Bringing Sick Baby to Family Gathering...

see the problem is everyone has a cold right now. i could see the flu but in the winter everyone has a cold. i allow my kid around anyone who is ill as long as they dont have an active fever or vomiting and honestly my 3 year old has been sick MAYBE as many fingers on ONE hand her entire life and NEVER to the point she needed to see a doctor ....the most germaphobic people i know have the sickest kids. Also babies that are teething will have runny noses and with cough on the excess mucus that they swallow down so whose to saty she wasnt teething? maybe she went to doc and got cleared?

Man do I HATE it when people take their sick kids out to getherings and say, "colds are everywhere!" SO WHAT? That doesn't mean you have to knowingly spread the germs!
You are a better person than me because I would have said something. I would have limited the time my kids had with the cousin, we would have constantly been washing hands, I would not have touched the baby (38 weeks prego!) and I would have said something to the mama about bringing her sick baby.
When my son goes to preschool and there is some kid hacking, sniffing, and blowing his nose I can't help but glare at the mama because I KNOW my kid is gonna get it too. So disrespectful.
L.

I totally agree with you. I think it is disgustingly selfish to bring yourself or your kids sick anywhere. I mean, poor baby, I am sure she/he would have been more comfortable at home anyway. What do the parents care, there kid is already sick!!!! This is my absolute pet peeve. My SIL came to us for christmas sick and we have a five week old! Are you kidding. I knew right away when she claimed that she was just visiting someone with dry heat. Yeah, ok, the hacking couch, runny nose and wet eyes were from that . AHHHHH. I am still obviously very upset by this. I mean grow up and stay home when you are sick. BS that colds are everywhere...they are everywhere because people stop caring and being considerate once their family is already impacted. Grrrrr....

When it comes to the holidays that only come once a year it's a little hard not to get exposed to a drunk relative, a rude relative or a sick relative. It just goes with the whole "visiting" thing.
Germs are everywhere anyway. If we dont get exposed to someone knowingly we will get exposed unknowingly. It's just the way the world goes round.
Colds are colds, we all get them and they will never, ever go away (are we all not still waiting for the cure for the common cold? We've been waiting for centuries).
If we have a choice we don't usually take a sick kid anywhere, mostly because the sick child needs to be tended to and helped to heal. Sometimes we just dont have that choice tho.
It's a forgivable sin.

Amen sister! Yeah, germs are everywhere but I would rather a shower of random germs than the blast furnace of a hacking person at a family gathering.

People are so inconsiderate. My kids have type 1 diabetes so I am particularly sensitive about this. Yes, they get sick, I can deal with that. BUT.....the amount of people who think it's perfectly okay to go around lavishing their strep throat, vomiting, pneumonia, hacking coughs, fevers, etc. is STAGGERING!
So, people think it's not a big deal, but what is mild for most equates to a hospital stay for us.
Personally, I think it's a sense of entitlement that brings people to the conclusion that their kids (or their own) sickness is not a reason for THEM to miss out on any fun.

So, the moral of the story is that we can't avoid germs but we CAN avoid getting needlessly sick from people who refuse to deny themselves an outing when they are obviously sick.

My sister had a horrible experience. She and her family went on a camping trip with 4 other families. One child was throwing up before arriving at the campsite and her parents decided that they would miss out on too much fun if they went home so they stayed and EVERY single kid and several adults had violent vomiting and diarrhea as a result.
People need to get a clue!

I usually take into account the same philosophy that the schools do, which is if they do not have diarrhea, vomiting or fever then they can go to school. Colds this time of year is VERY typical and I am sure if everyone skipped the Christmas celebration due to a cough and runny nose we all would miss out on a lot.

I probably would have brought my baby, but would have warned everyone ahead of time. In fact, we host Christmas Eve every year and this year my son and daughter had the Rhodovirus. I called everyone and warned them of what was going on, the virus is not airborne and typically does not spread to anyone over 5, everyone just needs to be sure to wash their hands. I offered to not have the event to the dismay of my three kids but every person invited decided to come anyways.

