Dominicks Employee Told Me I Should Be Feeding My Baby Breastmilk Not Formula..

Oh boy, which Dominicks so I know not to go there when my next baby is born? 63rd & Kingery, or Cass & Ogden?

That is terrible! I have never had a complete stranger tell me that, but some attachment parenting moms I know have said it to me when they saw me mixing formula at a playgroup. Must be nice to be able to judge, right?

You should complain. You every right to complain, then if a woman was told not to breastfeed. I would have called the second I left.

You ought to write a letter to the manager's home office and complain about it. He had no business saying that to you. It's none of his business, in the first place. And there's nothing wrong with formula, in the second place.

Dawn

This stinks. While I am a bf-ing advocate, I got a nasty taste of judgment when I went to a natural health store to get some relief from my engorged breasts when my milk came in after my first child was stillborn. I didn't explain my situation...it was the first time I ventured out of my house after the delivery...and the owner treated me very shortly bc he assumed that I had just chosen not to breastfeed. He hardly spoke to me. I knew what he was thinking and managed to keep it together until he asked me "so how old is the baby" and I had to tell him. It was clear he felt sheepish, but offered NO apology. He did give me the supplements for free, though. Thanks?

Long story short: No one knows the whole story, nor are they entitled to. You'll receive plenty of judgment about all things kids and parenting, but take it with a grain of salt knowing that no one else is walking in your shoes.

I'm so sorry E.! I have had many bad experiences with people being cruel when I was using formula.

Once a waitress loudly berated me in a restaurant.
A woman followed me through Wal-Mart yelling "Poison, poison!!"
Another woman working at a coffee shop that I was familiar with said in a hateful voice, " I never took you for a poison giver", and went on an on about how lazy I was for not breastfeeding. (For the record, I DID breastfeed and supplement, because of major problems)

Two of the women listed above were La Leche League leaders. They were the most hateful of all. I had many more bad experiences and it really ruined me for awhile. Thankfully, I was able to realize that breastfeeding didn't define me as a good mom! :)

My friend had to quit breastfeeding because of the meds she was taking that she absolutely needed. A La Leche League leader told her that her baby should be taken away and that if medication was more important than her child, she didn't deserve to be a mother. My friend attempted suicide, convinced that her baby would be better off without her. Thankfully she survived!!!! She's a great mom!

No offense to the wonderful people out there involved in LLL. I am sure that great, compassionate people involved in the organization do exist. If you are one of those- keep up the good work!

E., I am sorry that you experienced that. Complain to the corporate office! I am appalled at the disgusting behavior of that manager.

***Edit.... why is it so hard for some of you to believe this story? Do you think only breastfeeding moms get uncalled for opinions and narrow minded comments? I am disgusted by the disbelief.

I nursed my son and am VERY proud of my accomplishment. BUT, that doesn't make me less proud of moms who don't nurse.

I have actually seen people give a hard time for BFing - day care workers, none the less! I listened to them "warn" a BFing mom that "breastfed babies are harder to feed because they don't like bottles". It does go both ways.

I can't believe the experiences of some who answered - it is absolutely unacceptable, in my opinion, for people to comment on something like this! I am an advocate for BFing, but I also understand that there are many reasons one might not be able to do it/make it work.
I hope you do make a complaint. I think the "higher ups" need to know who they have working for them and that their job isn't to comment on people's purchases.

I had a few people tell me that when my babies were little. If they were strangers, I sarcastically thanked them for their sage counsel and told them I knew what was best for my baby.

I would encourage you to email the president of Dominick's and complain. The manager had no business telling you what to feed your baby. Hopefully the president of the company can sort this out with her and educate her on proper etiquette when dealing with customers.

I chose to formula feed. I felt very strongly that parenting is an equal partnership and that DH should have an equal role in feeding and bonding. I never had anyone comment and I never felt judged.

