Children's Party- Why Don't People RSVP?

all I can say is call if you can. I hate the No RSVP also. I also have NO idea why people don't. Its very expensive for buying favors and such, just to have a bunch of leftovers. BUt at the same time you never want a child to show up and not get a goodie. :)
You can either call people or plan for everyone showing up. I am sorry you have to go through this with baby knocking to get out.

People are rude, that's why they don't rsvp. Call them and politely put them on the spot. Know that they are squirming while you chat! lol

I have heard (on this site!) that asking for an rsvp is TACKY! ?????!!!!!!

Then on the other end you have to poor mom making 10 extra party favors/treat bags/food JUST IN CASE everyone shows up. RUDE!

I would call them. It's a pain to call so many people, but at least you'll have a better idea how many people will be there.

Have a great party and good luck with the new baby.

I don't know why people don't rsvp. I always do! My daughters b-day party was just this past Saturday. I had 1 person show up that didn't rsvp. Then I had 1 person who didn't show up who DID rsvp. LOL you can't win. Just try to be prepared as much as you can.

Just call and verify, just explain you need a headcount since it is taking place at somewhere other than your home. I never expect everyone to show up anyways. I am one of those that just plain forget to rsvp. I usually try to, but sometimes, life happens.

I'd start making calls to verify.

People get busy, they forget, they misplace the invitation. I don't think most people mean not to RSVP, but it happens.

I'd just start making calls/sending e-mails letting them know that you need a proper head count and are wondering if they'll be in attendance so you have enough food, goodie bags, etc.

Good luck with your two big events coming up at once.

I know your pain regarding RSVP. It is horribly rude and it seems that people just don't care anymore.

In our case, I have personally called and emailed the parents and just said, is "Johnny coming to the party because I have to lock in my #" Usually this embarrasses them but so what...why are they so rude.

I was especially po'd when I had about 30 RSVP's for a big party for daughter at $25/head and then I had 50 show up. I had called people before my lock in date as well. Some of the extra 20 that showed up decided they wanted to change their plan when they realized the others were coming. I guess that is teens for you.

I'll stop venting....

Happy birthday to your little one and congrats on your new bundle of joy!

Firstly well done! And good you have a back up plan :-)
I would send out a text/email today asking people to confirm today if their child can make it or not. I think you have a valid excuse to be chasing up. Also have a back up - just in case some one turns up who hasn't confirmed. ie. an extra party bag.
This has happened to me so many times!! One of my daughters birthdays is straight after the Christmas break. I have to send the invites out before the Christmas hols, but every year people manage to misplace or forget about it during the Christmas break. I have found myself sending out chase up mails or texts so many times. It is very frustrating....
Anyway hope all those people reply super quick. And all the best for your new arrival!! And enjoy the party!

I think most assume RSVP is passe or, like my mother, they assume the "respond if you please" applies only to cancellations and if they are coming they don't have to call.

Typically, per etiquette, one should plan for half the no. of ppl invited to show. In our experience it's been 1/3. Thus, half RSVPs sounds like a great no. to me! I wouldn't worry too much about it, plan for 1/3 more food than you think you need, and if there's not enough the kids will get over it. Most children that age don't care about food anyway - it's the presents, toys, decorations, and activities that make the party enjoyable for them.

We typically send out prepaid return postcards for RSVP with invitations (as with a a wedding invite - party size, ages, are you coming?) and have gotten better results with that than a simple phone number. I think perhaps in our technology driven society, an email addy or postcard is less personal and thus more attractive to what seems to have become a slightly agoraphobic culture.

:D Have fun!!!

Because people are RUDE. I think it is the WORST to not RSVP at all. If you can't come, just say thank you, but no. If you can come, GREAT. But like you said, you are in a tough spot as far as preparing for it, so you NEED to know. I always try to plan for a few extra, but am always surprised when everyone who said yes actually shows up. I know I had someone call me a day before my daughter's bday party and ask if her daughter could come, I said sure, called the place and paid the extra money for her, then she didn't show - no call or anything. I really dislike that behavior in adults.

This is SO rude -it drives me crazy. Send out an email if you can to the ones who haven't RSVP'd and say, "We must give an accurate headcount for Saturday, so if you plan on coming, I have to know." If you can't send out an email or you don't hear, I wouldn't pay for them to show up. If they do and it's a problem for the museum, tell them you're so sorry, but you never got their RSVP. I think people need to learn some manners! You could include a few extras just in case, but I would not have a problem turning people away if they didn't have the decency to let you know. Maybe they'll think twice the next time.

Because they think we are mind readers.
Because they think they are so busy and they are the only people that are busy.
Because they do not like to talk on the phone.
Because they just assume you know them so well whether they will come or not.
Because they are lazy.
Because they think it is ridiculous to respond to an RSVP for a child's party.

Who knows..
I do special events and am always appalled at the people that RSVP, then do not show up and call. Or who do not RSVP and just waltz in like it is no big deal.

I can understand a few invitations being lost in the mail, but over all, there is really no polite excuse.

Just call and say, "We were sure hoping you all were going to be able to join us? Do you think you are going to be able to attend?"

