Daughter Is Having Anxiety Attacks???

Hi K.,
Another option to try that is simple, free and amazingly effective with anxiety issues is EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). I use it with my children all the time--we call it "tapping". You can see a short video about it and a link to get the free online manual for how to do EFT at my website: http://www.healingtreewellness.com/Links.html. It's my goal to get this information out to as many moms as possible. Children respond so well to EFT--I love it.
HTH,
B.

Hi K.,

I would mention it to her pediatrician, who may recommend behavioral therapy.

But mostly I would validate what she says before showing her why her fears are irrational. Just paraphrasing back what she says can be calming. Things like "I hear you saying you're afraid that the decorator tip might go down the drain, and that is scary to you". You'd be amazed how far that will go- she will feel heard and understood and that in itself is comforting.

Then continue in the way you were, gently showing her that the bath toys are fine, and what would happen if something was down the drain. See if she wants to put something down the drain to see how it can be retrieved- but only if she wants to.

Patience is the key. Doing the above should help, but it will take time.

FWIW---I have a cousin whose daughter had a lot of anxiety problems. While her other daughter was receiving speech therapy the topic came up and long story short the anxiety ridden daughter had some tongue thrust issues. Once she received therapy her level of anxiety went down considerably.

Point being.....I would think behavioral first as you have but if you have a good pediatrician it may warrant talking to them about possible medical causes. My son has some anxiety issues and when I talked about it to our pediatrician we discussed putting him on a probiotic to help his gut work better and give his body the B vitamins (our stress vitamin) he needs. (It was specifically recommended NOT to just give a B vitamin unless a deficiency had been diagnosed----just the probiotic.)

Best wishes.

Hi K.,

My advice may sound harsh, but you need to teach her to calm herself down. You can't get in her head and do it for her. When she panics, then stop her and sit her down. Let her calm down and as I tell my daughter "Chill!" for a minute. Like you said in your question, most of the things she is panicing about will wait for her to calm down and then go through the process of recovering whatever she is looking for.

My mom is a very anxious type of person, and when my daughter has been around g'ma, she tends to mimic her behaviour. Each time she's had an extendend vacation with g'ma, I usually go through a day of reminding Reeanna to calm down. Its kind of funny, because this "Calm down" and "Chill" has even been incorporated into her play and passed on to her friends.

Hope that helps.
TRUDI

Hang in there. Kids go through phases and cycles. I think sometimes if they feel they are getting a strong reaction, they will ham it up for the attention, but other times I think that they are just having a hard time adjusting and processing everything.

One thing that pops into my mind is that she might not be sleeping that well - if the tonsils are obstructing air flow. Lack of deep restorative REM sleep can leave anyone on edge.

I can email you some information about some natural technologies that have had great results with anxiety without any side effects. There are things that can help her sleep better at night and also things that can ground her better during the day too. Just email me and I'll be happy to email you more info. I've seen life changing results and use these technologies on my entire family - kids and pets too (no placebo effects there).

Good luck!
S.

She sounds like a very normal five year old that is learning the world of cause/effect and that things can happen out of her control.
My daughter around this same age had a lot of unwarranted anxieties over weather, all sorts of things. I just helped her with each issue as it arose and it lasted maybe six months and we were past it. I truly believe it is a phase. I think distracting her with the facts and just listen to her it should pass.

For you it is about being sympathetic but educating her about her fears, not encouraging them. If you remain calm then she will follow suit, eventually.

For my daughter I just got books about weather and we read them, they have a great kids series, so she realized that no she cannot control weather however it is also something that takes a combination of things to occur, not to mention in Colorado we do not get hurricanes!

For your daughter, just have her calm down, then talk to her about what her issue is. I always tell my kids there is always a solution to the problem, but you have to be calm and think it through. It may not be the solution you wanted but there is a way to figure things out, that crying and being really upset your brain is clouded.

If you think the Flonaise is part of the problem, research what the side effects are and in four months it should be totally out of her system. If you are ever truly concerned call her Pediatrician. They are there to answer any questions or concerns you ever have.

The first thing to do is calm her down with a breathing technique so she can think calmly. Have her repeat after you counting 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 etc. while looking at your face. Then, have her breathe a few times. This works well for me when my son (5 years) is starting to get too emotional. Then, ask her what she thinks is going to happen when she is in a panic. Maybe, by allowing her to release her fears to you, she will be able to get a handle on her feelings. Then, proceed with explaining the reality of her fears. You may also consider bringing in a professional if you are unable to ease her fears but this could just be a phase, especially if she is just starting school and used to being with you all the time.

