Baby Showers

I think Kristen said it best! Have a "welcome home baby" or "meet the baby" party you can host. Call your mom-in-law for a list of contacts and addresses for invitations - I bet that would get her moving!!! Then she'll know that if she doesn't do it, you will :)

I think it may even be better to have a "shower" after the birth than before. By 3 months of age, you have a better idea of what you do need and don't need, so the registry will be easier. And the best part is that everybody gets to see the twins at the party.

You are a very special woman to move so far from friends and family to be near your husbands family. I think that shows alot of courage and dedication to your own, newly formed, family.

I did not read all the other responses, but I would say that every first time mom deserves a nice shower. I was SOOOOO honored to throw my best friend hers. So to me it would not matter that your babies (congrats by the way) are 3 months - you stil should be 'showered' with Love and gifts! :)
Good luck to you!!!

I agree with the other posts regarding a "Meet the Baby" shower. My best friend had one after her son was born and it was really nice, we even were allowed to bring our kids and the older ones (only a couple of them) were allowed to hold the baby - closely monitored of course. I think if you think of it in terms of a "Meet the Baby" event as apposed to a shower then you can maybe become more accepting of it....If she does give you this party, I say enjoy it. Better late then never and it sounds like her intentions are good.

I'm no expert but I personally believe it would be fine to have a shower now. Even if it's only a diaper shower you desreve it! I would much rather go to a shower when the baby has already been born than when the mama is pregnant.
Then I can see and hold the baby!

Heck, have a welcome home babies party and you can host it yourself. Then everyone can see the babies and bring you gifts!

K.

I've heard of "Sip and Sees" where it is a party for the baby and you can visit with the Mommy and see the baby at the same time.

I wouldn't call it a Baby Shower, as the babies are here, so I would call it a Sip and See or a Meet the Babies party, something like that. I've heard of Sip and Sees, however I've never been to one. I don't see any problem with calling them that and having a party to celebrate them and letting everyone enjoy the babies and get to visit with you too.

I liked the idea of the piggy bank and letting everyone donate money for the babies. That was cool and neat idea. You could ask for clothes or toys or go register for more things at Babies R US or somewhere else like Target or other places.

I would appreciate the fact that she is offering to throw a party for you, even though it is late and after the fact. If it happens, just appreciate it and if it doesn't happen, just let it go and give it God and pray about the situation.

Hope it does happen and that you get a wonderful celebration for your twins and for you! C.

H....I can totally understand how you feel! I was in the exact same position as you are (being in his home town with his family and your family no where close by) and pregnant! I am so sorry! It's hard adjusting to a new place and adjusting to marriage and adjusting to being a new mommy...especially with no family support- That is a lot of adjustments to make! Even though, like you I was also willing to make the sacrifice for my wonderful husband...it was still hard at times though...

The only advice I can give you at this point is to take what you can get. I know what it costs to have 1 baby... if his mom is (hopefully) finally coming around then take all the gifts you can get--it will save money in the long run. Does your husband know how you feel? Maybe explain to him how much it would have meant to you to have had a baby shower before the babies were born and how disappointed you were not to have one...and that as grateful as you are that she is considering throwing a baby shower now- you don't want to come across as ungrateful but that you don't want to be disappointed again. Maybe he can talk to his mom and encourage her to follow through this time. Just a thought... Good Luck and God Bless!
A.

I think it would be perfectly fine. I've been to several "sip and sees" as they were called since it was after the baby was born. Sip some wine and see the baby. Hopefully your MIL will pull thru. Good luck with the little ones.

if she does plan a shower for you then i say let her it would be fun & since the babies are already here then everyone will get to see them. my second was born early so he actually got to come to his shower & it was great!

You should have a welcome the babies party. My sister had twins who had to stay in the hospital for almost 6 weeks because of problems they had. We had a welcome party when the pediatrician said the babies could have visitors. They were 3-4 months old. Everyone was able to hold the babies and had a good time. We had sandwiches, chips, and cake and then cleaned up for her. Let your mil know you would love to have her host a celebration, then offer to help her out. Your husband could mention it to his sisters too. Then they could help too. Maybe if you all work together, the party will happen. Don't allow this to become a problem between you and his mother. She will be in your life for a long time. I think you should sit down with your husband and tell him why you feel like you do. He should know that you are disappointed that she said she would do it but then not follow through. At least it would allow you to air what you feel and he will not wonder why you would make a remark like you did.
Do you and your husband attend church? That would be a good place for you to start making friends other than his family. There also might be a Moms of Multiples group in your area. I know there is one in Ft. Worth. You could meet other parents of multiples and make friend there too.Plus they have a great garage sale a couple times each year. We all know how expensive it can get with children.
Good luck. If you need someone to talk to ,you are more than welcome to e-mail me at ____@____.com. M.

Hi H.:

First of all, CONGRATS! Next, it seems most appropriate for your mother in law to not have a shower for you, but since she is offering to do something, I would suggest a "Sip N See." It's a Southern tradition, but very popular. It's basically a shower but it's an opportunity for you to show case your little ones for everyone to see, while invitees normally bring gifts. It's a chance also for her to invite her friends. It's typically done about 3-5 months after the birth of a child..

Hope this helps..

A. P.

When we had our first child we did not want to know the sex of the baby so when my sister wanted to throw me a baby shower I suggested that we do a party after the baby was born. That way I would know what I needed and it would give everyone the chance to meet our new baby. I needed time to adjust to motherhood and I wanted to make sure that my little guy was strong enough to be exposed to so many people at one time so we waited until he was about 8 weeks old or so. We invited both men and women and it turned out wonderfully. My sister had an idea to buy him his first piggy bank for the shower and asked that everyone help fill his first bank. I was expecting people to put in whatever pocket change that they had on them... I was shocked when he received several hundreds of dollars for his piggy bank in addition to all the wonderful gifts he received. Anyway, my point is it doesn't matter whether you have the shower before they arrive or when they're 3 months old. The whole point is to celebrate their birth so I would definately let your MIL throw the party. AND ENJOY EVERY MINUTE OF IT!

Have a "Sip and See" shower...it is a shower that is given after the baby or babies in your case are born. You come "sip" and "see" babies. It is meant to be casual and people still bring gifts. Here's some invite sayings...

Tiny hands, tiny feet,
There is someone new for you to meet!
Join us for a sip and see
honoring H.
and her new babies
xxxx & xxxx

It will be double the pleasure
and double the fun,
because H. had more than one!
Join us for a Sip and See
in honor of H. and her new twins

On a seperate note, I commmend you for being so willing to move and live where your husband wants to and be close to his family. But you shouldn't feel like they are your only friends...get involved in some mom groups in your area or support groups for multiples just so you can meet other moms and start getting some friends. They can't replace the ones you have but it will make the transition easier and give you some good moms to have playdates with. I hope you do have the Sip and See...all new moms deserve a shower!!! : )

For a long time growing up my mother always went to baby showers after the babies were born so that everyone could see them, hold them, and ohh and ahh over them. Have it at your house and call it a "Meet the New Additions Celebration" Don't ask for gifts, but register at a few places and include that in the invitation, then ask your mother-in-law if there is anyone she'd like to invite that she knows, along with your sister-in-laws, give them the date and either give them invitations to send out or the information and ask one to come up with an invitation so that you can organize the rest. I bet you will be surprised to see them step up to the plate and take on some resposibilities for the party, you may just have to get things turning and plan a sure enough date and time. Go fot it girl, you having nothing to lose, just something to gain!!!