C.M.
Hi R., thanks for your kind advice to my issue, here is my comment which I hope you will find helpful also: Trust your heart.
I have a basically different view--kids need to be confident that they are loved, whatever the approach. For our (now adult) children it was boundaries, a blend of shared and personal spaces, ability to adapt, and lots of affection. However, I've been around awhile and the one important constant is that parents who do their research to gather the facts, then trust their preferences and instincts (mixed with prayer!), are successful. We implemented many principles of AP, but strongly believe the marriage relationship must be first for the emotional stability and health of the family long term, so I'm not a fan of planning to sleep separately in order to accomodate the kids. However, if your communication with hubby is really good so that you support his needs well and are sensitive to whether or not he is in agreement on any given day on any given process, then you will be observant and your intuition will give you the cues you need to navigate the upcoming changes. Our niece and her husband practice more AP techniques when the kids are going through adjustments, then back off of that when the kids are doing fine. This ebb and flow meets the needs of the whole family well.