Does Husb Roughplay with the Kids?

My kids roughplay with my husband. I swear one of these days they are going to break him. :p

All fun and games until someone goes to the hospital. :)

They all seem to enjoy it and it doesn't bother me. Just wish they would give the poor man fair warning when they are about to attack.

my husband does play too rough occasionally. I think that men just dont know their own strength when they get into play mode. When he really gets into it, someone is always sent to me crying, but unless there is blood, I just send them right back and tell them it was their choice to do so and that it was an accident. My dad did it with us, and just like with my husband and kids, we always carried it too far. Because of my dad's strength and toughness we thought we could use him as a punching bag, trampoline, target practice and you name it, so he just gave back what he got. We learned quickly what is acceptable and what wasnt. Was I scarred for life? nope and it lets me understand why my husband does it or why it happens. I think its good to do, builds character, and like a mothers role, I am there worrying about it and constantly saying to "be careful" and "not too rough!"

I do think many dads do rough play. I always had to remind my husband to be careful.. and I better not hear any crying, from her or from him, hee, hee.

Also I told him, if she was saying to stop.. to stop. That this is when she was going to be learning, we really do listen to her.

Or if she was saying it hurt, she was afraid, or whatever,,. to really believe her. and to stop.

My Husband horse plays with our kids.
But he is not overly "rough." He mostly just is silly with them and horse plays.
And if one of them says "ow" or they don't want to, then fine, my Husband stops.
I have a son and daughter.

The key thing is, my kids can tell him to stop, and he will.

Mine was a pretty rowdy player, the boys would laugh and giggle throughout the entire horseplay event, me knowing all the while that someone would end up crying before it was all said and done, which was usually the case.
Never stopped the boys from wanting to play with Daddy again the next time tho.
So, yep, I remember cringing, but usually didnt interrupt. It helped my kids to toughen up .... I think that's why dads often play that way.

without having done the research myself, i agree with mallory P about it being really useful in their development. i don't think it's "necessary" necessarily, but i do think it's a key part of their relationship with dad, learning boundaries, physical exercise, etc. my husband is not a 'baby person', so to see him bonding with our son this way instead is good for me - even if i do have to leave the room (and i usually do).

my husband taught my son all he has to do is ask. usually it's the tickling that goes overboard - and my son will say, "Daddy please stop tickling me!" and then it stops, no question. as long as he knows daddy will stop when it's too much, i am fine with it.

If you google this you will find that roughhousing is actually a necessary component to development-esp for little boys. I used to hate it too until I found this out. Just leave the room-thats what I do.

Yes, it used to terrify me and annoy me because they would use our bed and leave a mess. But not so rough that it bothered the boys or they wanted it to stop. It just bothered me. If all three of them (husband and two boys) participated the youngest almost always got a little banged up (nothing serious) because the older boy would get too rough.

Hubs and I both wrestle with our DS (18 months old). I also lead the way in a sofa cushion obstacle course. Hubs tosses DS and swings him upside down from his ankles. I won't do much of the tossing or swinging anymore because he's gotten heavy enough that I don't trust myself not to drop him.

I used to wrestle and have tickle sessions with my dad. I never thought it was out of place. I don't see my hubs or I as doing anything inappropriate or too rough.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

I always rough housed with my kids when they wanted to or as a dad and kids thing. We'd wrestle on the den floor (our play room). I started doing this when my oldest was still in diapers. I'd cause my lips to buzz and buzz his neck causing him to laugh. He loved it. When video camers were invented and I could afford one I'd set up the video camera and got it on tape. As my kids were born and could walk they would join in.

I would have two or three kids laughing and occasionaly crying. The crying one usually went to mom for hug and a kiss on the "owee". When they finished getting their hug and kiss from mom, they would run over to where the other kids and I were usually still laughing and wrestling so they could get back in the fray.

I would "pin" my kids and count to 10 and then blow a buzz on their tummy or neck and they would giggle or laugh and tell dad, "STOP". Then I would stop and move on to the next kid. When I had one kid encolsed in my arms, the other kids would grab my arms or legs and pull to help the "prisoner" escape. Often more than one would end up on my back and I would let the "prisioner" escape and do pushups with the ones that happened to be on my back. They loved it. Usually the crying would start because someone couldn't get on my back because there wasn't room. So I'd roll over and "capture" the cryer and tickle and hug and buzz their neck until they laughed or giggled. We had a wonderful time.