Next time you might try: "Oh, can I have your phone number?" Why? Because the next time I need a complete stranger to tell me how to raise my child I want to be able to call you". Big smile.

I would have handed him the containers and said "Oh, I didn't know that you were also a doctor. What are you doing managing a store? Thanks for letting me know!" and walked away. They didn't deserve your money!

Everyone has an opinion about something. You just have to say your piece and let it go. I was paying for something and I had my daughter with me. It was the middle of the day (we homeschool) and the person behind the counter made a rude remark about socialization. I said "I don't think I need your advice on how to raise my daughter" and then I left my unpaid purchases and walked away.

Good luck! You are a good mommy, no matter what you feed your baby. It's all about love.

"MYOB"- "Mind your own business".

It's a common saying in my family.

Shame on that person for judging you. You are a good and loving mommy.

Virtual hugs to you!

I would contact the home office of that company and let him know what the manager said....

As others have said, there are a LOT of reasons a mother isn't breastfeeding......

It was none of his business, and he shouldn't have said ANYTHING!

Also.... tell the company that you will be purchasing your formula elsewhere... THAT is what really counts.

Wow, I probably would have left whatever it was that I was planning to purchase on the counter and after a few choice words, walked out and never set foot in the store again.

I chose to use formula from the get go 18 yrs ago and my hubby along with my Ob had to call security on the BF nazis because they tried to not allow formula in my room. NOT a nice scenerio and protocol was changed at the hospital after my experience.

I have no problem if someone chooses to BF or formula feed. Just keep your opinion to yourself because I chose the best route for my family.

FYI I have a very healthy daughter with very little health issues as she has grown up.

I would also complain to upper management of the store.

People can be idiots and I'm sorry it happened to you. Unfortunately, it's just the beginning. Everyone is going to have an opinion about how you can raise your child better.

Whenever someone says something completely inappropriate to me, I say, "I'm sorry, what did you say?" in a polite, pretty-sure-I-didn't-hear-what-I-think-I-just-heard voice. People will rarely say it twice.

As for the manager, I would email up the chain of command as high as I could go, telling them what happened. I doubt you are the first mother this manager has imparted his/her vast wisdom upon and I'm sure the store is losing customers they don't even know about.

I bottle fed my children and I am VERY proud of my accomplishment. They are healthy, loved, and happy. I received a lot of grief from the nursingnazis at the hospital.

Through no fault of my own, I could not breastfeed. I tried everything and finally had to throw in the towel because I could not produce milk and I tried EVERYTHING. It really affected my birth experience and it was all I could do to get out of the hospital and away from these awful people.

How you choose to feed your child is nobody's business but your own. Please take the time to send a letter to the corporate offices. I am so sorry that you had to go through this... shake it off and continue to do what you know is best!

If you shouldn't be feeding it to your child, why is his store selling it? I'd definitely complain.

God what an idiot. I'm glad I wasn't with you or I would have torn into that goober.

There are always people out there who will insult you for using formula. That doesn't mean they are right, smart, or in any way better than you. If formula is what works best for you, then that is what you should use.

As for how to respond, I'd have said very rudely that it was none of his business and left to purchase the formula somewhere else. He's not worthy of your business.

I had two separate La Leche League "consultants" tell me I was abusing my children and should give them up for adoption if I wasn't going to do the very best for them and breastfeed.

I gave both "ladies" very explicit directions on where to go and exactly how to get there.

Edited to add: The unsolicited advice definitely comes from both sides of the aisle. and YES complete strangers (including employees of stores) have given me their "opinion" on what I should and should not be doing for/with/about my children.

As for nurses/medical professionals "pushing" anything .. that is a HUGE no no ... our jobs as nurses are to take care of and educate our patients. Then we leave it up to them. This has been drilled into my head already and I'm only in my first semester of nursing school.

In fact NO ONE should PUSH anything on anyone.

