Crying Hard at Night

My kids have both gone through this after travelling, and after illness and teething. It's because their routine is out of whack and now she needs to be re-trained. It stinks because you thought you were done but my experience is that it doesn't take as long for them to remember as for them to learn it from scratch. Good luck to you both!

my advice is to go back to the sleep training you did with her that worked before. When i did Ferber, I started with a 3 minute interval. Went in, left, and before it reached 5 minutes, she was asleep. If you go back to where you started, I imagine it will be easier on both you and your child. Hopefully she will remember that how to sleep well at home. I'm sure the blame is that you went away. She'll get back into her routine soon. best of luck!!

At seven o'clock on the dot please go to sleep. You are in your bed and that is the good part. Crying it out has many reasons and if all are tended to such as diaper, drink, cuddling and child wants to be with you stay in the room but do as the nanny suggests...continually put child back in bed and assure her that you are there while you sit on the floor of the bedroom...Every night move a little bit further away from your spot after the child falls asleep.

I've read a bunch that says even when CIO "works" there is a lot of backsliding after vacations, illness or any disruption to normal routine.
you have probably read dr. sears "sleep book" and this one made a big impression on - "The Science of Parenting".
Wish i had answers. Only that it is common to have this happen.
Which makes me wonder if CIO is really worth it.
And who does it "work" for, ultimately. The babies or the parents?
I wish there were more definitive answers.
Or better yet I wish there were "Sleep Helpers" , so to speak, that could come to our houses and help us through these tough phases, kindof like the SuperNanny.
I would want someone that could tailor the particular method to the child's particular tempermant.

Don't beat yourself up for letting her cry it out....sometimes it is the only thing that works. Having read almost every book on sleep training, and having no success...I tried it too. It isn't cruel as long as you are going in every 15 minutes to reassure her. It worked for getting my duaghter to go to sleep on her own, but she would wake up several times a night...so after a few weeks of sleep deprivation we were back to square one. I'm happy to say now that my daughter (7mos.) puts herself to sleep for bedtime and naps and sleeps through the night. Anyway, from what I have read it is very normal for them to have a hard time getting back into a routine whenever it has been disrupted (like going away for the weekend)....If you keep your routine consistent it shouldn't take long for her to get back into a normal routine. I modified the Ferber method in a way that seemed reasonable to me.....we do the EXACT same routine for naps and bedtime...change diaper, read story, sing song, then lay down...she usually starts crying after a few minutes, so I will go in and pick her up to try for a burp only ONCE, if she cries again I will go in and give her the pacifier and reassure her without picking her up...if she continues crying I go in at 15 minute intervals without picking her up to reassure her, and eventually she falls asleep....it took me several weeks of doing this exactly the same way before our daughter caught on. I think most people have better luck and it works within a week. She may also be overtired...you could try putting her to bed a little earlier. Our daughter goes to bed between 6-6:30, and usually sleeps until 6am.
Good luck,
J. W

A.,
I think her little schedule was disrupted while you were away and she needs a little re-training. It probably won't take as long this time. Good luck!

I along with you opted for the "cry it out" method for sleep training. Any change in routine is going to throw your baby off. Nap time for some reason is a different animal. My son did the same thing. In a few days he was back to his normal no crying ways. When your baby gets older small changes won't affect her as much. Don't worry about it and stick to one plan and your baby will be fine.

Ferbe would say go back to your original sleep training to get her back on track. It will only take a few nights. Her routine has just been disrupted a little. You will have these occasional relapses, a few times as your baby grows, teethes, etc. Just go back to what you were doing and stick with it. She will learn what to expect, be comforted and be off to sleep!

Crib bumpers! Get rid of them. My son did this & it took us forever to figure it out. Inside his crib was too dark at night w/the bumpers on. The light from the nightlight was not getting into the crib. He was fine during the day (naps) b/c it was bright enough for him to see.

