the night.
Letting babies cry it out I think works if your baby cries, but does not get hysterical. I think hysterics means you need to go to your baby.
Also, have your husband try to calm her down first. If it is you, she'll want your milk!

Hi! We Ferberized our daughter though she was not a breast fed baby as she started in our home as a foster child, she is now adopted. If you read the Ferber book titled Solving Your CHilds Sleep Problems (or something like that) he points out that there is an age where children no longer need to eat in the night. I am unsure what age it is as I forget.

The Ferber method is great but it does require stick-to-it-ness. Once you start you really need to see it through. As my Pedi has always said, crying does not hurt the child. I also know that you don't leave them to cry endlessly, you pop in on them after say 5 minutes just to reassure them you are there then you leave and lengthen the time between pop ins until they fall asleep on their own.

The crying can be hard to listen to but the value of a good nights sleep for yourself is a huge payoff. My daughter has a much better mom because I sleep at night and her disposition is better too! Hang in there, that full night of sleep is just around the bend for all of you!

The first thing I would do would be to start taking her to the Chiropractor. Babies bodies go through so much trauma when they are being born that nerves get pinch and we have no idea. But, seeing a Chiropractor for a couple of weeks will make a tremendous improvement! Trust me! I hear you! I was pretty frusterated myself with lack of sleep when I had my first son. He was 6 months old and his days and nights were reversed! I was young and had no idea what I was doing. I got the book, On Becoming Babywise, and it helped me establish a feeding, sleeping and waking method that I have continued with the rest of my boys. But, I also started taking him to the Chiropractor at 6 months old too. Two weeks after taking him he slept through the night for the first time and continued the rest of the year. I was astonished and relieved. Since then I have had 3 more boys ages 4, 3, and my youngest is 7 months. All of my boys were sleeping through the night by 2 months. 1 week after they were all born I had them at the Chiropractor getting adjusted and I had established a feeding, waking and feeding routine. It makes your life soooooo much easier knowing what to expect from your baby instead of the constant guessing. So, bottomline, my suggestion, find a local Chiropractor and get her set up, and start a feeding, waking and sleeping routine. My 7 month old has this schedule. 6:30am breastfeed, 7:30a. breakfast(applesauce etc.), 9am naptime, 10:30-11am he wakes up, then I nurse him, around noon I feed him lunch, 1pm naptime (also, at all of these naptimes, he's wide awake and I never nurse him to get him to sleep. He falls asleeop on his own) 3pm walke up, 3:30 nurse & a little snack, 5pm naptime, 6pm wakeup and dinner, 8:30pm last feeding, 9pm bedtime and he doesn't wake up all night until after 6am. Now, mind you, I have 3 older boys that I'm also getting to school and picking up and they are involved with sports etc. It's a busy day, but having my baby on a routine has made that part of my life less hectic. Good luck.

Elizabeth Pantley has an awesome book called the No Cry Sleep Solution. It is a great resource. It takes about 1-2 months of effort, but well worth it. It helped us tremendously. The book is very gentle and child centered, yet effective.
Good luck!
Cheers,
K.

Hello Valerie
Have you start your son on baby cereal it seem that he is ungry if he still get up 3 time a night,try to give him a tables spoon of baby cereal before his bedtime, that what I did with my kids at 7 month he should sleep all night.
GOOD LUCK

First - HUGS to you! It is SO tough. I have had only one *decent* sleeper and the other two have been tough. My middle child was the worst, and at 12 mos was routinely staying awake for 2 to 5 hours straight almost every night. It was brutal and I was losing my mind!!

We did try Ferber (along with every other sleep method) and actually found CIO to be the hardest on us and the least effective. He actually got worse after a few days of "Ferberizing" and would start to scream and fight even going into his room! It was miserable and we abandoned it after a week to work on getting back to at least having him go to sleep in the evening and not be afraid of crying alone at night.

At 13 mos we were referred to a neurologist/sleep specialist for him. I was afraid he'd say to try CIO again and i wasn't going to do it, but he didn't. He said that for some kids it can really intensify separation anxiety (even Ferber admits this now) and explained that sleep is actually a neurological function and as such it matures different;y for kid-to-kid. He gave us a plan to help consolodate what little sleep Spencer was getting, and after a couple of months of shifting his sleep hours we finally (at 18 mos) had him sleeping through the night for the first time. (Later, we learned that he is celiac--gluten intolerent--and it's entirely possible that part of his problem was a tummyache all the time!) Now he goes down without a fuss and sleeps through every time and takes a 2 hour nap every afternoon!

