My son has been attending the same MDO program since he was 9 mths old and is now 2.5 years old and after each summer he has been moved up to a new class room and he is now in his 3rd class. Since day one with this class the teachers have never seemed friendly or nice to me or my husband. He comes home daily with a report card and lately it says he has been disruptive in class during nap time. He takes a nap everyday at home or at my moms but will not take a nap at school, so during this time they are wanting him to have quiet time on his mat, which I completely agree with. However, lately the teachers have said that multiple kids are not napping and being disruptive but today his card said VERY and disruptive was underlined which I am feeling is a little over board. They said that multiple kids were running around the room and screaming and making loud noises along with my son.
I am thinking I need to change his schools which has been a gut feeling for a while now!
He is obiviously needing a nap which is why he is acting out because he is tired, and am thinking that maybe he just needs a little extra attention during this time to get him to sleep like maybe a back rub and just someone sitting by him. I know I can not expect this all the time but maybe just to get him adjusted.
And with todays report card, I feel that it was un-appropriate to put what they did on there, especially when he is not the only child doing this.
He is a great child every where he goes, very well mannered, listens appropriatley for a 2.5 year old, so I am just very stuck, PLEASE HELP !!!!
Thank you to everyone for helping with your great advice for this. I will be speaking to his teachers on wednesday as well as interviewing some other schools.
As to the post from 3boysunder3, How dare you speak to another mother in need of advice the way you did. All you know about me is from this one post and it gives you no right to say that I am not discipling my child correctly and that I should gain control over my son or that he should be able to put him self to sleep. As a matter of fact he is able to put him to sleep and has done so since he was 6 mths. old, he is very well behaved and I have very strict rules that he must obey. His teachers dirrectly said to me that there are 6 children that are this way in class and that 2 of them are very hard to discipline and she feels that my son is following them.
However, from mother to mother we should not be here to put people down or to make others feel as if we are not doing a good job. We are always learning and I use this site for adivce but not so that I feel awful as a parent.
As for everyone else, thank you for all you supportive adivce !!!
Sounds like the teachers have no control over their classroom & are blaming it on a bunch of 2 year olds. Talk to the director & maybe start looking for a new preschool. Good teachers know what to do to get those kids either sleeping or chilling out.
you need to remember that just because he is YOUR "little angel" does not mean is actually an angel. you cannot expect that he will be getting special attention to fall asleep. He is TWO AND A HALF YEARS OLD, he should be falling asleep on his own, unassited, and should have been able to do this for a very long time, like, over a year ago long time. if he is not able to do something as simple as fall asleep on his own then he shouldnt be going to places like that. and you need to discipline your child, make him behave and make him realize his behavior is not acceptable. in this whole post all you are doing is bashing the place he is enrolled at and not holding your son accountable to his bad behavior. if it has gotten to the point that he is disruppting the whole class and causing other kids to misbehave then you should probable pull him out, and keep him home until you are able to teach him to behave.
I don't actually think what they wrote to you was inappropriate. He was being especially disruptive, that's what they are supposed to report to you and need you to know. It's not your business what other kids were involved, and they shouldn't downplay his behavior just because there were others involved.
That being said, maybe its't not a great fit for your son. It does sound like they are having classroom management issues, and that is a concern. they should be involving you, in my opinion, to help at home get him on track to follow rules and procedures while he is there. If you totally wash your hands of it (it's all on them since he's there) then everyone is being set up to fail. It might help if you ask them what you can be doing to help support better behavior at school -- a reward chart for napping, practicing "quiet nap time" so he can remember how he's supposed to behave -- what ideas can they give you to work toward the common goal? If THEY are leaving this all on you, like it's your or your son's fault that he can't keep still (I'd love to meet the 2.5 yo who is always compliant), then they are not on your team and it's time to move on.
I'm sorry, this made me giggle. He's just a little toddler, really still a baby. Is he undermining the teachers' authority and recruiting dissidents to his cause too? Perhaps he has plans to lead a day care revolution.
How stupid of the school. They don't sound capable of dealing with very normal toddler behaviour. They also don't sound very loving. My children's day care always provided a little back rub, cuddling or attention when needed. Pfft. Kick em to the kerb.
