So I have a 4.5 month old, he's my first and normally I'm not a total basket case, I actually consider myself a pretty level headed woman in general but this little guy has me feeling things... for example his head and feet are getting closer to the perimeter of the bassinet and when I see him growing I get this sinking feeling in my stomach. I know it means I have to put him in the crib soon in his own room. I hate the idea of having him so far from me. Then we gave him a little rice cereal just to try last week, and he ate it...I haven't given him much since because although I"m excited he is growing up and healthy a part of me hates the fact that my milk isn't going to be enough for him anymore. Kind of like he doesn't need me as much little by little? I'm reading this over and thinking to myself "you sound like a nutcase!". Just wondering if anyone else had feelings like this...
Ok, I cried at the hospital when they brought her to me because i had this sinking feeling that from here on out, there would come a day when she would be old enough to leave home and carve her own path. I still cannot bear that thought, and have a much deeper appreciation for all the heart pangs my mother still goes through for my sister (age 40) and myself even though we are 40 yrs and 34 yrs respectively. And even though we are all grown up, any time sh*t hits the fan - whatever it might be - moms gets woken up to give me advice and lend a shoulder and wipe a tear - even though she is 9,000 miles away!
I loved Helen's post below....it's the cycle of life...
1 mom found this helpful
Report This
P.C.
answers from
San Francisco
on
You don't HAVE to put him in a bed in another room. You can put his bed in you room,give you the closeness you desire.Are you at home with him? Sounds like you need more time with him.
P..
Report This
P.W.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Yes, you are being ridiculous (in a good way), and don't worry, you have tons more time and many wonderful moments ahead.
Women's emotions (my own included) are often ridiculous.
Report This
More Answers
H.D.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I had to smile when I read your post. My oldest bio kids are 24 and 22. One is married (eek!) and the other has piercings, long hair and tattoos (double EEK!). I looked at them over Thanksgiving and wondered where those little babies went?? Was I a good mom? Did they get loved on enough? Disciplined right? And when they both gave me a great big hug at the airport and said, "Mom, I miss you already, I love you."....well, that says it all, doesn't it?
You don't want to lose those moments, you see them slipping away so quickly. You can't stop it and you know you wouldn't even if you could. =) Take the time to count the fingers and toes, kiss the jelly rolls. He loves you unconditionally, as you do him. Enjoy him...and celebrate the milestones. One day you will look UP into his adult child eyes and he will smile at you and say, "thanks mom" and you will know that EVERY moment was worth it and you wouldn't change a thing.
1 mom found this helpful
Report This
L.L.
answers from
San Francisco
on
L.,
Your motherly instincts are kicking in stongly. Keeping your son close to you is not a bad thing, it is totally natural and understandable. He is only little. Just a question, for you ... why did you use cereal? 4.5 is pretty young to start solids. Most Dr's in the US won't suggest it until at least 6 or 7 months. If you have enough milk, you don't need to feed him solids just yet. No one told me as a 1st time mom either... I had to find out from other breastfeeding moms.... if your child has 5-7 wet diapers a day and is gaining wt nicely don't worry; your breastmilk alone is sufficient for him. Breastmilk breaks down quicker than formula though, so some people think that adding cereal at night will stop a child from waking ... but it really is not good for a child that is this young. Check out kellymom.com for great information about breastfeeding and other "new mom" questions.
You say that you know you will have to put him into his own crib ... why? If you are not ready to move him, keeping him with you is a wonderful thing. Have you ever heard of Attachment Parenting? Many families who embrase AP keep their children close by for a while. When my daughter was born, I had very little milk and the Dr suggested that I keep her with me 24/7, as close to me as possible ... skin to skin as much as I could stand in order to stimulate milk production. Because of this I ended up researching a lot about breastfeeding, the benefits of breastfeeding for 2yrs as the World Health Organization promotes, attachment parenting, slings, and more. I found a ton of information in the magazine Mothering and online at Mothering.com and kellymom.com. Both of the online sources have extensive knowledge on breastfeeding and what is "normal" for babies who are exclusively breastfead. Society has been using formula for so long that many wt charts (and Dr's) neglect to factor into consideration what is normal weight gain for a child who's exclusively breastfed.
