Bad Restaurant Experience-do I Say More?

i'm pissed on your behalf. like you, i've had too much experience in the restaurant business to be okay with this.

under certain circumstances (if i were a regular, if i knew the owner or manager) i might complain directly. certainly if anyone had approached me, as one might expect in an expensive trendy restaurant, and asked if things were going well, i'd take advantage of the opportunity to let them know.

but what i would certainly do is leave an online review at YELP and tripadvisor. and i check reviews before i go to a fancy restaurant. one time i did have a manager read a review after a negative experience and apologize. because of this i did go back, and while it's still not a favorite, i've never again had a poor experience there.

and what i would NOT do is give them another chance unless they do something to earn it. obviously that won't happen unless you communicate your dissatisfaction in some way, so if you want to go back, do pick a platform. but for the most part i figure there's always somebody else who actually wants my business badly enough to work for it, and i go find them.
khairete
S.

If it were me, the part that I would find annoying is that you kept complaining to the server, yet they didn't go up with your complaints (to the manager or owner). That's wrong, isn't it?

If this was your restaurant, and patrons kept complaining to the server, would you not want to know?

I wouldn't get into all the specifics. I would say that you made numerous complaints during the course of the meal and they weren't resolved to your satisfaction. To me, that's the bigger issue.

How would you want to hear this info? A phone call, an email or a bad review? I'd approach it from that perspective.

I would not expect much of anything from the owner even if you do log a complaint now therefore I wouldn't bother and I would probably never go back to that restaurant again.

My husband and I enjoy fine dining too but not on New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day, or Mother's Day etc. we too have found that the food tends to be mediocre due to sitting too long, the service is slow and often the prices are higher for less of a selection.

I get your expectations since you are in the same industry. I'd probably appreciate the dining experience at your establishment.

It was NYE and not a typical evening. Our personal experience was to steer away from special event dining because typically, it's s good night of high stress to make things be off. We do enjoy great restaurants and spend a good chunk of money for a great meal and service.

However, I see an issue if you eat the food and then complain. Do you comp a meal if some eats the steak then complains? The timing for complaining should be at the first bite of food.

It sounds like you made concerns known to the server during the dinner.

I think 3 days is late to expect a discount or comped meal but ok to convey your personal experience to the owner if you know them.

I do use media such as FB and Yelp to let people know of my experience somewhere, especially great service which is important to me.

On a personal note, I appreciate constructive criticism which enables me to improve myself.

I would write to the owner. Since you know him socially and are in a small community, I think you should approach this from a "I think you should know, so that this doesn't happen again next time you have a special occasion, and because I don't want you to lose customers" point of view.

After all, if it were your restaurant and on a busy night, unhappy customers slipped by without anyone calling your attention to it, wouldn't you want to know?

And I do disagree with your assessment that the server deserved a good tip. When you complained and he failed to bring the issues to the attention of the owner, he became part of the problem. The owner can't fix problems he doesn't know about.

I would contact them but focus the discussion pretty tightly on the timing issues. You booked a 9:00 seating and waited 45 minutes before the FIRST course appeared, and that is not acceptable, especially if this is a fixed menu; it's not like they had to take an order and then make your special, from-scratch version,, is that correct? You ate from a fixed menu? That 45-minute wait to me would indicate real issues in the kitchen. Maybe they overbooked the earlier seating and were out of things by the 9:00 seating. Bad form.

I would not mention the portion sizes because in any fancy place with a seven-course meal, they're going to give small portions and that would be expected. The cold and badly cooked food etc. is bad but it should have been dealt with at the time and on the spot. I'd focus on the timing issues but would not ask for or expect a comped meal after the fact.

You already did the best you could by telling the server not to give the kitchen any portion of the tip (I never heard of that but since you're in the business I'm figuring it's the done thing?). Unfortunately I would bet the server had no choice but to share out the tip; still, you at least let the server know where you thought the problem lay.

I also would not mention the owner's hovering presence. I agree, it's not professional, but it's done now.

