My 18 month old daughter is fine when I leave the house for work, but she's really been having a hard time at bed. As soon as she is out of the tub, she clings to me to dress her, give her milk, and put her to bed. Then it normally takes 2 hours before she falls asleep and I can leave the room. Would that be considered separation anxiety even if it never happens during the day?
Maybe not separation anxiety but she may not be ready for bed.
Sounds like you might need to get her more tired or move her bedtime back a bit later so she's more ready to sleep.
Try that first.
Oh and have a bed time routine.
Not seperation anxiety just her way off dragging out bed time. welcome to life with toddlers
My kids never had separation anxiety but they sure didn't want to go to bed. :) They would have worshiped me as a god if it got them to stay up five minutes longer.
Not saying that it is the same thing but mine were the kids that I had to chase down hugs from and they stuck to me like velcro at bed time.
It's completely normal. Toddlers aren't cookie cutouts, and separation anxiety doesn't clock in and out at certain times of day. If she needs the snuggles, the pampering, the mothering, the extra time with you then give it to her. She's still a baby and is showing you that she wants the bonding time. This time disappears far too quickly. Savor it.
I'm with K.P. on this. Sounds like she may just want more time up with you.
Take a look at the Dr. Ferber sleep training book. If you put her to bed at 7, and she doesn't sleep until 9 consistently, try putting her to bed at 9:30 for a few nights to correct the lengthy going to bed/ going to sleep part of your night. Once you've both mastered that process, nudge her bedtime earlier, no more than 15 minutes at a time till you get to your desired bedtime.
She gets cuddles between 7 & 9, you can enjoy your daughter, and bed can be about what it should be, a place to quickly, and securely fall asleep.
Good luck to you and yours.
F. B.
Often times, this is because she doesn't feel like she gets enough cuddle time from you during the day, according to childhood expert Dr. Sears. She needs that time... try spreading it out a bit more after work so it isn't all for bedtime. I wouldn't say this is separation anxiety at all, just her wanting to spend more time with you and to drag out bedtime. Dr. Sears does have some really good ideas about bedtime help here:
http://askdrsears.com/topics/parenting/sleep-problems
My children never went through separation anxiety, but it is very common, especially amongst this age.
yes and it comes and goes in phases at different ages.
Normal.
Separation Anxiety... is not something that occurs by the clock or only at daytime or night time.
It just occurs.
Also though, when a baby/child is tired.... they do often get more clingy. Because they are tired. And being tired means they want or need comforting or Mommy. Normal.
And sometimes they just need time with Mommy... and before bed is when a child gets sentimental for Mommy.
to answer your title question: no, not all children go thru separation anxiety. I was blessed with two sons who managed to avoid it! & I rejoiced then....& now!
I would not consider what your DD is doing to be considered separation anxiety. Is she overtired? Does she nap adequately during the day? At 18months, it's iffy as to whether she needs 1 or 2 naps daily...but she definitely needs some!
Sooo that would be the 1st step for me: make sure she's napping well & isn't overtired at any point. Next, change up your bedtime routine. That 2 hour time period is ridiculous & only you can change it. Stand firm & let her know that she has to cooperate with you. :)
This is the time period in life where you're setting the standards & benchmarks......it only gets harder as they get older.
I don't know about ALL children, but what you're describing is utterly and completely normal. One small suggestion might be for you to sort of endow a stuffed animal with magical comforting powers. This might not take right away, but by the time she's 2, it could make bedtime a lot easier.