You are definitely NOT a bad Mom for letting her cry it out! I have done the same thing with my son from the time he was 3 months old (he is now 8 months old.) And even now, if we have a lot going on, or go somewhere for a weekend, when we get back home, he will sometimes cry more when it is time to go to bed. If everything else is fine (she's fed and changed, etc.) then I think it is fine just to let her cry it out and she will get back into the routine. If she is really cranky, maybe she is starting to teethe? I'm not sure if she already has any teeth, but when my son started, he was just crying uncontrollably. I could feel his gums getting swollen and that is how I knew his teeth were coming in. On those nights, I would give him Orajel when I laid him down to sleep. He would still cry, but he would be able to calm himself down to go to sleep. Also, on the nights where he was just crying really hard (not related to his teething), if it lasted longer than usual, I would go in and rub his back and that would sometimes calm him enough to fall asleep. But I was cautious with doing that because I didn't want him to think that every time he cried I would be there, it was only if he was completely out of sorts. Good luck and honestly, don't feel bad for letting her cry it out. She is learning how to soothe herself and learning that night time is for sleeping! Good luck!

Is she getting any teeth. it may be early but she may be getting teeth. she also may be thrown off from going away the weekend before. she will be alright. try giving her some tylenol if she seems warm or give her a bath and put her to bed. is she being fed before she goes to bed? may be she is hungry? she may be ready for some baby cereal.rice cereal is good to start out with and they have brown rice which will be good because it has more fiber and should not bind her up. it is better to let them cry it out because it teaches them to self soothe. It sounds like you are doing great. you will figure it out. good luck

I have an 11-month old and we had the same problem when she was 5 months, that's when we moved her from the bassinet to the crib. She used to cry when I put her in the crib. I started by playing with her while she's in the crib, like peekaboo or I sing to her. I also keep a couple of teething toys, some picture books and attached an unbreakable mirror on the side of the crib, we do not use crib bumpers. The toys and the mirror keep her entertained. Now that she can pull herself up, she loves being in the crib because she can walk around while holding on the rail.
So basically, I put her in the crib to let her play until she gets tired. I dim the lights (we keep a dim light through the night, she doesn't like it when it's dark) and does not have any toys that make noises. So there is no extra stimulation to keep her awake. She still wants me to be in the room, I sit next to the crib reading or solving puzzles, or I talk/sing to her.
She does this for about 30 minutes up to an hour and then she falls asleep, I leave the room at that point.
The cool thing about this, besides no-crying, is when she wakes up in the middle of the night, she just plays some (I can hear her through the monitor) and falls asleep again. It's also great to spend a relaxing time with her since I work full time and the evenings are the only time I spend with her.

Go in every 10 minutes and soothe her without taking her out of her crib, just to let her know your there. Could it be an ear infection or teething? - I know your the mama, but in my opinion 5 months is a little too young to be crying it out at night- sorry.
Good luck

Don't you just hate when someone with a baby the same age as yours gushes about how her little one sleeps thru the night???? It's so hard this CIO ... Babies are very adaptable but not without protest. She can't talk and say "mom I don't wanna go to bed" or "mom I want you to hold me" so she cries. Same with my little guy, we waited til 6 mo to let him CIO but we do moderate method of checking every 5-10 min and pikcing him up by 5 am. We give our children all the love we can all day long and at night we need to sleep to be able to continue a healthy life with them. I am sleep deprived as well and it is not fun. Sleep depervation negatively affects your marriage and your relationship with your other children. So, for me, I feel like a better mom for letting him CIO. In the end, he'll get the sleep he needs to grow and I'll get the sleep I need to be a good mom, friend, wife and person in general.

As frustrating as it is, there's a pretty big sleep regression around 19 weeks. There's another one about 9 months also. As they go through developmental spurts, there's commonly a disruption to their sleep.

I would soothe her back to sleep when she wakes up. Even the CIO supporters advocate not using it for a child under 6 months of age. we're finally on the tail end of the 9 month sleep regression here and DD is starting to sleep better for me. Of course she also had her first night terror last night too. Great fun! I can't wait to get 4 hours of sleep in a row again.

S.