Maybe a good way for this mother to handle the sick baby situation is to call everyone and let them know. You could have had the opportunity to warn your kids and tell them how to avoid getting it when playing with the baby. In short, I wouldn't put too much more energy into it than that, your kids are exposed to WAY more at school and the grocery store than any little baby could pass to them.

Good luck and HAPPY HOLIDAYS! = )

i think an infant is easier to "control" than a mobile kid. The difference is, your kids could have stayed away from the baby and everyone could have washed their hands a lot more. Putting healthy kids literally in the face of a sneezy coughing baby/child/adult is just asking for it a lot more than being in the same room. However, those adults who are handling the sick infant should not be grabbing everyone else by the face,shaking their hands (the worst) and kissing them! Taking "infected" hands and then touching our own mouths, noses and eyes is the biggest problem - those germs just love our soft and porous mucus membranes, and that's how they take route!

Handwashing is extremely important but antibacterial soap is a bad idea, say the experts. It's the lather and the rubbing and the TIME spent washing, rather than a soap that only kills certain bacteria (but not one single cold virus) and which helps to breed "super-bugs" that are more resistant to treatment. So teach your kids - and yourself - to wash their hands without the water running constantly, to rub and make bubbles, while singing the Happy Birthday song or the ABC song TWICE. Then turn on the water and rinse.

I also disagree that exposing kids to germs is the best way to strengthen their immune systems. Yes, we produce antibodies when exposed to any germ, but there are much better ways to strengthen the immune system so that those germs don't take root! With our food system completely compromised, and our fruits/veggies nutrient-deprived up to 40% from a generation ago, we can't get proper nourishment through our diet alone, even if we eat "right". As a trained nutritional consultant, I work constantly with people (for no fee) to help them with this.

You would do the right thing if you knew your baby was sick, but I am sure the mother didn't sit down and plot this all out to destroy the world. Perhaps baby wasn't even sick when they left. That whole chain of events can happen even if you walk into a grocery store, school, on a playground, etc. It just so happens to be a baby in a specified situation where you were invited. Forgive her.

If my kids have a cold, I still take them places. Colds are everywhere. If you don't want your kids exposed to germs, then you have to keep them in a bubble. Good handwashing is key to keep the spread of germs to a minimum. If I kept my kids home from every thing when they had colds, we'd never go anywhere.

I'm in total agreement with you. It's one thing if baby has a runny nose and sneezes once in a while. But it sounds like this poor thing was completely sick and most likely uncomfortable. My frustration with this type of situation is not only the disrespect for possible exposing other children to illness, but wouldn't that poor sweet baby have been more comfortable at home - resting?

And as far as the daycare situation..don't get me started. I know for a fact some Mom's load their kids upon Motrin so they can at least get 1/2 a day of work in. I get it, I have three small children (age 5 and under) and work full time, but you've got to do the right thing. I feel sorry for the kids...I even went as far to nonchalantly say to one Mom " wow, looks like he should be back home in bed". Didn't do any good, but made me feel better. Good luck!

I think its fine as long as they tell everyone and no one plays with the baby. We use museum rules for sick babies, look but dont touch.

But the daycare thing is out of line. We had a lady bring her sick kid to daycare, knowing he threw up earlier, but not telling the daycare lady. Who's 4 kids and the 2 she watched all came down with rotavirus, and right before she was scheduled to take them to disney! I hate those inconsiderate parents. It's one thing if its a little runny nose or something, but you know when your kid is really sick.

HA, some women just don't care. I had a mother just 2 weeks before christmas dope her child up at home then bring her to daycare sick. After 2 hours of being here the child was vomitting all over the place, I call the mother and it takes another 2 hours for someone to pick up the child. I ended up sick all the other children and my DH, needless to say because of one Rude parent I lost over $1100. No some people don't take in consideration others or what could happen. Just let me say these are the same people who would have a FIT if the situation was reversed.

