My daughter has been going to the same daycare for about 8 months or so, and she seems to love it. She is such a joy to be around most of the time, but when she has a tantrum WATCH OUT! Usually 2 or 3 times a day w/me she has them, but apparently at daycare she is a perfect little angel.
A few days ago when i went to drop her off she threw herself on the floor screaming for apparently no reason. While this seemed like a mild tantrum, compared to what I know she is capable of, her daycare provider seemed suprised. She said she never acted like this during the day...EVER..
My question is, why the tantrums for me and not during daycare? I'm afraid that she may like it too much at daycare and is mad at me for making her leave. I hate to think that she would rather be somewhere else than w/me, but why else such a drastic change in behavior?
Hello H.,
My oldest daughter had tantrums when she was almost 2 years old, I didn't know what to do to make her stop, so, I asked My Mom, She said that If I walk away from her, (that was very hard to do) She will stop because a child is NOT going to like Mommy ignoring her.
I tried it and it worked...She stopped. You gotta let your child know that You are the adult and in charge and Not her.
K. :)
She has the tantrums for you because she knows that you will react to them. She is trying to take advantage of you by having a tantrum.
At daycare, she does what she is told to do and does not have tantrums because they do not allow her to have tantrums. They have made it very clear to her that they are the ones in charge and what they say goes.
When my son tried to have a tantrum with me I went up next to his ear and said in a very forceful but calm voice "STOP IT, NOW!" and he stopped immediatley. I am not saying that will work for you but I do advise that you make sure you make your daughter know that you are the one in charge, not her.
First off , I want to say good luck on the nursing school. My mom just became and LPN in June and has been working a couple months now ... its hard work and I commend u for it .... As for your daughter children are always worse for thier own parents. My daughter doesnt go to daycare and throws tantrums for me ... and not for other people ...so I wouldnt worry about that ,,,, They know how to play us :) We should (i say should because I have a hard time doing it ) ignore them and let them have at it ... they wont cry forever. Good luck K.
H., I know this is going to sound good on one hand and depressing on the other, but she has these tantrums w/ you and not at daycare because she feels comfortable and safe around you. She feels she can truly be herself and express herself whatever way she wants because you love her and she knows it.
My kids went thru this phase and sometimes still act that way. They are great at pre-school, then I pick them up and....wham....they are little terrors. Do they act like this at school? NOOOOO! I get to see their true selves because they feel safe enough to act that way around Mama.
Like I said, it's good on the one hand, because they feel safe. It's horrible on the other because I don't want to deal w/ their tantrums!
I hope this helps you atleast understand what's going on if not how to prevent it.
SHE GET'S AWAY WITH IT WITH YOU. I HAD A DAY CARE FOR 7 YRS AND IT IS WITH MY EXPERIENCE THAT I CAN SAY CHILDREN ACT DIFFERENT AROUND PEOPLE OTHER THAN THAN PARENTS. IT REALLY COULD JUST BE HER AGE. SHE IS FINDING OUT WHO WILL TOLERATE HER AND WHO WONT. I WOULDNT BE WORRIED, UNLESS SHE HURTS HERSELF. IT IS ALL JUST A WAY FOR HER TO FIND HERSELF AND TO LEARN WHAT IS ACCEPTED AND WHAT IS NOT. BRAVO TO YOU FOR ALL YOUR LEARNING.
