Infant Will NOT Sleep Alone!!

You should get a sounds within the womb bear or other sounds within the womb stuffed animal, mine had like a velcro attachment so it could be in the crib w/o me fearing he would smother on it, but I did do a lot of co-sleeping in the early months.

Sounds like a typical little human. Remember that as humans, we are programmed to gravitate toward our parents - they are safety, security, warmth, love and food.

The vast, VAST majority of the world breastfeeds and co-sleeps. Humans are one of the most social of all mammals. Human infants are considered "infants" until the age of 8 years old. Remember he is VERY young. If we were meant to be so independent as to sleep in a cold bed away from our parents at 12 month of age, then why on earth don't we send them to college when they are 12???

Enjoy him - he simply understands that he is safest and most secure snuggled with his mommy. Someday, he will want nothing to do with being cuddled by mom and sleeping in your bed. All children are different, but most boobie-fed babies are tightly bonded to their parents and need the one-on-one closeness of their parents until they fully wean.

Peace!
:)

It sounds like a tough situation. It sounds like you're probably done having kids?? If so, then is there any reason why you can't let him co-sleep until he feels more comfortable sleeping by himself? He's sending you a pretty clear message that he doesn't feel okay by himself. Some people are just born hardwired to be more needful of physical contact. My husband and younger son are like this. They both just need regular physical contact with me to feel comfortable. My little one is going to be 3 in September and he still sleeps with us for half of the night. He goes to bed in his room, in his toddler bed and comes in bed with us in the middle of the night. That's okay with us. We get some private time at bedtime and he gets what he needs. He'll grow out of it eventually. No kid ever went to college still co-sleeping with mom and dad! lol! Let him be little, enjoy his babyhood and don't make him grow up too fast.

I really believe in Attachment Parenting and co-sleeping is part of that for sure. Check it out. Maybe it's what he needs.... :)

At the risk of appearing like I'm only looking for sales... In addition to several good answers you have received another thing that might work is to have a voice in the room. I have a CD of stories that while was created with older children in mind, some of my clients pay it for new born and toddler age children, to help soothe them at sleep time. Of course the CD ends and you are back to square one, a talk radio station might help. I too had a child that woke many times every night (the record was 20). And would cry till I got out of bed and found the bink or bottle of water and gave it to him. I personally don't believe in putting babies in my bed (not on a regular basis or as a means of getting them to fall asleep). Another thing that might help is a small fish tank with enough fish (half a dozen goldfish would do). The light and movement of the fish are calming. Actually if he follows the fish with his eyes, that will help him fall asleep (like the old counting sheep jump over the fence idea... it mimics rem movements and tricks the brain to sleep). Also the water sounds can be soothing. While it is exhausting now, he will out grow it, particularly if he was able to sleep before he was weaned. Hang in there, and get some time to yourself. Sounds like you should have enough people who can help watch him while you get a nap or a movie or any time away for yourself so that you have the emotional energy to get through this phase.

It sounds like you have a good plan. My son did not sleep through the night until I night weaned him at 14 mts old. He sleep with us until around 20 mts ( but is still welcomed in if he wakes up in the night and he is two.). We found that he stopped needing us to hang out with him until he was soundly asleep once we established a predictable bedtime routine and he felt comfortable in his crib. The "baby whisperer" says that a baby left to CIO in their crib may have trust issues and need a lot of trust building before they are comfortable in their cribs. We also read "no cry sleep solution". Which was very helpful...although we did have some crying during the night weaning...never alone though. Just wanted to let you know your not alone in this.

sounds like he needs some extra reasurrance and mommy time. Let him have that time now, it will make it easier for you both later on. Even if that means he sleeps with you for awhile.

The book that was the most helpful for me was Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Weissbluth. It gives you lots of specific suggestions and has chapters dedicated to each age range when sleep patterns tend to change so you can read up on what is probably going on developmentally and what to expect at the next stage (for example, some children are ready to switch to 1 nap at 1 year and if they continue to take 2 it causes sleep disruption). He is a proponent of CIO (he offers a variety of options - from straight CIO to checking on them every 5 min, etc), which is sounds like you are willing to do (I was 100% sure that I would NOT do CIO until my daughter would not fall asleep no matter what we did - even nursing stopped working after a while) but you have to be consistent and commit to a certain time frame, all of which is laid out in the book. Some of the best advice I've heard is to ask yourself 2 questions - have you reached your limit (you are no longer willing to continue to do what you are doing currently)? and are you ready to pass the responsibility of falling asleep to your child (or do you want to continue to have to "put him to sleep")? Good luck and consider yourself blessed to have never had to deal with this before! Happy sleeping.

