Almost to the 3 1/2 Year Mark Cancer-free

Updated on April 27, 2012
G.S. asks from Hopatcong, NJ
6 answers

I'm not quite sure just what this is yet, a question or a vent but here it goes. On 9/11/08 my husband was diagnosed w/Stage 2 Bladder Cancer. Only Stage 2 as some would say, thankfully it was all removed surgically and w/a regimen of cystoscopies, medication, pet scans & other testing things have remained at a standstill(under the care of a urologist & oncologist at a cancer center . There have been a number of scares however, last year we thought that it had traveled into his lower region and into his brain, God willing it didn't. Since my husband's diagnosis a lot has gone on in our lives as we have two girls, an 8 yr old & a 14 yr old. He was laid off from his job as a vice-president is an now just your average Joe making peanuts, but he is home much more taking in every waking moment possible, The summer he was laid off almost seemed like a gift for all of the hours of the girls' lives he missed. He took out an enormous life insurance policy so the girls and myself won't have to worry and we are now living our lives in a cozy lilt 700 sq ft lakehouse vs the 2800 sq ft home we were upside in I guess a lot of last year was the preparation of the inevitable which you never want to have to think about, but now that all of that is past, we are enjoying life to the fullest.! . Another concern is a growth he has in his lower aoertic region that they have been monitoring for the past few years which have shown no significant growth. They are hesitant about doing a biopsy because that would involve going directly through eight inches of muscle, so this is where that stands. My concern is that at his routine check-up for his medications & suchl his urine picked up cancerous enzeyems (sp?) and the dr said that they would be sending it out. That was on the 5th of this month. My husband was to have had blood work done the following day, however I had just had knee surgery and I think he's using that as an excuse for not have had it done yet but wouldn't they callll w/the results of the one test? He's come up w/a million reasons not to have the b/w done, maybe he's scared, I know he hasn't been feeling right.. I'm a nervous wreck about things and I don't buy the whole no news is good news. , I truly feel for anyone who has had to go through this, at any type of any stage. I think it affects people in so many ways, at so many levels buti all the same. I look at how this has affected my husband, okay he hasn't lost his hair but he worries about things and then there's our 8 year old who was actually disappointed that her dad didn't lose all of his hair because she wanted to shave hers and donate it the children with cancer. I guess it's all about turning things around, so last year we cried happy tears as Haley cut off 9 inches of her beautiful curly hair for wigs for kids! And this weekend he turns 44 and whether or not we hear from the dr, we are planning a celebration of his life. I just guess we all get a little selfish and want a little more every now and then.....Thank you for listening.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

He finally did go Friday to have his bloodwork done YAY! And we ended up w/about 25 people over on Saturday for a celebration for his birthday, but then we spent the eve of his bday in the emergeycny room b/c he has been nursing a horrible headache since Thursday night plus some severe dizziness (not just from the headache, the deisoriented,, clumsy kind). So after a ct scan, they advised us that we need to follow up w/our dr due to their findings......................... It was a rough night prior to that news, he is allergic to percosette & he had a real bad reaction to the other medicine they gave him. I know God only gives us what he thinks we can handle, so I'm thinking maybe if I go on a crash diet & lose a little weight he won't think I can hold anymore....what do u think? Well, we've gotten thru everything else, what's one more thing :)

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D..

answers from Charlotte on

Gerri, bless your hearts, you are walking through a labrynth right now, and you've all done so well! Stronger people would wilt going through what you have.

I know you are a nervous wreck, but stand up for what has to be done and take him down there for his blood work. You just have to do it.

Don't worry about your 8 year old and the issue with the hair. She truly doesn't understand and she is trying to help in her own way. It's okay.

I'm so glad that you are planning this celebration. It will be very special.

Saying prayers for you and your family, and hugs to your husband.

Dawn

2 moms found this helpful

M.L.

answers from Chicago on

Oh wow - I wish I had something to add other than support. Your family is surely going through a lot. Best of luck to you all!

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hang in there Gerri-cancer is truly horrid and much more so that people who don't have it realize. You are never free from it even though you might be free at the moment. It can always reoccur and those of us with cancer will always be waiting for that other shoe to drop. I am just coming out of treatment for stage 1 breast cancer and am realizing how much more affected by it than i even thought. Everyone sees that I am healthy and it is basically forgotten. What they don't see is me up every night wondering if each little pain is a metastisis of my cancer. It is all but driving me crazy. I am so happy to hear though that your husband is in a less stressful life situation. I am a huge believer that controlliing stress is mandatory. The inflamation that is caused by this is so bad. The one and only good thing about cancer is how it makes you reprioritize your life. I know that I am a better person now for having it.
I really hope that you have someone that you can talk to about this. I know that you don't want to worry him by your worry but at the same time you need to talk about it. Please fell free to PM me.
One last thing-if you haven't already you should get the book Anti Cancer: A New Way of Life. Its an amazing manual on how to live so that your cancer doesn't come back.

2 moms found this helpful

J.U.

answers from Washington DC on

Sounds like your a strong woman and your doing the best you can in keeping things together. Your little girl is super sweet for her donation. She wanted to help where she could. I am sure your husband is very scared. I know I would be.

Just talk to him, let him know that you can take him to get bloodwork and afterward have a nice lunch together, just the two of you.

I wish you all the very best!! Take care.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Praying for your family!
O. of my dear friends was diagnosed with leukemia late last year and I realize how touch-and-go dealing with cancer can be.
Definitely the best "UP" side to cancer is that neither the patient nor his/her friends and family ever look at life quite the same way again--as you know!
Cancer does horrible things, yet it can also increase our acceptance, our appreciation, gratitude and good perspective.
Hang in there. All the best!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.R.

answers from New York on

You've been very blessed thus far to be given what you have plus the strength to deal with it all. I am also being reminded that suffering in life leads us to a closer relationship with God.
I wanted to mention a couple of things which you may or may not already be aware of. That is, many many people have overcome cancer through diet and other alternatives to chemotherapy. I would suggest researching other people's methods. For example, cancer can not survive in an alkaline and oxygen rich environment: Phkillscancer.com
Also cannabis, yes the plant, is a cancer killing agent when taken as an oil orally or even juiced. You can contact your local NORML group or online for more info.
When life is on the line, it's worth trying every chance at saving it.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions