Baby Shower Invite

My first thought was did she send the mother to be one? She probably just assumes you'll be there. Unless this is a "father of the baby" baby shower just for his family I don't see why you can't accompany the mother to be.

I am assuming you are not estranged from your daughter. Otherwise there is no question that you should be there. MIL's feelings are not the issue here.

My mother was not invited to my "other" showers:

At work
With couples (our friends)
Nor the one hosted by my Aunt-in-Law

She was invited to the one my sister hosted for me. I guess it never occurred to me she should have been invited to any/all of the others? But I could easily be uninformed about the fiiner points of shower etiquette. = )

I mean heck! The man who impregnated me (that would be my husband) was only invited to one of what I firmly think of as OUR baby showers. I find the exclusion of the father-to-be a far more perplexing situation than a non-invited grandmother-to-be. = )

I think you should go. Maybe she assumes that you'll be coming since you're the mother so she didn't send you an invite. I think it would hurt your daughter if you didn't go.

oh wow.. I just posted a question about the baby shower I'm throwing for my daughter.. you can read those responses if you care to. Different situation but you might enjoy reading. Seems like baby and bridal showers can bring out the best and the worst in people.. LOL
now.. having said that.. I want to say WHAAAT? Why on EARTH would the mother of the mother-to-be NOT be invited to the shower? Everyone else in your family has been invited? I don't get it. Your daughter could easily say very nicely, You know, my mother hasn't received her invitation yet to the shower. Do you think it could have been lost in the mail? Could you give her a call to let her know the details??
Good luck.. you have to go.. this is YOUR DAUGHTER!! GEE!

Wow, that is strange. I would think that you would be invited even if MIL is throwing it for her side only. We did that. My mom threw one for our side and MIL threw one for her side. Both moms (my mom and hubbys mom) were invited to and attended both showers.

Can your daughter just ask her? Or would that cause problems?

Well, I guess that would depend on if your daughter wants you there or not? If you daughter wants you there, then you go. If she doesn't then you don't.

Well since it sounds like your daughter knows about the shower, I think she should mention it to the MIL. Maybe an oversight or they just "assume" you will come because it is your daughter. My friends gave me a surprise bridal shower and NEVER told my mother or MIL (both lived out of town but should not have made a difference). My husband thought they were both invited, but the day came and went and no mom. I was hurt by it and my mom and MIL were DEVASTATED. Needless to say, when my friends planned a surprise baby shower for me, my husband oversaw the guest list and they were BOTH invited and there with bells on.

Ask your daughter to say something. Your are her mom and you should be there!

My goodness, that's awkward. Why hasn't your daughter told her MIL to send you an invitation??

If she is throwing the shower both sides, then she probably assumes you will be there because it's you daughter. If it's not for both sides, then looking at this from a different perspective, maybe she wants this moment to shine & have one on one with your daughter / baby to be. The mother of mommy to be gets to be involved in EVERYTHING because it is her daughter, but the in-law is usually second in everything. Does the MIL only have boys? I don't think there is any disrespect here, it's just one of two things....a. she assumes you will be there because it is your daughter or b. maybe it's as I stated previously. Either way not to be offended and try to see her side of things.

This is odd. I would not take it at face value however, there has to be a misunderstanding. Ask your daughter to find out why you haven't gotten one. If she is uncomfortable doing it then maybe you should call the MIL and politely ask if the invite got lost in the mail. I would only recommend doing that if other family members from your side are attending as well. I say this b/c maybe she thinks someone else is doing a shower too (is anyone else doing a shower too?) and she's only inviting "her" side. If that is not the case, then I can only imagine this is a mistake. It will work out, just ask some questions!

The invite is either lost in the mail, or they gave you a verbal invite or they don't want you there for whatever reason. I would ask your daughter if she wants you there and go based on that.

Ask your daughter what she thinks. She knows her MIL better than you do.

This is really sticky. My son recently got married, the girl and he moved to a town two hours away, (not near either family) and people had a shower there. I was hurt until I found out her mother wasn't invited either. My suggestion is that since your daughter knows about it, ask her to find out what's the deal. Or I'd call and say I don't mean to be rude, but is this shower only for your family? Gosh this can hurt. I am thinking you should be there absolutely. She is your daughter.