Your litte son will need you for years to come. Don't feel you have to transition him until both you and he are ready. There is no right time according to any book, one's mother or mother in law, or anyone other than you, your spouse, and your child. Just keep trusting your Natural Mama Instincts; You know deep in your heart what is right for you and your child.
Good luck mama!
1 mom found this helpful
Report This
L.H.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Are you being ridiculous? Absolutely not!
Parenting is full of these bitter-sweet moments, as the baby/toddler/preschooler/child/teen that we loved just as they were changes and takes another step on the journey to adulthood.
What helped me was remembering that it would be worse to NOT have these moments because it would mean my child was not progressing down this road.
Enjoy each stage.
Report This
S.L.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Totally, completely normal. I cried when we moved our daughter from her Pack'n'Play in our room to her crib, I cried when we weaned her (that was especially hard because I didn't want to wean, but I started nursing school and it was getting impossible, and she was 18 months anyway...), and I cried the first time she climbed the ladder at the playground by herself. Right there in front of all the other moms, just burst into tears. It's especially poignant for me since I know this will be our only child, so each milestone she reaches, I feel happy and proud, but also sad.
I thought I was going crazy, too, but several of my friends said they did the same thing. The key, however, is to not let your sadness about your child's growing up interfere with letting him actually do it.
Hang in there!
S.
Report This
D.V.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Hi,
I have a 4 month old and I feel the same way. I cried so hard when I had to get rid of his new born clothes. I cried again when he went to size 1 diapers, now he just got into size 2. I know what you mean and how your feeling. I was on here the other day and reading a posting about a Mom asking how her son will be with her when he hits his twenties. I started thinking about my little boy leaving me.. I wrote my husband and said I want 2 more and I want a girl because boys always leave their Moms and girls don't lol. I find myself worring about when he grows up and I know I should just be enjoying him. I love that he is growing and the new things he his learning but on the other hand I miss the new baby he was. Its hard but I guess its Motherhood :)
Good luch & your not alone in feeling this.
Report This
S.M.
answers from
San Francisco
on
No, you're not being ridiculous! Enjoy all your feelings, including the sinking feeling you get when you realize how fast he's growing. Just keep in mind that although he may not "need you as much" as he grows out of one phase, he will need you just as much, for other reasons, as he goes into the next phase.
My oldest is about to "leave the nest," and I am just astounded at how fast he's grown up, and how the time has flown, and how the time just goes by faster every year. There's always that little bittersweetness in watching them grow up.
Report This
J.K.
answers from
Mansfield
on
yes... I think we all do on some level. I actually cried today because my daughters are turning 6 and 4 tomorrow. The baby turning 4 is the hardest for me. I want her to stay little forever not grow up, but they have to and each new stage of your childs life brings more joy and fulfillment, even if they don't need you as much they still need you. Don't you still need your mom at times? I know I do and so does my husband.
Your not a nutcase. Just a mom who is crazy about her baby and that is ok! However....be careful it doesn't turn into depression.
I'll be thinking of you L.. Hope this helps:)
Report This
B.R.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Welcome to motherhood!!! These mixed feelings are quite normal. I went through it with my three children and now that I'm a grandma who takes care of three little grandchildren on an almost daily basis, I'm going through it again. At this point it's the youngest (a two year old) who is learning to talk well. I hear some of his childish mispronunciations and think "one of these days he's going to be saying that correctly, and I'll sure miss hearing how he says it now." Start a journal and write things down so you can go back and reminisce later. That will be helpful. I write things in emails to send to family memebers and then save a copy of the email until I can go through and record off those cute things.
