Child Left in Drenched Wet Dress All Morning @ Private preK School.

Eh, wouldn't be a big deal to me. It's only second day, jeesh! I suppose if it or something like it happens EVERYDAY for weeks. Managing even just 6 4 year olds is not an exacting science. There'd have to other screaming problems in order for this to really bother me.

:)

(If you need a meeting with the principal for a WET DRESS, you'll have to be calling in the MARINES everyday in middle school!)

i would think she didn't tell because she didn't want to get in trouble. I would talk with her about listening and also speaking up for herself.

edited: wow if you let her know you are unhappy with the teachers , shes going to be a smartie and use that whenever she doesn;t get her way, also scheduling a meeting seems crazy, theres no way you can inspect each kid, and if it wasn't all day in a wet dress maybe she learned her lesson to not play in the water?

Drenched, you mean?

She had an extra change of clothes? Couldn't she have changed? I think at that age she should know she is wet and to change her clothes if she is uncomfortable.

EDIT: Actually, your daughter was probably up and down that slide in less than two minutes! Seriously. You scheduled a meeting with the principal because your daughter did something she was told not to do and suffered the consequence of that choice? Oh mama... it's going to be a long year for you if you think the teachers are going to hawk over your child!
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Well... at her age, she should have told the teacher if she was uncomfortable. She also should have known what would happen if she slid down a wet slide- especially after being told not to!

The teacher isn't touching your daughter's back, so unless it was visibly wet or she was dripping all over the floor, she wouldn't have known. You only realized it b/c you hugged her!

She was told not to go on the slide and she did... she suffered the natural consequences of doing what she was told not to do.
I would not be unhappy with the teacher.
I would ask my daughter what she learned from the experience....
LBC

First of all Mom CALM DOWN--:-) geesh so she got wet -- she won't melt or get sick.

I know how hard this is but you can't keep them babies forever. She is like a little bird and this is her first chance to try her wings. She won't really fly for another 14 years but she has to keep trying. She is the one who didn't listen--she went down the slide when she was told not to--hopefully lesson learned -- when teacher tells me not to do something maybe I should listen. Instead of blaming the teacher, remind your daughter she has to do as she is told to do.

She has to start owning her decisions now. If you start to blame others for her mistakes now, what will you do a few years from now and she for instance gets caught shoplifting a pack of gum? Would you blame the store because the gum was in easy reach? Or she doesn't make the team and you blame the coach because coach thinks girls with (pick hair color) shouldn't play, or would you remind her that if she wants to be on the team she needs to practice and improve her skills? Now is when she learns to own her decisions.

The teacher said "Don't go down the slide" . She went down the slide and got wet -- Who's at fault? Not the teacher.

I would have to answer that going on the slide when told not to results in a wet dress, and natural consequences. I don't think it had anything to do with your child not being supervised, I believe it was upsetting to you because her dress was wet.

I would talk to my daughter about following directions and would NOT expect the teacher to eagle-eye every student every minute.

Wet dress, not that big of deal...not following directions, big deal.

your daughters dress was drenched? as in wet?

at almost 5 your daughter should be able to state her dress is wet. ESPECIALLY if you have a change of clothes at school for her...

I would be upset that my child didn't listen to the teacher about NOT going down the wet slide...so in my opinion, it's NOT the teacher's fault..your daughter didn't listen.

so yeah - your expectations are too high for the teacher...your daughter needs to learn to speak up. If she spoke up and the teacher poo-poo'ed - her than YEAH - I would not be happy.

Have a talk with the teacher and your daughter...communication is key.

Your daughter did exactly what the teacher told the entire class not to do. The slide is wet, so do not play on the slide and yet ONLY your daughter did not follow directions? Hmmmm..

Mom you need to get on board with what is going on.. Daughter knew she was responsible for getting her dress wet and did not want to tell teacher because she knew she had not followed directions.

You making a big deal over the wet dress has also made daughter feel like she would rather not talk about her not following directions than admitting it was her own fault.

Step back and now decide who you should be talking to.

I guess I would expect my son (also 4.5) to tell the teacher if he had gotten very wet. I wouldn't stress too much about it, but use it as a learning experience for your daughter. She will need to know when to speak up if she needs help with something, like changing her clothes. Also try to keep in mind that the begining of the year is stressful to the teachers too, as they are trying to get all the kids to fall in line and act appropriately.

Your expectations for the teacher may be too high, but perhpas your expectations for your daughter could be a bit higher.