I worked daycare and worked a lot in the 2-year old room for many years. He's two, and it sounds like he's acting like a 2-year-old. We always assisted the kids in falling asleep, even into the 3-4 year old room. We had teachers sitting with 2-4 cots around them. Usually I could bounce 2 cots and rub one or two backs at once. I got very good :) I never expected all 2-year olds to fall asleep unassisted and sometimes kids went in stages. Sometimes they were good nappers for a while and then suddenly for a period of time they weren't. I think that's perfectly normal!
It sounds like poor management to me. I'd never have kids running around at naptime. THEY ARE TWO! The TEACHER is in charge. She should have enough control to keep that from happening.
I'd look for a different school. It sounds like yours is not a good match, at least with this teacher. I don't think they handled letting you know incorrectly, but what can you do? Seriously? Your child is in their charge. They should be willing to either work with you on it or they need to handle it themselves. There isn't anything you can do when you're at work and he is at their school!
Change schools - the teacher doesnt have the class management skills to handle a group of two year olds.
My 3 year old son is strong willed and NOT an angel - however, at his daycare he eats, snacks, naps, plays with all the other children with little to no trouble. The only time we did have a series of problems was when he had a new teacher, who was not firm and consistent. I was worried every day and started thinking that there was something wrong with him. He got moved into a different class, with an experienced teacher, and then - back to very few problems.
Your son does not need to be in a disorderly environment, and getting in trouble and feeling like a troublemaker, and you dont need to be stressed about it.
There are plenty of mothers day out programs around. I would definitely switch.
I would look for another place. Everyone naps at my DD's daycare and there are a lot of kids. It sounds like the class is poorly managed. What do they expect you to do about it anyway?
When my youngest was that age he was the same way. He did not want to go to sleep. Yes he was not easy going at home so that is different. But not all kids are the same and they don't react the same. He would not lay down and nap very well ever at daycare. Some kids are too stimulated with everything around them. And you are right some kids really need to have someone just show them some attention but unfortunatly the teacher does not seem to understand that. You need to talk to her and maybe remind them that you pay them to watch him. Also if you do look at others ask them what they woudl do if a child of that age does that. That way you know upfront. You need to feel comfortable with who is taking care of your child.
Good Luck and God Bless!
It sounds like this place isn't a good fit. I'd definitely look for another place.
I just wanted to add one small comment, my guess is that you are not the only parent that received the note stating "VERY Disruptive" advocate with the teachers and the Director of the school on behalf of your child, but keep in mind if the school was always good before this year, it should still be a good school. Give the director a chance to respond to the situation, then if they can not properly handle the problem consider changing schools. Best of Luck, I have an active child and it was such a blessing to find teachers that understood this behavior without punishing it.
Having worked in daycare for a number of years, I can tell you that it is a calling. Some do the work because it's all they can find. This MIGHT be your schools situation; however, I also know that for some of us (I'm guilty) there is that one child that will annoy you because of a certain "way" about them. It may not be true anymore (I had as many as 40 children under my care when I was only 17), but another issue might well be that the teacher simply doesn't have time to give YOUR child that extra attention. Of course, if they don't seem to like you or your husband (for whatever reason) they might be holding that against your child unknowingly by expecting too much of a three year old. I remember telling my two's and threes that they didn't have to nap....just to lay down for a little while....and before you know it they would be out. It could just be that these teachers lack the necessary skills to deal with YOUR child. Hang in there...but go with your instintcts. You could be right on about changing schools. You want to be with a school that treats you and your child appropriately!
I agree with the moms who say it sounds like poor class management. It's fine that they let you know a problem is developing, but there also needs to be a feedback loop in both directions so you and his teachers can work as a team.
It seems like you can ask if they would rub his back or sit next to him for a bit but if they say no, then it's not the place for you. It's not their fault either. I'm sure they have lots of kids and maybe don't have time for special attention or don't have the desire. If so, that makes the place unattractive for you. May work for other people. And if you push hard, they may stop writing things you don't like but it doesn't mean they'll actually feel differently about your son.
Always go with your gut. I had a similar situation and I moved my 3 yr old, and I DO NOT regret it! One of the BEST decisions I ever made! Good luck to you!