Report This
C.D.
answers from
Sacramento
on
L.,
As I read your post I started laughing so hard tears came down my face!!! You are awesome!!! What a great new mommy!!! Everything your feeling is what most all moms feel! Just normally cant or don't put it to words. I was mad a God for a week or so because I felt so worried about everything and thought I loved the new baby too much and I knew I was in for a life of fear over anything happening to him...well 4 kids later I just thank God for all of them and especially new moms that can make me smile so BIG knowing I am not the only nutcase mom! Best of luck hon, each day is a brand new gift, just realx and enjoy it!! :o)
Report This
S.D.
answers from
San Francisco
on
L.,
congratulations on your baby boy. you are certainly not alone. I have 3 children my oldest is 13 and my youngest is 20 months. it's amazing how quickly time flies. all I can say is cherish the time you have with him right now and take lots of picture. if you haven't started doing it already write down everything in a baby book. I have done this with all of my kids and it is so fun to look back at the memories. video cameras are great too. I have been very anxious about the fact that my youngest and certainly last child is almost 2 already, but have tried not to take each moment for granted and just cherish it.
enjoy him now because you can't make him stop growing!!
Report This
K.E.
answers from
Louisville
on
You can feed as early as 4 months and USDA and most pediatricians recommend this.If he does well with it then great! If not, you are the mom. Simply wait. With regard to anything else, the fact of the matter is that your child is going to grow up. You don't want to hinder this process and cause any delays because of your anxiety with it. I recommend that you live for the moment with your child. Although we have all been there feeling that our children are growing up too quickly, too much dwelling on that may cause us to miss what is going on with them right now and every second counts for me.
Report This
K.M.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Not a nutcase at all--I think for many of us, parenting is a whole long string of these moments and feelings. When you think about it, it makes sense--after all, our job isn't to take care of a baby forever, it's to raise a new adult to take his/her place in the world. However, we are in love with the child we know right then--we don't necessarily want to see that little one change and move away from us.
All I can say, as the mother of a sixteen-year-old, is that if those feelings help you cherish every moment a little more, they will be doing their job. Childhood flies by, and every day is precious. I still have all those feelings after all these years, and many of my friends--most, really--do too.
Report This
E.M.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Totally normal, as long as you don't actually make him stay in the bassinet until he's 2 :) I remember being sad that my son was getting so big WHILE I WAS STILL PREGNANT! How's that for crazy? I was also devastated the first time he let somebody else rock him to sleep for his nap. Fortunately it turns out that he still needs me quite a bit at 2 1/2. Just enjoy all the little moments, take lots of pictures and journal about all the sweet little baby things. It does go by too fast!
Report This
J.S.
answers from
Sacramento
on
I think those feelings just come with being a mom. I definitely felt that way--especially once we approached the first birthday. I was so sad that my baby was no longer a baby, but my husband reminded me of all the fun things to come (and did I really still want to be spit up and never sleep???) I try to savor the moments when my son wants to be held and cuddle, because they are definitely fewer and father between, but now I try to look forward to each stage. It's so exciting to actually play WITH him and to experience things for the first time through his eyes. Just try to enjoy your little one!
Report This
L.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Hi -Yes you are a great mom for being concerned-but don't be your breastmilk is enough an SHOPULD be the only thing youfeed your baby for the first 6-8 months-I have my third whom is 10 months old just starting to eat any real amounts of food- If you nurse on DEMAND-as he wants you will produce milk-ask any midwife-not your MD - your baby will grow and you can still co sleep- we sidled our crib up to our bed and our baby is right next to us -she mostly sleeps with us still where there is a will there is a way-attachment parenting breeds healthier more independant kis later- enjoy your baby they shouldn't be away in another room ALONE-why id u have ababy than? goo luck lots of blessings---L.
Report This
D.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Hi L.,
I am the mother of 5 and do understand the emotions you are feeling. As you see your baby growing up and soon becoming a bit more independent they seem to not need you the way they do at birth. Just know that you are always going to be needed and wanted and that as each stage happens as part of the progression of your and the childs life. You will have so many joys to encounter over time so you just have to give up the idea that that baby is not a baby anymore and give in to the idea tht this sweetheart will be a wonderful person to brighten your world as the years go by. Nana Glenda
Report This
S.M.
answers from
Stockton
on
Our son is 2 this month and his toddler bed us in our room. You don't have to
move him out of your room. I feel the same as you and I don't want my boy in the next room. Stay true to your feelings and do what you feel is best for your baby and you. We coslept until he was 19 mo and I had many raised eyebrows in my hubbies family. But I wanted my son close. And he transitioned fine and I am sure when we move him to his room he will be fine.