Next time consider mailing the paper invite AND doing an evite..
I am sorry, they did not do you a favor by responding and now you have to call and "breastfeed" these people.

Sorry, RSVP'ing is one of my pet peeves. It is so boorish to not respond.

Hopefully, DP, someone reading these messages will not do it again, but I think at this point, you are just screwed (pardon my french...)

Last year, we moved and I planned a party at a popular inflatable place for my 6 year old son. I invited 25 kids and got 1 RSVP. 'Not a big deal', I thought...'people don't RSVP anymore'. I had 3 kids show!! 3 kids!!! and one had to leave early. I planned this party for a school-day evening, so I had dinner as well as cake. I was madder than you-know-what and my son was hurt. I figured out that I spent about $40 per kid.

This year, I am going to take him and 2-3 friends someplace special, like the movies or something. I'd rather spend the money on those who want to celebrate with us. We will save the party for family..

Good luck and congratulations!

I would allow for maybe 4 more to show up. I don't know why people don't RSVP. I think alot of people play the 'wait and see if something else comes up' so they don't want to say yes or no.

I threw a party last year, invited 40 kids (it was a big space) and only 10 showed RSVP'd and up. I planned goody bag wise for all 40 kids just in case, and only 10 kids showed up. I had TONS of goody bags left over.

M.

The same reason people don't hold doors, say "thank you", etc because people these days are just plain rude. I wouldn't allow people that didn't rsvp to attend. When my SIL has a big party for her son next year she plans on putting down on the invite that people that don't rsvp will not be allowed in. I have no problem if the party is at my house but if paying to have it somewhere I would have a huge issue if someone didn't rsvp and then showed up.

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I know exactly how u feel, I have 2 boys ages 8 and my oldest just turned 11. And with all of their birthday parties only a handfull will call and say they are coming and then all of them will show up! So what I do is bring extra goody bags with extra stuff to put into them! It happens all the time. Even if its a place where we have to pay upfront! We usually get our money back for the ones that didn't show up. Good Luck it is always a guessing games..always

It will be fine. Don't fret over it. Just get a little extra food and goodie bags or whatever you are doing for the party. 12 is plenty of kids for a party. If extra kids show up, and it's not "perfect," no one will care, and the kids will still have fun. Assume it's 12, add a little more, and let whatever happens, happen.

If you can learn to give up perfection now, your whole parenting experience will be easier. (Spoken from experience.)

As a mom who's forgotten to RSVP, I have more sympathy now for them (although it is absolutely, yet sometimes unintentionally, rude!)

For my four kids parties, I include on my invitations the RSVP with email and phone number and add "REGRETS ONLY" in large letters. If the DON'T respond, count them in! So far it's worked well, but you will inevitably get one or two that forget.

So many people (spontaneous people, like me) don't decide what they're doing until the last minute, and some kind of leave it up to the kid who was invited and that kid doesn't decide that something is important until the last minute.

Everyone is so busy these days that I'd say that you were actually 'lucky' (or blessed) to have even twelve people to respond affirmatively! Plan for those 12, and probably one or two of them WON'T make it (at that 'last minute') and a couple who didn't respond WILL. It pretty much evens out!

It is VERY frustrating but it seems to be the norm now. What I do is the day after the cut off I email everyone who did not RSVP or call those that I do not have their email and I ask them directly. I say, "I did not receive an RSVP if you were attending the party or not and I don't want to assume that you are not coming and not be prepared. I need to have a head count for food and goodie bags for the children". In your case you have even more reason to email or call telling them that you may not be at the party and really need a head count. So sorry you are having to deal with this stress, people are rude!

It is very rude of people to do this, but sadly it happens at MOST children's birthday parties. You didn't say what you are planning on doing FOR the party, that would have a lot to do with what you'd be doing for the other kids. I'd say make sure you have enough for for all 25 kids, and a parent for each. And a goody bag for each kid. Good luck! And congratulations on both your new one and your birthday! (:

Oh, and by the way, I always call or text everyone a day or two before the party!

our brave /crazy for having 25 kids to a 4 year olds bday party lol. if you put a date of when to rsvp by and they havent then assume they arnt coming. if they call and say they can come just say im sorry i had to turn in a head count and i didnt hear from you by.... 12 is plenty of kids have fun!

I hate how people are so rude and don't RSVP too! My daughter is now 10 and you just never know what people are going to come or not. Every party is different. I could tell you all kinds of stories!

This past year my daughter had a small birthday party. She invited 6 people. They all said that they would come. Only 1 showed up. 2 showed up as we were leaving the party. I don't know what happened there. I had done all kinds of things for their goody bags but it just was a waste.
I thought that I had learned my lesson from previous parties so I didn't open all of the goody bag stuff except for the amount of people that I knew were coming.
My daughter one time invited the class (28) and only 8 came. This was the time I had learned a lesson about goody bags. I couldn't call all the parents because we didn't have their numbers (the school won't give out the numbers. At her prechool they did which was awesome so you could make all kinds of friends with the parents and kids . . . now I don't know how to meet parents in my kids class. I volunteer and go to all her things but its pretty hard.).