I understand how you feel. I would be annoyed too. I would have said, upon arriving, "oh my, your little one is sick, how sad, I guess we'll be leaving, sorry everyone, let us know when you guys want to get together again".

I gave up seeing all seven of my grandkids yesterday. My granddaughter had been sick during the week but was on the mend. I came down with it and it was nearly the flu. I ended up in the ER and eventually ran a fever. My 4 yr. old grandson started having a runny nose on Saturday evening and I decided that with everything going on I just could not expose everyone else to what we had.

To set the scene, my daughter is currently in rehab. She has 7 children and none of them are in her custody. She has the new baby living with her but he is in state custody. The oldest is being adopted by my ex, the next grandson has lived with him since birth, the next two live with me, and the next two are adopted by their foster family.

So, for me not to go to a a family Christmas gathering that coordinated 3-4 families being free and traveling, is a BIG BIG deal. But I would not expose them to getting sick.

OH, I so hear you on this one. My SIL has done this to us almost every year, bring a sick child to Christmas and our child ends up getting it. Last year she even showed up herself after being home in bed for three days with the flu!! I point blank said to my MIL the day before our celebration: "She's going to stay HOME with the flu, right??!" Um, no, she dragged herself out of bed and showed up, ill! One year her baby was very ill with a sinus infection and nasty cold and she was slobbering all over herself and my SIL was holding her up to my daughter and putting her wet, slobbery mucuousy face all over our daughter's face and I almost went ballistic inside my head!!! It took all my might to say in an even tone, "Please x, don't do that." It is unbelievable frustrating as I would never dream of bringing a child in the throes of an illness to a party, etc. but I've found that others aren't so inclined.

Unless the host and hostess have a house-rule about sick visitors (like a daycare or school does) then I guess it is fine to bring a sick child. Though it might have been nice if they could've let you know so you could've made a decision not to attend.

If the event is a simple one (not a big deal one likfe Christmas), then yes...I can definitely see that asking others to keep their very sick children at home might be reasonable (minor illness shouldn't be a factor).

Another reason that sick children should not attend a family event is if there is another attendee who is immuno-compromised. Otherwise, healthy people get colds from anywhere and the very best thing we can do (outside of living in a bubble) is to wash our hands thoroughly and frequently and maintain a healthy diet.

Instead of blaming the other parents, you should be angry with yourself for going to the event in the first place (knowing that children will be attending) or for not leaving the party when you noticed that the baby had a cold! You are responsible for your children and your inaction....not anyone else!

That is RIGHT! Our niece kept home one sick child, even though MIL tried to force her to come. I made sure to thank her on the phone in front of everyone because we don't need the flu(especially with a hubby who is disabled). Of course, her other child got ill at the party so we all caught it anyway.
Had they warned us before we traveled there, we could not have gone at all. Luckily, we had the flu shots so it was mild. SELFISH and INCONSIDERATE is what I call it.

Unless my daughter is miserably sick I still take her places. Usually if she is not so sick that she will stay in bed, she can still go.
Germs are everywhere and most infections are spread before the carrier even exhibits ANY symptoms...
Now that said I usually will avoid places that have a lot of kids running around when DD is sick - but family gatherings... in our family nobody is being particularly germophobe.

i agree with you. I take care of my Mom and I make sure I tell everyone who comes over. If you sick do not come here. She cannot be around anyone with a cold.

It is rude depending on what is wrong and if they are contagious. Sometimes kids sound worse than they are and are not contagious...example, I get bronchitis almost every year. As a child it was absolutely EVERY year and long after I was better, the cough lingered. I was not contagious but the cough was horrible and constant.

If the child is contagious and/or aren't already treated to know what is wrong, they should let the host know that their child is sick and they will be staying home.