Does he sleep better/longer at night after a "full day" out? I don't know for sure, but I would try a busy day playing outside, fresh air and a big, heavy dinner. Maybe that can help turn the tides for you?

I'm not doing much better here with my 8 mo old. He still wakes frequently at night. Luckily he does sleep in his crib. But I'm tired of being woken up several times a night.

What is your son's naptime routine? Does he sleep in his crib? Motionless? Of all the sleep books I've read, they tout sleep begets sleep. So I'd try to "schedule" him as much as you can with so many other kids, have a bedtime and naptime routine, and perhaps give him something like a Gloworm that he can "play" with when he wakes. I've been trying to not go right into my son when he wakes. He's been learning to amuse himself a bit which I'm hoping leads to self play and back to sleep!

I agree with the prior post, try to ride it out if nothing else works.

Sorry I'm not of more help.

One more suggestion to add. Your son might be a little young for this, but it worked like a charm for our son who still wanted to nurse to sleep at 18 months. He loved raisins, so when we went to put him in bed, we told him that if he could just lay there quietly for 1 minute, we would bring him a raisin. He did it, so then we waited a little longer for the next one. By the time we had stretched it out to 10 minutes, he would fall asleep waiting. It made bedtime a fun game, not something to fear. We were consistent with this for several weeks. Most nights it worked, some he held out for nursing, but he did eventually learn to put himself to sleep and stay in bed all night. He WILL get there, don't worry!

Oh that sounds very hard for you! I'm not a fan of cry it out myself, it was too hard for me to listen too. And I'm also not a fan of parenting books, however, the Baby Whisperer saved my life and the life of my daughter. She's got excellent tips on sleep training and getting your little one on a schedule. If for nothing else, she helps you see that it's ok and you'll figure it out. You love him and your a good Momma, and adjustments are all that are needed.

That being said, check the kind of formula he's on. My second daughter had horrible stomach troubles with 5 out of 6 formula's we used. They are a little harder to digest than your breast milk and the problem could be a tummy thing. And if all else fails, talk to your doctor, they're good as sounding boards and may have other ideas.

Hang in there, you'll figure it out. And like I say over and over, no matter what happens he won't still need you to cuddle him at 16, so cherish the moments. :)

In addition to the other suggestions:
at each age juncture, a child still needs to 'bond' with their Mom. Not just as a baby. At each age, 'separation anxiety' and the need to bond are expressed/manifested differently. It is normal.

Also, he is at a 'growth-spurt' period. So hunger increases. A growth spurt occurred at 9 months old, then 12 months old, then 15 months old. Every 3 months is a 'growth-spurt' period in a child/baby. So, if he started this at 9 months old... that was a growth-spurt time for him... and if not getting adequate intake, daily, then their intake is not keeping pace with their nutritional and intake needs. 3 months ago, when he was 9 months old, is when you weaned him. He seems hungry.

Also, maybe he is teething?

Also, at each age change, a child goes through tweaks in their sleep. It is a phase and as they hit milestones and developmental changes in cognition and motor skills.

Also at this age, "night terrors" usually comes up. It is normal. Look it up online.

They are going through MANY changes at this age. They can't help it. Nor can we extinguish it because it is developmental based.

Does he have a lovey? A night-light?

Does he still nap? Because an over-tired child, actually sleeps worse and has a harder time falling asleep and staying asleep. Kids this age STILL need to nap, daily.
And before bed, allow him to wind-down first. My kids take about 1/2 hour to wind-down before bed. It is a part of our routine. And we make things all quiet... before bed.

all the best,
Susan

Does your 1 year old have a stuffed animal that he likes? Sometimes that will help if you let them sleep with one. Also a shirt or something that smells like you in the crib can be comforting. If you have a play-yard you could try putting it in your room and having him sleep in that and gain distance gradually. It just doesn't feel right for him to be away from you yet. You were always his source of comfort before and he doesn't understand why that is changing. My older daughter started sucking her thumb as soon as I weaned her and that was her form of self-soothing. Also my daughter sleeps through the night better if the room is a little warmer since she tends to kick her blankets off. Good luck I hope it works out for you I know how frustrating it can be!