As for the solids and bf. Your milk has enough nutrients that u do not need supplement. Doctors in the US have almost no training in breastfeeding or nutrition - unless they have taken it upon themselves to study it. If you can contact your local La Leche League group and talk to someone there- they are trained. (llli.org to find a leader near you, it is free)
Report This
C.F.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I felt the same way with mine - you are not crazy! This is just part of being a loving mom and hormones definitely play a role!
Report This
V.J.
answers from
San Francisco
on
definately not! most mothers i know have the same feelings at some point. he's your 'baby' and always will be and at times like those it's bitter sweet and i know exactly waht you mean. My boy is 22 months old now and just the other day i was packing away clothes that were too small and felt sad that he was growing up, don't know how i will be when he starts preschool!! Just enjoy every minute!
Report This
D.T.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I have to chuckle because I was the same way. At 4.5 months we put the crib in our room so he would still be near because I was still exclusively breastfeeding and it was easier with night waking. I started him on solids (vegetables first- yams) at 5.5 months. He ended up in the crib (in our room) for naps and co-slept in our bed at night. At 6 months we moved the crib into his own room for naps - he still co-slept with us at 1 year. At that point he wasn't sleeping well-woke all the time to nurse for comfort (teething) so we did a gentle transition (very minimal crying to get him into his own room in his crib at night). Sometimes we would co-sleep for naps but at night he was now in his own bed. We transitioned him to a twin bed on the floor at 22 months and at 2 years he was weaned. You should feel great about providing your son's nourishment, but we are meant to eat solid foods at some point (when teeth come in and digestive system is ready. You can continue to nurse as log as you and he want!
Report This
R.P.
answers from
Sacramento
on
I see you've already gotten a ton of responses, but I just had to add one more! Oh my goodness...you are so normal! I cried (yes, tears down my face) when my first (I have 2 now--a girl who'll be 4 in Feb. and a boy who's 18 months) got her first tooth at 5 months. And I delayed 'real' food until 7 months (with the Dr.'s okay) because I wanted to be all she needed. I did the same with #2. When I finally weaned my first at almost 22 months, I cried like a baby knowing that I would never again have that connection with her (even though I was pregnant with #2 and would soon be nursing him). My second is still nursing at a year and a half and I know I'll cry like a baby again when we're done.
Every milestone (crib, own room, teeth, food, sitting up, crawling, walking, etc.) was bittersweet because it was one more thread of the umbilical cord being cut. True--I am a very sensitive and sentimental person. But hey, my husband loves those traits and I think I cherish more moments in my daily life because I'm really trying to take them all in. Don't change anything--honor your feelings.
I keep trying to figure out how to install a 'pause' button on my children's noses!!! I can't stand that it's going so fast and that our family is now 'complete' (I'm done!) because I know I'll never have that baby stage again. How did I get to be the mom of two toddlers?!? Spend every second you can holding him, rocking him, singing to him, smelling him, gazing into his eyes. Before you know it they're mobile and won't sit still for two seconds. I remember telling my husband that that was part of the reason I nursed longer than most...it was literally the only time of the day I got to hold her and touch her cheek and stroke her soft curls. I cherished that time every night and am so glad I held on to that. Hold on to whatever works for you and your little family.
Bless you and your tender heart...he's one lucky little guy!
Report This
A.S.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Isn't becoming a mom amazing? It totally changed me. Your feelings...completely normal and wonderful. I hope you can find a moms group to connect with and they can remind you. Daddies don't always understand our feelings, and neither do our friends who haven't had kids or even other women from a different generation or background.
Now what do you do with those feelings? You don't have to move your baby to the crib in the other room. You can get a big cradle to put by your bed that will last until he can sit himself up. Or you can use the crib for naps and put baby to bed there until he wakes up or until you bring him to bed with you.
