Fussy 5 Month Old

Baby may just miss you. If you are taking over at bed time then he is probably just tired and ready to sleep. It may help when you leave the baby to leave something that smells like you like a shirt you have worn. The familiar smell of mom may help him to calm down. Also make sure that your boyfriend knows that when the baby is crying the point is not to make the baby stop crying but to comfort him. Sometimes know matter what you try the baby will still fuss especially if they miss mom. Just like we would rather be comforted when we are upset even if it does not magically make us feel better it is better to just hold and love babies. They will not be spoiled if they are held a lot. No one goes to therapy because they felt loved to much as a child. Relax and enjoy the baby phase goes by so quickly and you will miss it when it is gone.

Babies are amazing! They know their Mommy's voice when they come out. Another thing they know is how people feel. If your upset you baby can sense that. So same with the Daddy if the Daddy is uncomfortable or unsure. The baby can feel how he is feeling. Also babies develop a sense of home! My sisters baby knows when she is home. It's going to take time and adjustment. Hang in there and it will get better!!

My daughter is 6 months old so I understand what your going through. First I want to say congratulations! Babies thrive on schedules and they know their surrondings. You say that he is fine if your boyfriend comes to your house. He probably is more comfortable at your house becuase that is where he is most of the time. Brooke, my daughter, has an absolute fit when I leave her with grandma at her house but when grandma watches Brooke at our house shes fine. I think its a combination of missing you and his home. If its possible I would have your boyfriend come to your house to watch him while you go to class. Also, when you all move in together things will be a lot smoother. Good luck!! Your doing a wonderful job!

He probably does not recognize his surroundings. No matter how often he visits there he knows that it is not his cozy home. Therefore, bring something familiar with him such as a teddy bear he may see often at home, a pillow case that will hold your scent, a blanket that he may use at home..etc...etc...This may help him feel and know that he is safe in this other place, even with Daddy. Although a parent may be with a child somewhere other than where they are use to, they definetly already know at that age to recognize the unfamiliar. It happens with my 5 month old daughter at my parents. She does not cry but she is not at all her self when we go there. She is quiet and observant. At home she laughs and coos all day long. Also try to feed a baby before going out always, while sticking as best you can to his schedule. Feed him a full meal/bottle. While they are away from home this helps keep them at ease and content at least in this category. A pacifier and teether may also help sooth and entertain him. A few tips that work for us.

I am guessing that he is just not comfortable with the environment at your boyfriends home...wether it is something as simple as just how the furniture is placed, to the colors. It may have nothing to do with your boyfriend. If the behavior doesn't let up, is it possible to allow your boyfriend to watch him at your house? That way he can still enjoy some father/son time together, without all the crying. That would have to be tiresome to handle each time for your boyfriend...and the baby really. Good luck!
K.

T.:

It may be that the baby is just suffering from separation anxiety, but I had this crying problem with my son. At first I thought he was just a fussy baby. He would cry in super markets, at friends homes, in restaurants... pretty much anywhere that wasn't our quiet little home. It wasn't until he was three that we found out he has Sensory Integration.

It may be what is bothering your baby to tears. He might get held too much over at Daddy's house. It could that it is too noisy (does Dad play loud music?), smelly (cook different foods than you), overly colorful, cluttered, more sunlight than your home, etc... Any or all this could cause a Sensory Integration Kid to have sensory overload, and have what I call a "meltdown"!

You might want to read this:
http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/SPD-symptom-ch...

It is worth considering and ruling out - so I hope my reply helps!

Y.

Hi T., It sounds like there is something at your boyfriends house that scares your son or makes him uncomfortable. It also may be that your son knows you will be leaving if he goes to daddys house. He may just be having a hard time separating from you. Try spending time at daddys house with your son and see how he responds or maybe daddy can watch your son at your house for a while.

who else is there with your boyfriend at his house. it could be them he doesnt like. if you dont ever take him anyhere else to be left alone it could be that he doesnt want you to leave regardless of who you are leaving him with. if he doesnt cry to be left with anyone else that you leave him with that doesnt live at your house then i may be concerned at whats going on at boyfriends house that my baby doesnt like. i watch kids at a daycare and some kids realy just want mommy and will cry for hours if she isnt in the room with them. kids get over this but it could be months from now.

Hi,
Do you stay there with your son at all? He may just associate being there with being without you. If you can spend some time there, the three of you, maybe you can ease the transition. Maybe also let Dad be more hands on when you are together. (this was really hard for me with my first because I was sure he wasn't doing it right, right being "my way")I don't know if this was helpful but good luck and congratulations.

Hi T.,

Congrats on the baby! I have 3 & 1 on the way. My youngest, who is 8 mos now, is just like your son. Each week our family gets together. We alternate homes & when we have dinner at other family member's homes, my daughter cries, sometimes even when she is in my arms. When she's at our house, around the same people, she's fine. Do you think that it's possible for your bf to watch your son at your house while you go to class. That will probably be easiest at first, then you can take him over & keep trying to get him used to your bf's house. Good luck with everything! Children are such blessings & I pray that God keeps you strong through the tough times! God bless!

Hi T.,

Check and see if the school you are going to has parenting classes that both you and the baby's daddy can attend. The pair of you can learn things together about raising a child. The baby has "separation anxiety." I know it is very frustrating to have the baby cry for hours but all you do is hold him, rock him, feed him, change his diaper, burp him and just know that the baby is separated from his mother. In time he will learn to cope with changes in his life.

Good luck. Hope this helps. D.

Hi T., I,ve been married for 11 years and have 3 kids ( 10, 6, and 2). Babies are very sensitive to the people they are around, Is your boyfriend completely comfortable with the baby? Babies feel very uncomfortable if they sense tension, fear or even awkwardness. You may need to let the baby spend more time with your boyfriend so the baby and your boyfriend can be more comfortable with each other.

Hi T.,
When he spends the night, does he take a toy, blanket, playpen, etc with him to Dad's house that he doesn't take when he just goes for a few hours?
Just a thought.
M.

Your baby misses his mommy. It's not more complicated than that. I like the idea about parenting classes. If there's a way for you to keep him with you most of the time, do it. At this early stage in his life, he REALLY needs your comfort, especially at night before bed.