A friend of mine was told by the check out girl at Walmart that she breastfed and her daughter didn't have a cold until she was more than 18 months old. As if it was any of her business why she couldn't or wouldn't breastfeed! I was lucky to not have anyone tell me I should be breastfeeding, although I've had breastfeeding friends imply that they were better than me.

Wow, I am so sorry, that was so uncalled for. I think a call to the General Manager is in order, I cannot believe that!

I formula fed my son and it was "implied" to me several times by the nurse at the hospital that I SHOULD be breastfeeding..... I was a bit taken back since a nurse should be completely aware that for many different reasons NOT all women can breastfeed...

Next time say, "Thanks, Hippy, hey, since you're so into natural wholistc nutrition, you must feed your whole family an organic vegan diet-any other tips or recipes?"

And if your'e not in a funny, generous mood, complain to the company in writing and include that jerk's name in your formal complaint. I was adopted and never nursed and my mom and/or dad would have read that kook the riot act.

Militant breast feeders with unsolicited comments are uber annoying.

I didn't formula feed my boys. I did my daughter. oh well.

If you were that offended - which it sounds like you were - I would have called the General Manager right then and expressed my displeasure and his or her employee's comments about my choice in how I care for my child.

I don't care if you formula feed or breast feed - you need to take care of your child and if that's how you choose to do it - so be it. Do. not. ever. let someone make you feel less for your choice.

Complain. I am sorry the person was inconsiderate. We have a lot of inconsiderate people in the world. Why not consider the source of the comment and press on?

I know where you're coming from. I wanted to breast feed but couldn't because I wasn't able to produce milk. No one told me about the milk registrys, where you can buy human milk for your child. After 6 months of age, my daughter developed an allergy to cow's milk and had to use another alternative milk (we decided on soy; at the time, I didn't know about goat's milk. Otherwise I would have used that).

So who's to say that she wouldn't have become allergic to breast milk if she developed an allergy to cow's milk? She could have become "allergic" to me because I ate cow dairy; it's been known to happen. However, we'll never know because I couldn't produce any milk for her to drink anyway.

Yes, I got plenty of stares and whispers when people saw me feeding her formula. She was a preemie, needed to drink/eat, and I couldn't give her what she needed. So she got formula so that she could grow and thrive.

You do what you have to do for your child.

And I would report that employee. They have no business being rude to you or expressing their opinion on formula vs breast feeding when they don't know all the facts behind the decision.

It hurt me when people made snap decisions or voiced their opinion about "breast feeding is best for the child" when they hadn't walked a day in my shoes. For us, at that moment in time, formula feeding was the best option for our child.

And I would have said "and you shouldn't be dyeing your hair because there are cancer causing chemicals in it and natural & gray is best..." and looked at her in a serious dead-pan look.

I nursed both my kids.
I never felt better than anyone else, formula fed or not.

Some people are idiots! No matter what you are doing there's some Yahoo who is more than willing to tell you, you are doing it wrong. This is especially true when it comes to parenting.

There are always invasive, opinionated people that don't have enough class to not verbally annoy strangers. A shop manager insulting a customer is even worse.

If you had been nursing your child in a sling while shopping, chances are some stranger would have commented on that.

You can't win either way, so what you do is grow a thick skin, roll your eyes and go about your day.

So many folks said, I can't believe that... Hmmm, me either. I hope I'm wrong but this just seems like another one of those posts meant to stir the pot and upset a bunch of moms.

You know when I felt superior about breastfeeding? In my early 20s. That's how mature his opinion is.

Complain in writing to the store manager and the chain president, now. Be sure to send the manager who made the comment a copy of the letter you are sending to the chain headquarters -- so he or she knows that you have complained to those over his or her head.

It was utterly out of line. Grocery store employees in some chains are actually trained NOT to make any comments whatsoever on customers' purchases and this is an example of why smart stores have this policy.