And just because he was able to eat the rice cereal doesn't mean you need to feed him 3 meals a day. In fact, if he isn't grabbing your food and trying to put it in his mouth, you can just keep exclusively nursing even past 6 months old. I followed a friend's experience and waited as long as I could to start table food with my 3rd baby. She had waited until 9 months. Then I just fed baby once a day for quite awhile. We added new food slowly, especially after food reactions with my 1st 2 babies. This way we hardly used any smoothly ground "baby food" and very quickly went to little bits of food that baby could pick up and eat herself.
If you get any flack from Daddy or other family members, just remind them that there are different ways of doing things and you are figuring out what is best for your family.
Happy Mommyhood!
Report This
D.R.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I know exactly what you mean!! I was also sad to start solids with my daughter, I think because in some way it signified that she was starting outgrow her babyhood. We actually waited until she was 6 months old, and would've probably gone longer except that her pediatrician gently told us that it was time. My daughter is turning one in a week, and many times over the past year I've found myself with conflicting feelings - simultaneously wishing she could stay a certain age forever and looking forward to the milestones ahead. I guess the sentiment I'm trying to describe is that each milestone seems to have brought new joy into my life that I could never have imagined before. So enjoy each moment as it happens, and while you may be sad to leave a particular phase behind, know that amazing new experiences are right around the corner!
Report This
M.F.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Hi L.,
I completely understand what you're going through! I was there with my son over the last year. Our son slept in our room for 8 - 9 months, 6 of which were in his own crib. At that point, the move was still hard, but easier to deal with. He's 15 months old now and I'm still breastfeeding at nighttime and naptimes. I'm not ready to quit just yet so am doing what feels right for us.
You're not a nutcase! One thing I found helpful was having friends whose babies are roughly 4 - 6 months older and younger than my son. It got me excited about my son's next stage and made the transition easier.
Good luck!
M.
Report This
E.A.
answers from
San Francisco
on
L.,
you are not being ridiculus! You are a young mother, and you are developing your motherly instinct. It will get stronger and more secure as time goes by and with every additional child.
If you don't want your baby away from you - keep him close! Listen to this instinct, it will help you in your parenting.
Regarding the rice - don't worry, even if you give him a little bit of cereal, or solid foods, he is still going to need your breast milk for a long time. many mommies are still breast feeding at the age of 2 or longer.
All the best!
E. Andrews
Report This
S.B.
answers from
Redding
on
Dear L.,
You aren't being ridiculous.
I felt the same way. While it's true the first year really seems to go by fast, there is still so much to look forward to!
My first baby didn't do anything the way I had planned. As a newborn, I thought she would sleep all the time. She didn't. I thought she would nurse for at least a year. She didn't. I thought she would start crawling at a certain age. She didn't. She was walking at 7 months and never really did crawl. She was tiny and I thought she would be "dainty"....she was a daredevil. Her first word was "Nannie", referring to my mom, so the whole "Grandma" thing went out the window. My mom lost her first name that day. All these years later, everyone calls her Nannie.
With my son, I had the same feelings and he was so completely different from my daughter. He was my mellow baby.
I think it's natural for us to want them to stay little for as long as possible. They're just so darn precious! Take lots of pictures and video. Treasure every day.
Our children do grow and discover and it's as it should be. And, it's such a joy to discover things with them.
I think the first year is the hardest because their growth is so significant and obvious. They don't stay out-of-the-womb size for very long.
Your baby is going to need you for a long, long time.
Take care and enjoy your beautiful baby!