ETA: This is pre-K, not daycare, so the the kids should be working towards autonomy.

ETA2: Wow, I don't think this situation warrants a meeting with the teacher and principal. It is only the 2nd day of school!! Give her a break and work on your daughter's listening skills! (Sorry, former teacher here.) My son is at pre-K right now, and I know he still has issues listening to directions, and that is not the teacher's fault. It is a family problem that we have to continue working on at home. I would never blame the teacher if my son did something similar to what your daughter did.

I'd only be upset if my daughter spoke up and asked the teacher to put on her back up dress and the teacher refused her. Otherwise, I wouldn't be upset at all. Maybe your DD didn't speak up because she knew she wasn't supposed to use the slide. Especially on just the second day for her, I would expect her to be very nervous telling the teacher about that if she warned them not to slide. Maybe she didn't want anyone to think she accidently wet herself by calling attention with a change of clothes. Maybe it just didn't bother her to have partially wet clothes. I don't think it is that unusual at all the teacher didn't notice just the back of her dress. I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that she was not adequately superverised. And maybe it happened at the end of the morning anyway. Yes, I'd say your expectations are too high.

What exactly do you expect? I'm not trying to be sarcastic, I'm just not sure exactly why you're upset with the teacher. Are you upset that the teacher didn't notice and change your daughter? Or are you upset that the teacher didn't prevent your daughter from going down the wet slide?

Let your daughter know that if she uncomfortable or needs to change her clothes that all she needs to do is say something to the teacher about it, and the teacher will allow her to go into the bathroom and change her clothes.

Since this is your daughter's first school experience, part of learning is realizing that she needs to speak up, make her needs known and ask politely. It's part of growing up, but she'll get the hang of it :-)

your expectations are not to high but your daughter was old enough to say "I got wet on the slide". teachers do not go around feeling kids bottoms or asking if they are wet. the teacher may not have seen the backside of the child. I would talk to them tell them your disappointed and then also speak to your daughter. Unless she is special needs and not able to speak for herself this is something that she could have / should have handled herself. the same as she would have at home. i know my children at 4 could have said my dress is wet. I think it is more likeley that while yes the dress was wet and your mad its likely that your still not used to giving her to someone else if this is only her 2nd day.
and what does dranged mean?

Well, if she was on the slide just a short while before you arrived, then she wasn't wet very long.
And kids love to climb and slide - that's what a playground is for.
When my son was in preschool, I almost wanted to undress him on the back porch before letting him in the house because he'd have mulch all over his clothing from the playground and it would get all over the house.
He'd bring in sand from the sand box in his pant cuffs and shoes, too.
Sounds like she had a good time.
Additional:
No teacher is going to look after her exactly like you will.
And she's not going to like any teacher as much as you - first time at school it can take awhile (weeks) for a child teacher relationship to form.
Sounds like you're not sure you want her to go to school yet and you'd like to keep her home.
Preschool is not mandatory but if there's no one else at home to play with, it's great for some social interaction and is a great way to learn a bit about how a class works.

When did they play outside? Did you pick her up from the playground or had they been back in class for a while? Unless she has been sitting in wet clothes for hours, I don't think it's a big thing.
I have certainly picked up my daughter dripping wet from school. In the summer they may play with water outside or occasionally kids get wet or muddy after it rains. They don't change the the minute they get wet! Usually they will change after they come back inside and it usually takes 10-20 minutes to get her entire class of twenty pottied and changed.
Did she communicate to the teacher that she was wet? If she didn't, how are they supposed to know? You only noticed as you hugged her, right?

And as for not being supervised at all times: supervision in pre-school is different from you taking her to the playground, where your child is the only one you are looking after. Even with only 6 kids, the poor woman only has one set of eyes...

Part of the preschool experience if giving your child a chance to become more independent and play without someone hovering over her 24/7. Yes, there will be challenges, sometime she may spend 20 minutes in a wet dress, there will be bumps and bruises and scrapes. IMO that's what being a kid is like. It's hard to let go, but I think you can relax.

Sounds to me like your daughter should have told the teacher, or asked to change her clothes. My girls are the same age and if they were uncomfortable, they'd speak up. The teacher probably isn't in the habit of going around checking 4 year olds backs to see if they have inexplicably wet themselves... especially if they weren't supposed to go on a wet slide.

So yes, expectations too high... but I can understand that you're not happy that your daughter spent the day wet. Perhaps work with your daughter at home about speaking up.