K.,
your examples of your daughter happened to the tee with my son who is now 8. He still has anxiety when he is sick or hurt but we talk to him about over re-acting and that seems to calm him down.
One of the things we did when he would freak out over the heater and the drain was ask him what is the worst thing that could happen if the toy went down the drain, i would say well it would go to the ocean and the fish would have a toy to play with. My idea was to make up stories that were so crazy it go his mind off of the fear, after making up silly stories he eventually figured out the he was over reacting and simply that accidents happen.

Hi K.. I'm a divorced working mother of 3 kids aged 8,5,3. My oldest has complete melt downs over very minor things. He is on meds for ADHD that help him function greatly but he needs a psychiatrist to help him sort out why he freaks over things. He's not on meds for anxiety but it is helping him to talk to someone about it. Somedays i just want to run screaming from the house because i've had it with the drama. Talk to her pediatrian about it, i am sure they can help her and you with suggestions. :)

It's very normal. She can't see what is down the drain or the heater vents, so it can be very scary to her. Some kids are more sensitive to that kind of stuff than others. Keep reassuring her that most things are too big (including her!) to go down the drain. Maybe take the vent covers off and let her look down the vent so she can see what's down there. Or get some books at the library about plumbing so she can see what happens when the water goes down the drain. Kids can be very unsure of the unknown, so much so it causes panic in them. My son is 5 and also acts that way about some things. There was a time when he was terrified of wind carrying him away. He grew out of it. And I was very reassuring and we learned everything we could about wind together. So give her information. That helps with the anxiety. It takes away that unknown factor. Usually once kids figure out how something works, they aren't as scared of it.

Well, this one's interesting. First off, it's incredibly common that kids turning five have a turn for the worse with their behavior. It's all about an increased awareness of what's expected of them at that age, and therefore, performance anxiety. However, I've never heard it expressed in this anxious manner before.

Although, if she tends to express her stress via anxiety, I guess this could be considered normal for her.

Try discussing common things that kids learn how to do at this age, and figure out if she's afriad she won't be able to accomplish them. Learning to read, ride bike, whistle, go to school, move up at Sunday school, etc. What you may find is, as she accomplishes these things one by one, she'll relax and realize her fear was overblown. She'll become a confident five-year-old.

If, during the next difficult stage of her life, she hasn't outgrown this extreme anxious reaction to stress, I might suggest taking her to a behavioral psychologist, so that she can learn how to tone down her stress reaction. Otherwise, she'll keep reacting like that everytime something goes wrong (Dad loses a job, Grandma dies, etc.).

Dear K. - It sounds to me as if your daughter might benefit from some work at the level of her soul - beyond the level of the mind and emotions. I have had incredible results working with parents and their children with issues such as these. Feel free to email me if you are interested. All work can be done over the phone.

M.
____@____.com

Take her to the doctor. I don't have personal experience with this, but she may be suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder or some other issue. It may not be, but I've heard the earlier people learn coping mechanisms the better off they are.
Lots of children have irrational fears, but this seems more serious than that. It could even be triggered by her medication, who knows? But taking her to the doctor will help and give you the piece of mind that you did all you could for her. It's got to be tough for a little girl.

Does anyone else in your family struggle with panic attacks and anxiety? If there are, statistics greatly increase for other families members to have it. I would talk to her doctor about it, let her talk to her doctor about it and go from there. Don't be alarmed if they say it is a panic disorder and there are meds and therapy involved. it would be worse to not get the help because most people who have anxiety and are undergoing treatement can live full and healthy lives. Wheras if htey don't recieve treatment they could live in a world of fear where they are unable to function. The doc can do lab work and make sure that there are no other underlying issues going on and then you can build a plan together to go forward to help your daughter.

Call the pharmacy and ask the pharmacist the side effects from withdrawl of flonase. Other than that, My 5 year old has anxiety and wont let things drop since her brain surgery. I had to take her to a therapist so they could help her and show her what to do. They also showed me some stuff to ease her anxiety. She is not on medication because I wanted help to learn to control it not something to mask it.

Hi--
A couple of things. If she had chronic tonsilitis there's a good chance she has allergies. I would get her checked. Allergies cause the body to release adrenaline, which could explain her freaking out on small things. There are some natural remedies you could try. First, quercetin and nettles is a natural anti-histamine you can get at vitamin cottage in liquid form. It's totally safe--i've given it to my young baby. Second, back's flower remedy would be great when's she's freaking out. You can also try homeopathic calm drops made my historical remedies. Again, all these things you can find at vitamin cottage. I have a great natural doc that treat allergies--both my boys have had lots of problems and this guy is a life saver! And the advantage is natural remedies don't have the side effects that chemical medicines do. Let me know if you're interested and I'll get you his name.
Good luck!
J.