A short e-mail noting that three days later you're getting in touch because you would like to give them feedback they can use in the future -- that's the way to go. And focus it on the timing issues, especially the initial 45-minute wait, especially if the menu was fixed and they weren't creating an individual dish for you on each course.

I would not mention that you are in the restaurant business though the owner will know that if he knows your names and your business. But if you present it as "We're in the business too," he may dismiss your complaints as merely nitpicking from other restaurateurs rather than complaints from customers.

And I would not go back.

ETA:

I made no assumptions. Did you tell the restaurant you intended to be gone in 2 hours? If not? How is this their fault?

And yes - it IS five days later - SATURDAY, SUNDAY, MONDAY, TUESDAY, WEDNESDAY....I count FIVE - don't you?

So what if YOU don't treat a guest this way - it's NOT YOUR RESTAURANT!!! You should have complained THAT NIGHT. To wait DAYS is WRONG.
___________________

Trees,

What exactly do you want to complain about? Everything or just particulars?

If the food was cold? You should have said something RIGHT THEN AND THERE. As a business owner, you know the importance of properly cooked food.

The problem is you are in the field and know what YOU do and what you expect of others. You should have stepped up right then and said something about the food.

The "late" seating - you chose the time, right? Two hours isn't really enough for a 7 course meal! You're shoving food down your throat instead of enjoying it.

We don't go out on New Year's eve. Not just because of crazy people but other people who are working are trying to get home too.

Being a restaurant owner and going out to eat is like a doctor going to another doctor. It just doesn't work out well because YOUR expectations and standards are most likely going to be different that what someone else's is. And you experienced this.

I've never had an owner stand in a corner of a restaurant. I've always seen them OUT and about - talking with customers, asking questions.

You should have said something that night. It's now 5 days later and you want to complain? What are you expecting to happen with the complaint? The food should have been sent back that night to be prepared properly.

You set the time to come in and, in my opinion, didn't leave enough time for a 7 course meal if you had somewhere else to be by 11PM. Errors were made on both parts. The food issue should have been addressed that night. His standing in the corner? It's HIS place. That's how he wants to do it. Different person. Different standards.

Before you complain - think about what you are trying to accomplish. If it's constructive criticism? It should have been done that night.

I would just write a review on Yelp and never return. I would think a written review on Yelp for all to see would have a greater effect than even speaking to the owners in person.

I was at a similar dinner this New Years Eve (although in NYC it was $250++). My 9:45 seating was specifically intended to include midnight, ended around 12:45. So, with your 9pm seating, I do think you should have TOLD someone about your desired departure time - like you would if you had to get to a show, etc. As others have said, it sounds like a pretty normal leisurely pace. (I've been to Per Se, that meal took 5.5 hours.)

"Small portions" to me sounds like a normal tasting menu.

If the food was not prepared correctly, you should have pointed it out at that time.

For now - I think - write it off as a loss, speak with your feet, don't go back. Today is the 4th day out since your dinner, though, so if you do want compensation, don't wait much longer.

I think it depends on what you want from this action. Do you want your money back? Do you want the chef to know how under par he is? What do you want?

Then you have to address it that way.

We went to a very nice place like you've mentioned.

It was $40 per person. It was several courses too.

First, I love deviled eggs and the ones they made were completely different than anything I've ever eaten. I could have made a meal out of them alone.

The pork, OH MY GOD!!!, I wanted to grab everyone's pork and gobble it down. It was like eating a chicken leg in size and shape and bone in it. Very much an appetizer sort of thing.

Second, then we had soup, one of the guys at our table ate everyone's who didn't want theirs. It was just delicious.

Third, salad in a huge bowl with all sorts of strange things in it. There wasn't a single leaf left when we'd passed the bowl around the second time.

Fourth, the steak? It was cold and I did NOT like it. I brought it home with me and my hubby ate it the next day but I thought it was awful. The potatoes? The staff was bringing out more of them because they were so very very good.

Then finally dessert came and I was just too full to eat a single bite. I gave it to a lady sitting across from me.

I messaged you a copy of the menu for the evening. I didn't want to share it publicly.

If I had wanted to I could have complained about the steak. It was awful. But I had so much other food that I didn't think it had much negative weight when compared. The chef might have had a bad night or the staff didn't get it to us on time.

