G.C.
Your request stuck a cord with me. Let me tell you a bit about my mom, and her mom, my grandmother. My mom was/is an only child. I am the 3rd of 8 kids. While growing up, we'd get a birthday card from my grandmother and she would sign her name in it. Sometimes there would be a dollar in it. My grandmothers favorite age for her grandkids was about age 3 or 4 to age 6 or 7 (maybe). She would teach us to play 'dominos' and 'jacks' (sometimes checkers), but once we started wining the games (without her letting us win) she would stop playing with us. She would have 'treasure hunts' for us when we would come and visit her. She would have foot prints cut out of paper and taped to the floor for us to follow and to find the treat at the end. As we got older and started to get married, my grandmother only went to the wedding of the 2 who got married 1st. She did not attend any of the other weddings or receptions, or graduations from high school. She also had 'favorites', and did not go out of her way to hide it. If someone were to ask me if I liked my grandmother or not, they might be surprised for me to tell them that I love her with all my heart. She is one of my greatest heros. I look at her life, and what she had to go through and I love and acept her for the person that she was and what she was able to give and share with me.
My mom was an only child, who then got married and had 8 children, so my childhood might have been different from many others. I am married with 5 children, and I have learned from the experiance with my own grandmother, that my mom will be the grandmother that she can be. My mom LOVES being a grandmother (she has 18 with 1 on the way) and has to have a picture of all of the grandkids in her purse, but don't ask her to babysit! She travels a lot and will send a post card to the family, and maybe all it will have is an "I'm thinking of you" written on it. She is not one to call and chat a lot on the phone, and will maybe even reply to an email with "I have not read this yet, but thank you." Some people may say that I do not have a close relationship with my mom because we do not talk often, but I love her for who she is and that little bit that she is able to give and offer of herself.
This may be way off from what you are going through right now. Your request just trigured my own thoughts and feelings with my own family. I have some syblings who are upset because they don't have a 'regular' mom/grandma, and it's sad to see them missing out on what bit is offered. I'm so happy that you are enjoying your little one and ready to welcome a new little one too. They might not always show it, but they will be glad to have a happy mom. I'm sure that you will get many helpful ideas from others. I just wanted to let you know that someone is thinking of you and wishing you well.