At one time I had six kids on my back and legs while I did pushups with them. They loved it. I went through ranger training when I was in ROTC in college and went through Airborne training when I was in the Army so I could do lots of pushups when I was younger. In Airborne training it wasn't uncommon to have to run their one mile asphault track three miles in a row in 18 minutes (that was the maximum acceptable time) and then be ordered into the sawdust pits for more calestantics and pushups. I remember that at the time we soldiers would count out pushups and situps and know we wuldn't be done until we had done at least 100 of each.

I think the first time they pinned dad during our play wrestling session was when I had 7 kids on me. My youngest was in diapers and could barely walk, but my oldest 2 were in high school. When they did it they all had to go and tell mom that they pinned dad.

I could write more, but my eyes are misting over and its hard to see the key board.

Ye3s, dad's wrestle with kids. I feel sory for the people that only have one or two kids. They will never know what they missed.

Good luck to you and yours.

Mine never has, that's not really his style, but I know a lot of dads like to play like this.
As long as your kids are laughing, having fun and not getting hurt then it's probably not too rough.

no, but i've got a BIL who's in the secret service, and he really had a hard time reining it in when my boys were tweens and teens. i guess he figured they weren't *little* so they were up for it, but their idea of clowning around had way more parameters than his. when they mentioned that they were afraid to get in the pool when uncle michael was there i had a quiet, low-key word with him and it was fine.
i'm assuming you've had conversations with your dh about this? what's his response? does he dismiss your concerns, or does he feel that he's NOT being rough, or that your kids 'need' it, or what?
khairete
S.

Yes but he calls it career training! My son says that he wants to be in the UFC when he grows up. My husband is a former fighter. I don't see anything wrong with it. In fact I can't wait to see my little guy fight as a pro one day :)

My husband does not, because it is not in his personality at all. He's just not a physical guy that way.

One thing I'd like to add: Your husband needs to be aware that with your daughter, there will come an age when she will become uncomfortable with roughhousing with dad, or with anyone. She will want space and won't want to be rough. She also will be upset if she feels he's disappointed in her or upset with her if she doesn't feel like roughhousing any more with him and brother. It's just typical development but you should keep an eye on her and make sure your husband doesn't give her any pressure along the lines of "Oh, come on, don't be a spoilsport, don't be all 'girly' on me." Even said in fun, things like that can make a young girl feel very conflicted about doing what she always did as a younger kid, and doing what she feels comfortable with as she gets a little older. Just something to keep in the back of your mind.

And if it ever gets to a point the kids seem to want to avoid it, or are tired of it, but they seem to go ahead anyway just because dad thinks it's fun -- it's time to stop.

Actually we both do. Our son was already so muscular and tough when he was born (holding his head up two days after birth), that I started throwing him around when he was two weeks old. My husband was a bit more cautious, but realized soon that the little guy loves it. So we play rough a lot, maybe because we are young parents also and just naturally behave this way. I think as long as the kids are having fun and laughing it is fine and toughens them up a bit.

Yes, we have 2 girls-age 6 and 7 and they LOVE to rough house with Daddy. I usually have to leave the room, because to me, they play a little too rough. They do end up getting hurt a little sometimes and end up crying, but then they still want to do it. My hubby says it is good for them to learn to be a little tough. I do believe that maybe some of it is good. It's just a little too much for me sometimes. My dad never played rough with me like that.

Yes and I don't care for rough housing. I think it encourages bad, aggressive behavior even if it's done in a playful manner. Call me overprotective or a Debby Downer, but I'm just not a fan of rough housing:)

Oh yea, we all do, hubby is way more rough then me, but me and my husband also rough house. (when im not prego). Both of my kids are girls, and they love it, they are more rough then he is, but they tag team him, so.. I feel sorry for him when when this baby gets big enough to play, he will get it by all 4 of us girls lol...

nope he is the teddy bear and ref for the younger ones who go to their big brothers to do it.

He never did it with my older boys, I would. he never felt comfortable crossing those boundries.

Yes! I sit back and watch the things the two of them do and laugh! My son is 17 months old and is already a dare devil and a rough and tumble boy. He and Daddy wrestle which is hilarious because my husband was a great wrestler in high school.

No. my husband wasn't like that but he didn't have a dad or brothers to roughhouse with growing up either. He's not really that kind of guy.

We roughplay with our son, but not too rough. My hubby is pretty big, so I think he's kinda careful. And once the kids aren't laughing, it's time to stop. If your kiddos are having fun and not getting hurt, it's ok. If they don't like it and he doesn't stop, then it's a problem.

Nope, just not his personality. He taught them many other things, but fighting and rough housing just isn't "him".