In your case your whole meal was bad and you were not treated with the respect you deserve as a customer and even worse as possible competition to some extent.

I would probably talk to the guy next time you see him and maybe offer him a suggestion or two. So that other guests might not have to sit by a door or have cold food or be overlooked for their rightful turn at getting food.

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I agree with marla G. When I had a significant other, we used to fight the crowds at restaurants for Valentine's Day. I cannot even count the amount of hours spent in frustration going down a line of favorite dinner spots by calling each one to see if they could accept our reservation, before being told they were booked 3+ months in advance. Ugh! If we were lucky enough to eventually find a place, it would turn into a 2+ hour dining ordeal due to slow service, and a bill that was twice as high or higher than dinner would be on a normal day, and for what? We learned our lesson and would go out for V-Day dinner a week before, or a few days before, and saved ourselves a lot of money and frustration. Same with NYE dinners. Overpriced, and overrated just because of the date.

Now my mom and I go all out and buy something special to eat at her house, and save ourselves a lot of money for NYE. Even when we splurge, it's still 50% less than we'd pay for such a meal, or even for a mediocre meal, on the 31st just because it's NYE. I don't enjoy dressing up anyway, so it really saves me more than just the frustration of sitting and trying to flag down the waiter for a drink refill or being served cold food. That being said, while large crowds, slow service, and other issues are standard on NYE, it doesn't mean you don't have a right to complain when others who arrived later and had no reservation are given priority over you.

I am a Yelp Elite reviewer, and have been reviewing establishments for years. I can tell you that 95% of the time, restaurant owners/managers will contact me after a poor review asking how they can remedy my situation and if the review is positive, many times, they will send me a personal note privately or post something to my review to thank me and welcome me back. If my review was negative, they offer free meals, a discount, etc., just to make up for their poor service or poor dining experience because they care, so I echo what others have said about posting a Yelp review.

If the owner really DOES care about his customer's experiences and about his establishment, he WILL check Yelp reviews and have a Yelp account that notifies him every time someone posts a review so that he can either thank the person for the glowing review, or address the poor review publicly with an offer to contact him privately and repair your poor image of them. Not just that, but it shows he is in touch with customers and really does care to make them happy and accept negative criticism. That is the only way he can fix things, if someone is honest and states the good with the bad and the owner is given a chance to fix the bad once it is brought to his attention.

We don't go out for NYE, Valentines, Mother's Day or Father's Day. It is crazy and generally people are jerks.

I have been to several of these types of dinners recently. 20 minutes is about right between courses. You don't want to choke the food down. I think your expectations were very high and they were not met. Honestly, $65 per person is a deal. There was a dinner like this at a restaurant in The Woodlands and the fee was $140 per person. My husband was out of town so we didn't do it. Lots of wine and yummy food was on the list. I was disappointed we couldn't go.

I would have sent the cold food back immediately. I have done that before. If I am paying money for hot food, I want hot food. I think you could have asked for the server to bring the Manager over and addressed issues then.

Email the owner with comments regarding the length you had to wait (which was ridiculous) and the temp of the food. I think everything else is just filler. Don't expect being comped several days later. My guess, you probably won't hear from the Manager/Owner. I would also put a yelp review up as well. I would then let this go.

You say you took the 9:00 seating, what time was the other seating? You have gone on and on about how you are in the restaurant business so you know how all this works. You didn't know the time between the two seatings is pretty much how long you should expect to stay?

I have been to many multi course dinners, they are always long, they are meant to be long. I would actually be pissed if I only had 20 minutes between courses. That would not give us much time to talk, just be tossing food down our throats. What is the point of trying all those courses if you are stopping, talking about the food, sharing your choice with others.

Other than the cold food your complaints seem nit picky. In your place I would have understood that they can't seat me until the people using the table leave, expected a long meal, I would have sent the cold food back, and wouldn't be in your place three days later.