Report This
M.B.
answers from
Sacramento
on
You are not being ridiculous. Every person is different and you never really know what type of mom you'll be. I never thought I'd be a nervous, overprotective mom but I am. I think first time mommyhood is the hardest but don't worry you still have time. I had my son in our room in a cradle until he was 5 months old and the transition to his crib in his own room next to ours with a baby monitor was a good one: we all slept better. The monitor has alerted me every time if he needs me. Like, I said don't worry you still have a lot of time left but enjoy every moment you get to cradle your baby and carry him around. Don't hold him back from the rice cereal if he's ready (I think it might be a bit early for him) as it does satiate his belly. While it's hard to see them grow up, that's what we need for our kids to raise them to be smart, caring, responsible, contributing citizens. But again....you have a lot of time left with your little one. You're not a nutcase...this is the most precious and precarious job on the planet. So enjoy, don't worry, don't beat yourself up and when you and your son are both ready....don't hold him back. Enjoy! : )
Report This
M.B.
answers from
San Francisco
on
I totally understand your feelings, it is natural. Of course you want your child to grow but a small part of you wants him to stay the way he is. I will say this and it will be hard to fathom now until you are able to look back and reflect on it each year but with every new stage and age comes a new thing that you hate to see change but each new and changing this is soo neat that you end up not really missing the old thing. Does that make sense? I hope so. Enjoy, they grow soo fast but the older things are soo neat too. Happy Holiday's.
Report This
H.A.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Oh, I know what you mean!!!
Follow your instincts. It's fine to keep him sleeping close to you, either in his own bed or yours, for as long as you are both comfortable with it. Chances are, he'll hit that clingy 5-6 month old phase soon and you won't have a choice in the matter. Hah!
Same for the feeding. I thought 6 months was the recommended age to start foods, so you sill have a little while to go. Our daughter started on "solids" when she was 6 months and a 8.5 months decided she didn't like being fed so went back to exclusive breastfeeding for another two months! I was beside myself with worry and was annoyed that she wouldn't eat since I went to great lengths to prepare organic food for her several times a day. I only mention this because you never know, he might decide he likes your breastmilk better anyway. :)
I say keep your little boy as close as you can for as long as you can. You can teach him independence and self reliance in other ways, like encouraging him to reach for toys, trying to feed himself (when you do introduce foods), etc. But follow your heart. He is still a little baby. No need to rush things! And he will separate from you when he's ready. It's natural, and you can't stop that if you wanted to!
It is so nice to read your post when so many mommies (me included!!!) are writing about how to get the baby to sleep more on their own, be more independent, etc. :)
Take care, and enjoy your little angel!
H.
Report This
U.S.
answers from
Yuba City
on
Not nuts just normal.
he doesn't need rice cereal until 6 months and his body might not be able to digest grains for a while. Watch for constipation. Fruits and veggies are a good first choice. I started giving mine little taste by letting him suck on a piece of cantaloupe or carrot or apple, etc and those net bag teethers are awesome.
I started putting mine in his crib for naps first and I also started with the crib in our bedroom. The challenge with that is not to get up too quickly to comfort him. I moved my 9 month old out of our bedroom at the end of September. and its hard. I cried. A few weeks later I started putting him to bed awake and he cried and I cried but it only took a couple of nights. He sleeps through the night most nights and wakes up happy. You're not nuts you're a mother and your job is to protect you tiny baby from every thing. How can you possibly do that if he is so far away? You can and he'll be fine and so will you.
Bad news though. in about 3-4 months you will discover that some one took your tiny baby and left you a little boy, an actual kid. It happens over night. Very strange.
Good luck
Report This
A.P.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Cosleepers are great, and bigger than bassinets. I'm all for sleeping with your kid and breastfeeding as long as you are comfortable. Even if you're just cozy feeding in AM and PM with the rest of his meals coming from bottles and rice cereals as you transition, he's still going to get a bit of nunu to keep his immune system up and the closeness between you very tangible.
Report This
M.P.
answers from
San Francisco
on
You might as well get used to the feeling - you'll be having it for the next 40 - 60 years.
But about your specific things. 1) If you don't want to put him in another room then don't. Either put the cr in your room, or put whatever else he might be comfortable sleeping in into your room, or have him sleep in the bed with you. YOU get to choose. Don't get sucked into what YOU think OTHER people think about what should happen. If you want him close then do it. Done.
Food - you have to feed him, so you have to put your personal feelings aside. Start enjoying the process of him gettin gto experience things - that should be able to mostly replace the feeling of loss.
