Done with the Crib - Close the Door? Gate the Door?

Updated on October 16, 2011
H.1. asks from Des Moines, IA
15 answers

We are about to transition my 17 month old out of his crib and into his toddler bed. He sleeps well and puts himself to sleep. We always kiss goodnight and shut the door behind us. However, I do anticipate he may enjoy his new freedom and may not stay in his bed without crib rails to keep him in and want to play in his room or come out to see us. We live in a ranch home with a finished basement and after he's in bed we may be on the main level (and he could see/hear us well from his room over a gate) or we may be in the basement, in which case the main level would be darkened and quiet.

My question is: do we continue to close his door? My worry is that I'm trapping him in there and he will bang on the door (can't open doors yet) and is this okay? Just allow him to eventually give up and lay down in bed? Or keep door open and have a gate so he can't escape the room? My worry with that is he isn't use to shutting out noises and lights as typically sleeps with a closed door and we would be a distraction to him. I do like being able to peek in on him though with a gate - whereas with the door he would notice if I wanted to check on him.

I always hear about placing them back in bed when they come out - is this just fol older kids who can climb gates and open doors? My little guy can do neither.

Also - if he is in his room but not in his bed do I let this be and only react if he is coming out of the room? Or if he is wandering around the room playing should I place him back in bed?

Any experience with the logistics of this transition are appreciated. thanks!

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

I will add on to what Dawn said. You can place a nob cover on the inside door nob.

If he gets out of bed, but is quiet, leave him alone. Some children may even fall asleep on the floor and that is fine. It is HIS room, so if it is set up safely
You really have nothing to worry about.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

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J.G.

answers from Cleveland on

When I first take them out of a crib we put a gate on the door & put the mattress on the floor. That way if they roll they have less of a hall.

As for the out of bed - we would let them play a little if they were being quite, but would try to get them to sleep within about an hour of putting them down. Once the gate was gone - they liked coming out for kisses and hugs a lot, so we limited the number of kisses & hugs they could come get per night.

Remember you are changing the routen, it will take a little while to get it in order & running smoothly again.

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E.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

My sons was 2 1/2 when he moved to a toddler bed so he could already open doors. We started with closing the door just like we had when he was in the crib but put up a gate in case he opened the door. He kept opening the door. One night I asked him if he wanted me to leave the door open and he said yes. He rarely get out of bed any more. So it may depend on your son. If he does get out of bed, we tell him to go back to bed.

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R.D.

answers from Richmond on

I used to gate the door for a while, then gave up; they could climb over it (the girls, I mean, when they were young).

I HIGHLY recommend putting the door knob on, inside out though, so your little one doesn't lock himself in ;)

The word 'no' is going to be priceless as he learns what he can and can not get into if he does happen to wander out of his room. Be prepared for him to pull everything out of every drawer! Then teach him how to put it all back ;) Make sure he's got some toys and books in there so he can entertain himself, rather than roaming the house without you.

Good luck, it's an exciting time for you both! :)

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think you should continue with your present routine. He will not understand the change of leaving the door open. Just make sure you have his room baby proofed, screw any shelves to the wall on top with L brackets, attach the individual shelves by using smaller ones too, make sure every toy is picked up that may have smaller parts like toy cars with wheels or steering wheels that may pop off, make sure your plug covers are all still plugging the socket, etc...then make sure the baby monitor is turned on so you can listen in if he does get up and start playing. That way you can make sure when he does go to sleep you can check and make sure he's on the bed.

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M.2.

answers from Chicago on

I would continue to close the door after putting LO down for the night - stick with your usual routine. This is exactly what we do! We also live in a ranch home with a finished basement, which is where my hubby disappears to most evenings once the kids are in bed and I usually stay upstairs. I keep her door closed until we actually go to bed at night and then I put up the gate just in case she wakes up during the night and we don't hear her I really don't want her roaming the house :) I don't like either of my kids to sleep with their door closed - it makes me nervous that they'll need me and I won't hear them or something! Also, if you stick with keeping the door shut I'd just let your LO cry / scream it out in their room - they will eventually tire out and fall sleep. It was funny the first few nights my youngest dd was out of her crib - she'd scream and cry until she'd finally fallen asleep and she'd be sleeping on her hardwood floor, up against the door, half on / half off her bed! Or maybe you're LO will be like my oldest daughter and stay in the toddler bed the first night, exactly like she was told to do :)

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M.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

I put a gate in his doorway. I felt bad closing the door on him. Good luck with the transition..it is really hard for most kids. It took us a couple of months to transition from crib to bed. No matter how tired he was he could not stand the temptation of getting out of his bed :-)

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K.C.

answers from Cleveland on

I say just gate his door. He can see you, and he will maybe feel better.

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A.W.

answers from Seattle on

I would just do exactly what you did before, close the door. If he gets out of bed, he might just do it to check things out and then go to bed or fall asleep on the floor. Keep the routine as similar as before. If you can always use a monitor. My daughter is 5 and we still have one in her room because when we are downstairs, I can't hear her.

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Just wanted to add:

Could you start w/a baby gate?
That way you could peer in on him to see exactly what he's doing but he can't get out if he's young enough not to be able to climb over it just yet.

A.J.

answers from Williamsport on

We "trained" all of ours to stay in bed, but they were 2 years old. You know if your son is able to comprehend this yet-it worked with ours because we were consistent with ALL rules, so it was just another basic they didn't push. They got one chance to get out of bed and come say hi, then taken back to bed with the "final warning" that they needed to stay in bed. A consequence would follow if they got out again, but with the general consistency, only one of the three kids ever pushed it past that point. We also allowed them to get out and play quietly as long as they didn't leave the room. For us, we just needed their day to be over, and NOT come back out and bug us during movie time! They learned to just get back in bed. I think once one fell asleep on the floor and needed moving back to bed. We never baby proofed the house or used any gates or shut doors. Kids can learn so much self control with a bit of discipline. But at 17 months, it's up to you to decide if he can comprehend that yet. Actually, my third gave up her bed around 19 months, and was able to stay in bed at a warning, so he probably can, if you choose that approach.

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S.F.

answers from Madison on

Stick to his regular routine. If he is used to having the door closed, leave it closed. Also put up a gate for safety. In the future if he is able to open the door he will still be enclosed in his room by the gate so he won't be wandering around in the night.

As long as he is quiet and staying in his room, let him be. Make sure anything he can get into is safe for him.

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R.P.

answers from Cleveland on

id close the door until he is used to being on a big boy bed and potty training and then gate the door since he is used to having his door closed i would let it be if he is quitly playing but if it gets loud id go in and let him know its bed time, the first few weeks he will defently be up and out bed some because its all new to him

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S.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

close the door and see what happens. We were afraid that our son (who moved into a toddler bed several months ago) would be getting out of it all the time, but he doesn't move from the bed intill I open the door. Not even if I call out to him and tell him it ok. but as soon as that door is open he is off the bed and door the hall in a flash.

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