First of all it doesn't take lots of effort to go up and down a slide for a 4.5 year old. My 17 month old can pretty much do it by himself even though I am right there. I see that you are a overprotective first time mom and although that's ok in some waysbut I don't think the situation needs the principal. If your daughter was bleeding profusly (sp) that's another thing. Was the dress really dripping? Why doesn't she like her teacher? YOur daughter has to learn to speak up though whether she likes her teacher or not. I am wondering how the teacher didn't notice her go down a slide when she only has 6 kids in her class she has to keep an eye on. It takes secounds to go down a slide but with such a small class she should be aware of everyone. Your daughter should have been remremanded for not listening if she had been paying attention. So I agree with you on the supervision issue I would hate for you to go off the wall over every issue and become THAT mom.

Okay, only 6 kids in the class.

What time was play-ground time?
How long, was she in a wet dress?
She went on the wet slide, even if told not to. Still, though, her dress was wet. Teacher did not notice. Did not notice, that your daughter went... on the slide either. apparently.

Even if your daughter went on the slide despite, I would think the Teacher would have noticed and she knew the slide was wet. Hence she told the students NOT to go on it.

Again, only 6 kids.
Again, how long, was she in a wet dress? 10 minutes? 3 hours?
What is the Teacher doing, when it is play-ground time??? Are other kids from other classes, on the play-ground at the same time??? Or ONLY those 6 kids are there???

Regardless... the Teacher didn't know. (some clothing depending on the color, it is hard to tell if it is 'wet.')
Did the Teacher, also not know... that your daughter went on the slide despite being told not to?????

The issue is: your daughter went on the slide even if told not to, because it is wet. So her dress got wet. She did not tell the Teacher it was wet. Teacher did not notice.
She went on the slide... despite being told not to.
But the Teacher, does not seem to know, that she went on the slide???

Then, was your daughter... reprimanded for not following directions?

Ok let me get this straight you are upset with the teacher because your daughter didn't follow directions and then didn't tell the teacher she got her dress wet and needed to change it? First your daughter didn't listen and then was sneaky about it I don't think the problem is with the teacher.

A school my older son went to focused on natural consequences perhaps this school does the same.

You are expecting too much. A teacher has 2 eyes and can't watch your child every second she has 5 other kids to watch. And it doesnt take a lot of effort to climb and go down a slide kids move very fast!

Is your daughter the type to tell the teacher? I would guess that my 3 yr old would NOT tell me if it were him. Being wet is just not a big deal for him. He's not shy by any means. Is your daughter shy and prehaps nervous she'd get into trouble by telling the teacher? That sounds very feasible "Teacher told me not go to on the slide. I did. I got wet. If I tell teacher I am wet, she'll get mad at me." I don't know if 4.5 yr old reason like that, but maybe it's possible? If so, I wouldn't blame the teacher. I would perhaps be a little upset that it happened at all b/c that means that yes, your daughter was not being watched. I guess I'd have to consider the class size and teacher/kiddo ratio before getting too upset. I was a teacher, and there's no way to watch all the kids in every spot of the playground for the whole time of recess. Esp if the slide is behind the jungle-gym area and from the teachers bench/standpoint, she can't see the slide.

EDITED: Only 6 students? Did she go outside with another kinder class? Often, teachers will want their teacher-time during recess. So Mrs. A & B take their classes outside together. So still, the ratio is great 1 teacher per 6 students, but the teacher might've been talking to the other teacher. Hmm. I probably wouldn't have called a meeting with the principal yet. But that's just me. Was she wet all morning long (hours?) or just for 10-30 minutes? I agree with the post that said wet dress, no biggie. not obeying teacher, could be a big biggie.

There are a lot of kids to keep track of, it is not surprising she did not notice it was wet if she was not dripping like she had peed. Your daughter should have said something to her.

I understand you pay for your daughter to go here, and I understand that maybe you have not left her much before...but as a preschool teacher ( and my class is 3 year olds and I have 11 or 12 at a time) I am confused as to why your daughter did not change herself? If one of the 3 yr olds in my class needed to be changed most of them would do it all on their own.
I do think if she knew the slide was wet she should have made sure no one went down it...

