Ex Snooping Through My Finances?

Updated on July 30, 2009
R.G. asks from Atkinson, NH
11 answers

My ex boyfriend recently moved to Texas to work as a mortgage loan officer for a nationwide bank chain. Although we haven't seen each other in 15 years, we have always kept in touch through email and shared photos of our weddings, children, etc over the years. Lately he has been posting on Facebook about his new job and the crazy things he sees when dealing with people's finances. These posts can be viewed by all of his "friends" on facebook as well as myself. I have never told him I use the bank he now works for, but some of situations he writes about sound uncannily familiar. My husband and I have been struggling with finances lately so I am wondering if it is possible that he could be snooping through my account. Does anyone know if every bank employee has access to all customer accounts? If so, is there any way I could find out for sure that he has been viewing mine without my permission? I would think this is illegal and the bank should be notified.

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C.H.

answers from Boston on

Hi, I am a supervisor for a large bank and yes we have access to view everyone's info. Yes it is highly illegal if he is doing this. Absolutely the bank should be notified. Even if his stories aren't about you, they are about someone at his bank and he should not be sharing that information with anyone it is very unprofessional and illegal.

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L.B.

answers from Boston on

He sounds highly unprofessional and what he is doing breeches confidence issues with clients.
Call the 800 # for the bank...not certain what a local branch could do. Do take copies of the FB conversations for proof and then report the SOB.
The bank should be notifed...no telling what else this creep is doing with customer information.

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M.H.

answers from Springfield on

I wouldn't block this creep as a fb friend... quite yet. I'd keep an eye on him and if he's dumb enough to brag.. having him as a fb friend could help aid YOUR investigation of HIM.

Good luck!

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K.A.

answers from Boston on

Hi there!
Sounds like trouble!!! First of all you need to ditch him as a "friend" and second of all switch your bank if possible-he sounds creepy. Is your husband ok with all of this contact? If so you should probably discuss what is going on.

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B.P.

answers from Boston on

Hi Robin,

Of course, it's illegal to look at anyone's account without authorization (written or verbal) for a particular purpose. I'm not sure whether you need to write a letter to the bank president or just go in to see your bank representative. In any case, put down the facts and circumstances on a sheet of paper with your name, address, etc. Also put down your ex's name, etc., soc. sec. number if you know it. He must be using the computer at work, so they could trace what he's doing. In any case, it is against banks' policy to discuss clients' personal information on the Internet. The guy is in super-hot water and will get fired with good reason. He sounds sort of reckless and immature. Good thing you didn't stick with him. If twas I, I'd quit the holiday exchanges.

Please go to the bank today and do the first step of telling them what you think he's doing to you and what you know he's doing to others. Print off the FaceBook page with some of the information and bring it along with the information about your account to the bank.

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S.S.

answers from Boston on

Hi R.,
I don't know what it's like in the US, but here in Australia bank employees can only review details of customers' accounts for valid reasons - and that certainly does not include snooping and then posting this information onto a public website!
The bank should be notified and again, I don't know what the complaint process is like over there, but here customers can lodge a complaint and ask for an investigation to be conducted. Theinvestigators should be able to check the log ons and databases accessed by an employee. If found that access to customers' accounts was not for a valid reason, eg; reviews in conjunction with a loan application, then the staff member may very well be dismissed depending on the severity of privacy breaches and any other breaches which have occurred.

Good luck and I sincerely hope your ex has not been stupid enough to do this to you. Still, he should not get away with it.
S.

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C.T.

answers from Barnstable on

I agree with the posters who say to keep him as a FB friend. Keep him where you can see him for now. But be careful what you post because he can see it.

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C.V.

answers from Boston on

I would switch banks for your privacy ASAP. But also print out some of his Facebook posts about people's finances and bring it to your local branch. Speak to a manager and have them look to see if he's looking into your accounts or others peoples' accounts. The local branch might not be able to do it themselves but they can show it to the higher uppers for investigation. He sounds highly unprofessional--I am sure the bank would want to know about his actions.