I'm having to lodge a letter of complaint right now and asked a friend (who works in HR) what the most effective method of communicating the issues at hand would be. She stated "simply 'this is the effect so and so's actions had' and then a solution-oriented suggestion". This is not regarding a restaurant visit, quite more serious, in fact, but the method of delivery should be the same: if you care enough to want to send something, pare it down to the basics and give some constructive feedback.

Like others, we don't go out to Prix Fixe/ special dinners like this for the reasons you describe. Industry insiders (even in Waiter Rant) will tell you that those are the moneymaker nights but the food is usually at its worst. I'd chalk it up to 'live and learn'...but that's just me.

If the server was aware and didn't let the manager know...perhaps it is because the kitchen's issues are taken out on the servers or they are reprimanded in some way OR the server did tell the manager and the manager/owner is really really bad or just didn't care due to it being New Years Eve figuring most of the customers were one time special event diners that wouldn't return anyways.

At this point three days later let it go...chalk it up to a very bad night out and don't book there again. Unless you are curious enough to see if a typical night there is the same as NYE.

You could always leave a comment on Yelp, but you know how much that can haunt a business for years...eh, I would let it go.

New years eve in a restaurant is always too busy for much customer satusfaction. You were seated according to their pla which was made in order to seat diners quickly. The owner was at kitchen door to be able to influence employees to keep dining a somewhat good experience. I never expect as good of service during holidays asduring regular nights. I suggest you were more aware of glitches because dining on New years.was a new experience and because, as a restaurant owner you knew how the service should be.

Does this restaurant usually have 2 seatings and/or this many diners? If not, they lack experience with New Years Eve dining. Even if they've had this format before, each year is different. There are likely different employees as well as new ones hired for the occasion.

I would' t mention it, especially since you know the owner.

I would have absolutely asked for some kind of compensation (apology, discount, something). I think you owe it to the owner to let him know what your experience was there...otherwise he may not know and has no opportunity to correct it.

I say yes, you should contact them. However, I also contact people when service is above and beyond. So I think on either end you should.

$65 is very cheap for 7 course meal on NYE. So you got what you paid for. And if you saw the owner just standing there, why didn't you go over and talk to him or motion to him to come to you? You know him a little already. He should know of you too then so doesn't seem to care. At this point I wouldn't bother. I'd have left the last course too to make the next engagement since you were already getting a great deal on the meal. Maybe they thought people who signed up for the late seating actually wanted to be there for the midnight toast. If I signed up for 7 courses on NYE, I'd assume it would be really long. We go to 3 course dinners that take hours. They are way more than $65 per head but as others said, some people get mad if they're rushed and feel they are paying for a long experience.

There are 2 nights of the year that we never go out to a restaurant and one is Valentine's Day and the other is New Year's Eve. These are 2 crazy nights to dine out for many of the reasons that you have outlined above. The restaurants are overwhelmed and unable to handle being slammed on nights like these. Good nights to stay home. I wouldn't waste my time trying to convince an obviously clueless manager of your disappointing evening but chalk it up to experience and lesson learned.

I think I would also have been frustrated by cold or unappetizing food, comments to the waitress, and no attention by the owner. I also think it's easy to spend a whole night frustrated, and then simmer for a few days trying to decide if it's worth addressing. As for me, I think it's still worth a phone call directly to the owner, sharing your lack of enjoyment of the evening. Let her ask you what you would like done about it. If she does not, the next step is an on-line review. Good luck!

What does it hurt to complain? Do it! The owner needs to know. More than anything, don't go back.

I would have definitely complained directly to the owner especially since he was standing right there in plain sight. I would explain it wasn't our server's fault. Then I would not have sat down with the server. Not their fault and sitting them down w/you takes their time up and away from other guests. Since you own a restaurant you know the secrets to run that type of business. I would understand one thing.....serving that many people on NYE is a definite challenge. I would send a letter to the owner outlining all of the things that went wrong. End it with while I know it was New Year's Eve, everyone comes to expect much more from such a high end restaurant charging expensive premiums. You could always give that restaurant another try but don't ever do it on a special night like Valentine's etc.

I think that they were busy that evening. However, that is not really an excuse for the type of service you received. I would call and speak to them. I don't know if I would be hateful and rude, just honest.