I wonder if this person would have had the sheer gall to tell someone "you should be buying more fresh fruits and vegetables" only to have the person say, "I'm currently on chemotherapy and can't eat raw stuff." (Chemo patients often can't have raw fruit or veg.) In other words -- this person doesn't have a clue why someone is buying what they're buying.

The FIRST person to hand me a can of formula was my lactation consultant. No judgement from her; she knew I wasn't producing enough milk and told me not to feel in any way bad about the biological fact that my body wasn't going to let me breastfeed. The guy in the store has no idea why you may need that formula. If someone had said that to me, I might have lost it and conked him on the head with the can of formula, since he would have no idea how hard we tried to breastfeed instead. What a jerk. Be sure to report him higher up than just the local store.

Eh, you know what they say about opinions...

They're like a$$holes - everyone's got one.

Some people have very strong feelings on this topic, so this probably won't be the first time you get unsolicited advice on parenting. You know you're doing the right thing for your child and situation, so who cares what others think? Once you take that attitude, parenting will become A LOT easier.

Wow. That was extremely rude, judgmental and unprofessional. I know hindsight is 20/20, but I hope I would have said something like "Sir, what is your name? And what is your supervisor's name? I'll be writing a letter to your corporate headquarters outlining your extremely unprofessional remarks. Perhaps in the future you'd be better served keeping your judgmental views to yourself."

What an a$$h0le.

The next time some stranger in the supermarket decides to offer editorial comments on the contents of your cart, tell him/her that when you need their opinion, you will be sure to assign them one.

Yes, breast milk is the best food for baby, but some women can't/don't wish to breast feed. That's not the business of the store manager.

I do find this hard to believe, but if it actually happened, I would've been complaining to the manager. When I am wronged by a company, corporation, etc, I make sure the right person knows and corrects it. I can GUARANTEE you, I would've had that formula for free.

Happened to me at Walmart a couple years ago when Similac had their recalls. I was in there exchanging some cans of my daughters formula (she was not strong enough to breastfeed and has a milk protien allergy) and the customer service employee decided to make a similar comment. I called the store and spoke to the store manager about this innapropriate comment and she was later fired (this was not my goal just didnt want anyone else to get offended by this woman). If this was the manager i would call the corporate office.

I can not believe that the manager said that to you! wow. I am shocked and have never heard of this happening. Sorry it happened to you!

YEs You do what you want, don't let anyone put you down for feeding your child your way. You are a good mom and don't let anyone put you down or make you feel bad for this decision. THere are sensitive formulas out there for babies with allergies. I didn't breat feed 2 of my kids and they had allergies, I breast fed the last one and she had worse allergies and pneumonia than the other 2. SO breast feeding isnt the answer here it is genetics. Good Luck

I would let the store manager know so this person doesn't insult another person. That was terrribly rude and judgemental.

E.,

I am a breastfeeding mom--BUT.....I feel so strongly that families should do what works best for their babies. I don't judge those that formula feed. If your son does well with formula and you choose to feed him that way, that should be your decision and yours alone.

I am so shocked that this person told you this!!! They don't know you or your son's health history! Write a letter to the store, the manager, then insist on speaking to the president as well---this is unacceptable.

I have been confronted several times as breastfeeding mom. So I know it is on both ends of the spectrum. Either way, no one has the right to tell you that you should feed your baby in a certain way. You are the mama, you make the decisions.

I do not tattle but I threaten to tattle when an employee makes errors at a store/business. I don't tattle because we all have bad days and what goes around is said to come around.

Since the manager was not offering any helpful solutions, this was really uncalled for. I would report it since any employee commenting on personal issues is unprofessional. That being said, a nurse at the hospital has a responsibility to encourage breastfeeding and helping a new mother. No one should be offended when a medical professional reccomends and even pushes breastfeeding. I would also not be offended if someone in a store comments on formula. When my son was 1 month old I was supplementing because he was ALWAYS hungry. A woman in line asked me about the formula and reccomended ways to improve my milk production naturally. It worked and I am so grateful for her.