I dont think its a big deal. She went down the slide after being told not to and it might have taken her only a few seconds to do so. She may have only sat on the bottom of the slide and got wet too so she didnt actually slide down so she wasnt being ignored by the teacher or staff. Water wont hurt her and Im pretty sure there isnt time or inclination for teachers to "pat down" each student. Calling a meeting with the principal will only make you look foolish and over protective and since its a private school, you may find yourself being asked to take your daughter somewhere else. They may find you too high maintence and hard to please if you complain about a wet dress on the 2nd day. I bet your daughter wasnt hurt by it and youll find many more important things to worry about later. Id drop the whole thing if I was in your position.

was she cold and shivering? is the room overly air conditioned? Otherwise I would not be upset. My son's preschool had a towel that is used to dry wet slides. that means the kids get to use the playground equipment a lot more. the teachers hung the wet towels on the playground fence to dry in sun and director occasionally took then hone to wash. I think you should donate an old towel
The problem is 1 your daughter didnt speak up is she scared of teacher, generally quiet, or did she not mind the wet dress -many kids wouldnt
and 2 he wet slide is sad kids cant play on it, IF YOU'RE NOT PART OF THE SOLUTION THAN YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM

I don't think that I would be as angry as you sound about it... I'd be irritated that they didn't dry off the slide and then didn't notice that your daughter went on it and got wet, and then didn't really seem too bothered that she was wet. So I guess the teacher's attitude would bug me more than the fact that your daughter got wet... these things happen.

On the other hand, your daughter did go down the slide when she was told not to... did she hear the teacher say not to go down the slide? She was wet after but didn't let the teacher know...

It's her second day and she's 4. Yes the teacher has only 6 kids, but it's her second day too... who knows what was going on with the other 5 kids while yours was on the slide.

Things happen... you can express your displeasure, but I wouldn't make too big of a deal about it. Two hours is a long time not to have contact with a child to know her dress was wet... but I'd give it a little more time before making too much of a stink.

Does you child like the school?

I am mixed on this, I would have been dissapointed in everyone's actions at this point. If there is a change of clothes, yes I would have expected the teacher to have helped change my son in this case. My son has special needs so he may not have known any better in this case, but the teacher should have known better. I am assuming your daughter is "typical" and could have dressed herself or spoke up for herself. So, I think this can and should be looked at as a learning opportunity and have a calm discussion between you and your daughter and teacher.

I have to agree with Rachel. Sorry. At 4 1/2, she should be able to communicate that she got soaked, but the reason she didn't tell the teacher was most likely because she defied the teacher and didn't want to get in trouble. At her age, she should be following directions and should not depend on the teacher to notice that she got her clothes wet. Depending on the staff to student ratio, a teacher may be busy attending to another child and not notice every time a child does the slide or goes through a tunnel. It is time for your daughter to be away from mom, and that means learning independence. The job of school is to educate, not to mother/nurture your child, so please don't have those expectations. Not every teacher will be warm and fuzzy. I am glad that you were satisfied with the meeting and I hope the rest of the school year is a great one for your daughter.

That would bother me too since she had a spare outfit in her cubby and the teacher did not get her changed. How many teachers and/or assistant teachers are in her classroom? Perhaps there are too many children and not enough adults to properly supervise. Also, tell your daughter that if she is uncomfortable or needs help she is responcible to ask her teacher for help! Perhaps the teacher thought she was fine and didn't mind being wet since she didn't say anything.

It is not too much to ask the teacher/school to dry the slide and avoid the problem all together. I work at a daycare and we have to go out and sweep off any puddles and dry off equipment. It is not possible for teacher to stop kids from going down slide just by telling them. Its a slide and they are 4....come on. Even if shes looking right at them they can be down that slide before she can say w-a-i-t! lol They need to be more proactive and dry equipment off and pay more attention to kids, she should have noticed dress was wet. At 4 the teacher should be talking to them at their level and having body contact, etc. They are still more baby. Good for you to have meeting, keep them on their toes and not get lazy.

Good luck to you and family

Updated

It is not too much to ask the teacher/school to dry the slide and avoid the problem all together. I work at a daycare and we have to go out and sweep off any puddles and dry off equipment. It is not possible for teacher to stop kids from going down slide just by telling them. Its a slide and they are 4....come on. Even if shes looking right at them they can be down that slide before she can say w-a-i-t! lol They need to be more proactive and dry equipment off and pay more attention to kids, she should have noticed dress was wet. At 4 the teacher should be talking to them at their level and having body contact, etc. They are still more baby. Good for you to have meeting, keep them on their toes and not get lazy.