You should watch your credit report carefully too. If your ex knows your SS number, he can do a lot of damage to your credit.

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D.F.

answers from Boston on

R.,

Does he have your SS#?? He may know way to much about you. I would change banks. Block him as a FB friend. If you strongly think he has been looking into your accounts, go to the bank and ask, see if they can tell the last log in and by whom. I would not let him get away with creeping like this at all.

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J.L.

answers from Hartford on

R.,

I am going to be direct but please dont take what I am about to say offensively for I just want to be logical here.

Do you have "PROOF" that he is snooping in YOUR financial matters via the company he works for?

If you do not have proof it would be frowned upon for you to address what is, at this point, only your fears, assumptions and suspicions to his company or to him.

If you do address this with his company or with him with out facts and proof that YOUR private financial matters are being violated it could become a very messy situation for you and for him.

Try to keep a level head about this. Right now in this economy many households are going through financial difficulties. Please know that your finacnial stories are very similar to your neighbors.

Now as for his facebook page that is a bit of a different story. Hear me out...

It is obviously unprofessional and ignorant of him to post the client stories he comes across from work on his facebook. It's clear he lacks work ethics however again these are stories that I am assuming he has not placed factual client names to.

You could report him to facebook itself for improper use, you could print and send his facebook postings to his company with a note stating you find his remarks to be unprofessional to the clients he works with and matter should be addressed.

If you do report him to facebook be sure to ask facebook administration if your name will be left out of report.

If you report him to his company for posting privileged client history on facebook be sure to make sure anything you send them do not have your name on it for again it could become very messy if he learns it was you.

FYI: I would not delete him from your facebook page for I would want to be aware of anything that he writes that might provide me with some proof to my suspicions. Be selective in the information you share with him on facebook or directly.

Good Luck

D.B.

answers from Boston on

The only problem with switching banks is that you will incur expenses. You should make copies of everything that indicates what he is up to. I have found, with my bank (Sovereign), that a lot of contact is required at the branch where we opened the account. Even though we do most of our transactions with the branch in our town, the contact person at the original branch has been absolutely the most helpful person around. I disagree about calling the 800 number - you will get someone who doesn't know you and may lose you. If you have a personal connection at your branch (or the one where you opened it), you should put yourself in a chair opposite the manager so that your face is associated with your name and problem! That person can shepherd the investigation up the chain of command and get some action. You can certainly pose the question, "Is my best chance of great security to remove my account at once?" - THAT will get them moving if they aren't already. Be firm and make it clear that you will move your account in a heartbeat. Also check every statement with an eagle eye to be sure that even small amounts of money aren't missing or unaccounted for. The bank can help you do this - it's good to have them checking too.

My son's debit card info was stolen and his account was debited for several transactions for a few hundred dollars each. His local bank (near his college) had a new person working on it and she didn't do what she should have. Our contact at the original branch was fabulous and followed up on everything. You definitely need an advocate who knows you and cares to keep your business.

The fact that you haven't told your acquaintance that you use the bank is not important. He probably has access to a lot more than you can imagine. It sounds like he may be investigating you, and others he knows through Facebook, on his own. He's stupid because he's bragging about it. The bank investigators should be able to track what info he's been getting into. They should also see if he has an account (or several) in his own name - he could be transferring money from friends' accounts, even in small increments, into his own name. One would think that he wouldn't be bragging about it, but then again, creeps and crooks aren't always really bright.

You should, if you stay with the bank, get them to give you a new account, new checks, and a new debit card AT NO COST TO YOU, once you are assured that this guy is no longer employed there or in possession of any records.

Of course, if you are not 100% confident in your bank, you can and should switch. However, you may run into a similar problem at the next bank with an unscrupulous employee, so it may be wiser to have an extremely vigilant staff at your current bank watching out for you.

Good luck!

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