Our youngest is now 7 mos and going through her own sleep challenges. She is teething and learning to crawl and the combination of the two is making her VERY restless! I WISH she would go back to sleep after nursing each time. But she's up every couple of hours to nurse/cuddle even on a good night. At this point, as crazed with fatigue as I am, I know that the important part is that she goes down well in the evening and that she's not afraid of her bed. I know now that it *will* happen when she's neurologically ready, and that this is a typical time for sleep disturbabnces--milestones and teething will both disrupt sleep.

Hang in there. I can't advise you about CIO because it was so counter-productive for us, but I can tell you that what your baby is doing is frustratingly normal, and that you're not doing anything wrong. Some babies are sleepers and some aren't! Hang in there--it will happen, I promise!

I would cut out one of those naps and nap her 2 times a day. If she is up at 6am, nap her at 10am, then at 3pm, and I wouldnt let her sleep longer than 1 to 1 1/2 hours. Wake her if you have to. I wouldnt nap her any later than 3pm or 3:30pm.

Hi Valerie,
First of all, congrats on your little girl! I had a cranky, colicky first one too, so I can sympathize. Sounds like she has developed her own schedule,which is playing havoc with Mommy.It will take a little time and patience to change her to a more manageable one,but it can be done. Poor you! I can tell you, in about six weeks it will be better.A few suggestions:
1) Might she be getting too hot or too cold at night? A room temp change as little as five degrees can make a big difference in how soundly your child sleeps.Do you cover her when putting her down? Not cover her? Try each for at least five nights, to see if it makes a difference.
2) Tried swaddling? She'll either love it or hate it~ you'll know right away. Works like a charm for some wee ones.
3) Does she use a binky? You could try one just at night if you don't think she's really hungry. She will stop using it when she's ready.
4)Is she teething?? If so, that would explain a lot of the crankiness, sleep disruption, etc. Nursing soothes them, also dippimg a clean washcloth(which hasn't been washed with fabric softener) in cool water and rubbing her gums gently should help her. She will chew on your finger as you do this , and probably she will drool a little more than usual.
Finally, grab any sleep you can! Forget about everything else, and when she naps , you nap. You need that sleep!
Hang in there.
Hugs!

Hi,

One thing that worked with all four of my babies (youngest is only 4 months old now), was swaddling. I hate the Ferber method, as it is just heartbreaking. With my oldest, we were going through what you are, and it was exhausting. We had swaddled her as an infant (probably up until one month old), but when she was 8 months old, my husband bought one of those swaddling blankets (they have velcro to hold them closed). The large size blankets go up to 24 pounds. Anyway, we swaddled our great, big 8 month old baby for the first time in about 7 months, and she fell right asleep and slept through until morning...about 10 hours straight! Now, we always swaddle the babies until about 8-9 months old, and it works wonders. It diminishes the startle reflex and makes them feel less alone and more secure.

Good luck!!

Hi Valerie, I had this experience with both of my children, now 3 years old and 13 months old. One, is that it does not hurt your child to cry. For some babies this is the way they end there day. When my son was about four months old, we decided that we were going to let him learn how to self-soothe(put himself to sleep). The first night was unbearable, he screamed for over an hour. My husband and I went in several times to check on him and to softly talk to him, but never took him out of the crib. He finally went to sleep and stayed asleep. The next night was a little less with the crying and finally by the end of the week he was going to sleep all on his own. Well, we used soft music in his room as well as a mobile that showed pictures on the ceiling. He also was a big fan of his binky. My daughter on the other hand, we had whole other issues with her. We did the same for her but she has a soft blanket that needs to be in the crib with her and it is the weirdest thing but she uses it to smell it. Both of my children were breastfeed children and both of them slept through the night at four months. This being almost 11 hours every night without feedings. Both of my children are tiny so I thought they would be up for ever but as long as they are eating enough food throughout the day they should not need to be feed at night. Unfortunately, you can not let you her sleep throughout the day. Try to keep her up, if you have to put her down to bed earlier. Routine is also very key when it comes to babies, bath, bottle, story, lullabies, and then to bed. Once you repeat the process enough, she will catch on and have no problems going to bed and staying asleep. Try not to switch back and forth of letting her cry and feeding her because in a way you are sending her mixed messages. Children are a lot smarter then adults give them credit for. I hope you were able to take something from all this. Good Luck! It does get easier. Amy