Good luck to you and family

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At first I figured she had at least 15 kids in the class, but if there are only 6 I may be a little upset also. Could your daughter have not told the teacher because the teacher asked the kids not to use the slide and she disobeyed? I am not sure I would get so upset as to call a meeting over it. I would definitely talk to my child about listening to the teacher. I would then have my child apologized to the teacher for her disobedience. I would like the teacher to have noticed that she was wet and had her change especially if there are only 6 kids. Could there be other children on the play equipment at the same time that the teacher is also in charge of supervising? I know there are times when the teachers would take two classes out to recess to allow a teacher some extra planning time. In the end I guess I would think that my child may decide to listen to the teacher next time the teacher said the slide was wet.

If they had been on the playground just before the end of the day (half day ending at 11:30? yeah.... they probably were out there just prior to pick-up time)... then the teacher may not have noticed she was soaked just yet (pick up time is chaotic, especially the first week or so of school). And I would talk to your daughter about listening and following directions, and yes, also about learning to speak up for herself. But I would not go off on the teacher.

Now, if they went out on the playground at 9:30, and your daughter was in a wet dress until 11:30 and the teacher didn't notice... that would be cause for concern. And I think that would go a bit beyond "natural consequences". In an air conditioned classroom (Tampa, right?) that could get very cold, very quickly. Some teachers (in private schools they have more personal control-not mandated by it being a "public building") keep the temperatures extremely cool or warmer than comfortable, depending on the teacher.

There is a lot of leeway about how much, if at all, and for what reasons to be upset on this one. All depending on WHEN they were on the playground.

That happened to my son once. Except it was winter and his coat was soaking wet! Same response I asked about it and they said he must have got in the little cars which had water in them. When I got him I saw the water dripping off him. So it happens..

She could of at least sent her to the nurse! Poor baby. My goodness she is still a baby! Yep I would be mad and the teacher wouldn't be the only one who heard me! Just teach her yo speak up. My 4 yr old hates being wet and she would have a fit. Yes, I know they may not watch her as you would but its obvious when a child is wet!

First of all its just water. Atleast she didn't pee herself and was left that way. Second your daughter didn't listen to the teacher and did it anyway. Third they may have just come in and the teacher didn't notice that she was wet. She should have told her that her dress was wet and wanted to change. It depends on how many kids she has at once and was trying to get them to settle down. My daughter is 3 1/2 and she tells me when her clothes are wet. I would let it go this time. BUT... if it happens again then I would have an issue. Have a talk with your daughter and tell her that if she is wet again to tell the teacher. Things happen and the teacher can't see everything that is going on.

I would be upset too! Is she not paying attention? And if the play equipment is that wet the kids shouldn't be on it!

yes, i would be mad that the teacher didn't notice. however, in defense of the teacher, if the wetness was on the back, then your daughter may have been sitting on the wet part to hide that it was wet. does that make sense.

there was a group of 4th graders that wanted to play kickball. okay, but stay out of the mud... a group ran over ... then 2 girls walked back and walked straight through the mud. then wanted to go to the office to call home for new shoes. the teacher told them they had to wait. the girls were mad. teacher said, i said to stay out of the mud. you didn't, so now you have to wait.

So when you have the meeting. Try and see if they'll implement a 'wet' check wherein the teacher asks as they come in from recess if anyone got their clothes wet instead of just assuming that 4y listened.

I would be mad too!! Do they have too many kids at the school, for her to not be paying attention? It's a good thing your daughter did not fall off of that slide, she might still be laying out there.....

Take a deep breathe.. it is OK.. the school can not will not ever watch your child the way that you do and can. The teacher has multiple kids to watch. She has lessons to teach.. she has snack to serve and such.

Your daughter at 4 in a classroom needs to be able to go to the teacher and tell her she is wet. My son at 3 was able to tell his teacher that he needed new underwear. The teachers have other kids to watch and asking the teacher to check every childs clothing for wetness every day is way too much.. you might want to take your daughter to a different school.

You didn't notice the dress was wet until you hugged her. How can you expect a teacher to feel every kid's clothing every day?

I can also see your daughter's point because I would have been too shy at that age on the second day of school to talk to a "strange" adult.
I think you should teach your daughter that she can go to her teachers with any problems and that they are there to help. My son was too afraid to ask to use the bathroom at that age until we talked it over with the teachers together so he knew they were on his side. This is a good early life lesson for her.

I would let it go with the teacher. It's an honest mistake if she never looked at the back of your daughter that morning.

Isn't that what that extra change of clothes is? What time did they go to the playground? Just before you picked her up or an hour prior? And no, your expectations are not too high. Teacher is supposed to be responsible for her charges. You did well telling her.