My son will only speak to my husband. He will respond to him with the best he has to offer. when i talk to him he turns away like i said nothing. the only time he will respond to me is when i tell him NO. He will jabber away like he is back talking me. what can i do to get him to talk to me? has anyone had this problem?
I had a similar problem with my daughter. I recommend spending more mommy and child play time together where you interact, laugh and read together. It really helped us.
you didn't say how old your son is...that would determine I think how you would need to respond, or not to the situation. My dh was deployed for 5 months and my dd wouldn't talk to him for a few days after he got home. We didn't push it just let it be on her time. It was hardest for my dh because he was feeling hurt even though he understood that he didn't need to it was more about her feeling insecure than anything. If you stay home with your son it might be he is just comfortable around you and doesn't feel a need yet to communicate beyond his needs. It's really hard to answer your question without knowing how old your son is.
With my dd when she was young we went to a sign class for babies and it really helped us to be able to communicate from the time she was little.
I went away for a few days last week and dd didn't want to talk to me on the phone. Kids go through their own expressions of independence at different stages.
He's not trying to hurt your feelings I am guessing--do you jabber back at him when he jabbers at you after you say no to something? he may be performing for your dh because he doesn't see him as much? just throwing out a few ideas--give him choices on things when you talk to him and you might be surprised at how much he does start talking to you even if it is jabberwalkie
Don't push him! He's learning he has power over you in this way. So if you don't let it bother you, he won't do it anymore. Also, all kids switch back and forth between preferences of caregivers. For a while Mommy is favorite, then Daddy, then grandma, and so on. Right now he might be in a Daddy phase. How old is he anyway? It's pretty normal. When my son was first starting to talk, he would never call his Dad Dada or anything. I know he could say it because he would say it for me. But he would never say it to my husband. And my mom was also very aggressive in trying to get him to look at her. So whenever she held him, he would look away. This bothered my mom to no end, and he knew it. So my advice is just back off a little, and keep talking to your son. Try not to be offended if he won't talk to you or look at you. If you stop trying to make him do it, he will start on his own. Babies figure out real early that they can exert their own power by not doing what mom or dad wants them to. And the more you push, the more they will dig in their heels. This will only get worse before it gets better. :) So just relax, and he will come around.
I would not worry about it, as long as he is talking and making his other milestones. That is not fun. Good luck.
Try role playing with his dolls. we have three black bear dolls and I often play one is mommy, daddy and a baby bear. Now, I here son talking in his room and copying what I had shown him. This is a good way for you to act out emotions and reactions so he can learn what is proper. Like the baby bear back talks the mommy and has to go to time out. then he apologizes and they talk about how sad the mommy felt....etc. Oh, and have little conversations with your self like when he is playing in a near room. Start baking and having a good time talking all the while. He might see you have fun and want to join.
don't worry and make time to play with him more.
S.,
I see two possibilities --
Either your tone of voice or the frequency of your voice.
Questions:
How does your son behave around other women?
What is your tone of voice when talking to your son?
Is there a possibility that your son may have a partial hearing loss?
Some people can only hear a range of sound. So they can hear a low pitched sound, but not a high range. Have you had your son's hearing tested?
Perhaps there is something in the tone of your voice that your son does not appreciate. Shift your way of talking and see if that makes a difference.
With my whole heart,
C. TLC (Transition Life Coach)
Loving Connections LLC
What is Loving Connection?
Caring enough to share your whole heart.
S.,
My second baby does the same thing. She's 15 months old. She talks away to her daddy, but never says anything to me. I don't worry about it. Trying to push or force him will either frustrate him because he isn't ready, or it will turn it into a power struggle that you can't win. Kids do their own thing when they are ready. You can't change their internal clock, so just let it ride. He'll talk to you when he's ready.
Cheers,
S.
I once heard that it's because he trusts you to never stop loving him. It means he puts on a good show for his dad, because he may be trying to "earn" his love, but he knows you love him no matter what.
I wouldn't worry about it yet. My neice didn't talk to her dad at all for the first 14 months. Then, she didn't talk to her mom for another two or three. Now, at three, she talks all the time.
It's normal for children to go through a stage where they pick a favorite parent. Don't worry, it won't last forever, and it doesn't reflect on your amazing parenting skills.