Good luck!
M.
Report This
T.V.
answers from
San Francisco
on
L.,
You don't have to give him any solid food right now. Many people wait a lot longer before they start the solids. (speak with your doc) Separation anxiety is normal for a new parent. Start putting him in the crib during the day for naps. Get yourself use to the idea. What does your husband think?
Blessings....
Report This
W.M.
answers from
Sacramento
on
L.,
We all feel like this as mothers. Sometimes I have even turned around and looked at one of my kids with new eyes and it suddenly dawns on me how much they have grown in the past few weeks even as teenagers. My son's hands are now bigger than mine and his shoe size is 12. His dad is smaller than I am and I am 5'11". My son will soon be the biggest person in the house!!! Amazing how time flies, only yesterday our oldest graduated from high school and now she is on her third year in college. Enjoy the time while it is here, and take lots of pictures, and remember to label them< we have way too many that weren't labeled.
W. M.
Report This
K.H.
answers from
Sacramento
on
Give yourself a break. You sound like a mother who is in love with her baby and really enjoying the infant stage. With my first child I was like this. I thought I was the biggest sap alive. It is normal to feel a little bitter sweet about them growing up. You can always move the crib into your room if you want or you can co-sleep with him if that works for your family. You don't have to do the traditional steps if they don't feel right to you. Also, you can mix breast milk with his ceral and as long as your producing milk, keep giving him as much breast milk as you want. It's the best thing for him even if he likes and wants other things. Enjoy your little guy and motherhood however you can.
Report This
J.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
L.,
You aren't a nutcase- you're a dedicated mom who is loving giving everything she can to her child. Will he need you less over time? Yes and no. Sure children become more independent which is great- that's our job to teach them how to succeed in this world, but no matter how old your child is, they will ALWAYS need you and crave your love.
As for getting used to the changes, it can be a little hard at first. I remember saying, "oh, I love this stage", but then the next one would come along and I would say, "oh, but this stage is really great too". And that's what helped me with some of the transitions. All of the changes can be facinating, thrilling, hysterical or crazy-making (or all of the above). It's really awesome to watch them grow. It really, really is amazing.
There is nothing wrong with how you are feeling so don't forget to allow yourself the space to feel whatever it is you feel. You are a Mom and one that adores her child. I wish every child was so lucky.
Report This
J.S.
answers from
San Francisco
on
No, you're being a mother. And by the way, you don't HAVE to move him away from you. Our 19 months old daughter still sleeps with us in bed. We started co-sleeping at about 4 months once she's outgrown her bassinet. And even though she first really liked rice cereal which we didn't give to her until she was 6 months...right now there's very few foods she actually eats, and i am still breastfeeding her...so he can be a baby for as long as you want him too...do what makes you feel good...may be a sinking feeling is telling you that he's not ready to be moved away or eat solids yet...
-J.
Report This
M.P.
answers from
Modesto
on
Lorraine - it's not true that most Drs won't have you start solids until 6 months. Many I'll have you start at 4. My cousin and I both were told to start our little guys on rice cereal at 4 months then move on to the purées. Weight gain has never been an issue for either of them. Another friend was also told to star her daughter at 4 months. None of us have the same pediatrician either.
Report This
G.B.
answers from
San Francisco
on
Ive read that breastmilk should be the main nutrition for the first year. Dont worry at all about giving cereals yet. In the old days it was not given till about 8 months, and then moms were giving it earlier and the docs said, absolutely dont give it before 6 months, and now people try to give it much earlier than the limit is of 6 months. Your child will be much healthier to stick to breast milk as a main food source for as long as possible.
Report This
G.R.
answers from
Sacramento
on
I get that feeling from time to time. It hits me strongest when I put away clothing he has outgrown. When I find myself tired and just wanting him to sleep or to get off my lap, I remind myself that this stage won't last for long and that I shouldn't wish away these moments. All too soon breastfeeding is over, they don't need you as much. There is freedom with these changes but such sweetness in the moments. Enjoy it and remember it. And welcome the changes.