Getting Married and Looking for Ceremony Ideas to Include Our 3 Kids

A friend of mine bought a tree that all of them watered as part of the ceremony. Then they brought it home and planted it in their yard.

You could decorate a wagon and put Kellen in it and have the other two kids pull him down the isle. I went to a wedding where they did that and it was so cute.

Dont feel bad my husband and I had our kids first too. Maybe have your little girl be your mini maid of honor maybe have some little flowers made like yours so she feels like she's a big girl. At our wedding our wedding we had our son hand out programs to guest before ceremony started. Also give each one a small job that makes them feel like they are helping yet no helping to much. Planning a wedding is beyond stressful try not to stress the small stuff. I dont know if my ideas help you out at all. Good luck.

Take some time for yourself and quietly get married with your
close family and friends.

Hi L.,

You should check with Susan at affordableidos.com She has some of the best original ceremony ideas, both traditional and non traditional. My husband and I were married in an outdoor ceremony that we pieced together and created from various resources she provided, as well as from our own inspiration. Susan, herself, was our officiant and it couldn't have been more perfect for us. MANY of our guests commented that it was the most intimate, lovely wedding they had ever attended. Be sure to mention your aversion to the sand ceremony (although, with the age of your children I think it would be perfect (FUN) for including them). There's also a flower ceremony the kids could be part of that you may like. She could send you tons of ideas and you can, if you choose, craft your own ceremony, vows, etc. Check it out at www.affordableidos.com
Good luck and Congrats!

lets see.... JADYN COULD BE THE FLOWER GIRL AND THROW PEDDLES DOWN THE WALK WAY.....MASON COULD WALK YOU DOWN THE WALKWAY, AND GIVE YOU AWAY,AND WHEN THEY ASK FOR THE RING KELLEN COULD COME AND PRESENT IT(LIKE SITTING IN THE FRONTAND COMMING TO MOMMY)SMALL BUT MEMMORABLE!!!! GOOD LUCK AND CONGRATS!!!!B.

My finace and I are getting married in May. We have a 2 year old together and he has a 5 year old (who is the same in my eyes). We bought a unity candle online (it waa a little expensive, 45 I think) but it had our names, the date of the weddng, and the girls name. IT also had a little saying about blending families. We are in the process of writing a little speach type thing for the pastor to read so that when we lite the candle the kids will help. They are both flower girls also.
Not sure if this helps, but congrats on your wedding and good luck : )

We did a couple things to include our kids. I have one son from a previous relationship and my hubby has a son and daughter from previous marriage.
At the time they were (stepdaughter) 8, (my son) 10 & (stepson) 10.
Both boys stood up with my hubby as groomsmen and his daughter was one of my bridesmaids. We also had a unity candle and instead of parents lighting each of our seperate candles, my son lit mine and his two lit his. Lastly, I found a website that had Family Medalions and I ordered one for each of the kids that we presented to them during the ceremony. They come with ideas of how to incorporate them in to the ceremony and for the pastor or minister to read while you are presenting them.
For me it was a really nice way to include them. The site is: www.familymedallion.com
They also have other ideas of how to include your children in the ceremony. Best wishes and congratulations!!!

When I got married the first time Tyler was about 18mo. We had him as our ring bear. When I got married this last time the only adults was myself, my husband, the maid of honor and the best man other wise everyone else was kids. Tyler walked me down the isle, Bryce was the groomsman and Devyn was the ring bear and then we had my neice and his neice as the girls. After we said our vows my husband said vows to the boys and the pastor said verses about uniting us as a family. I know yours isn't with step kids but his kids but it was so nice to have the sermon include the kids and uniting as all as one not just the husband and wife. It was just as an important day to the boys also as it was for the two of us so we wanted them to be included as much as we were. Good luck and Congrats!

My husband had two kids from a previous relationship and we had the girl who was nine at the time be our flower girl. The boy who was 7 was our ring bearer.

You could do the same thing, except have both boys be the co-ring bearers since they are so young.

If the wedding was somewhat casual you wouldn't have to have them in tuxes and a "flower girl" dress, just in a nice outfit and cute dress.

Just an idea....

J.

First of all, Congrats on gettin married! :) I'm so happy you guys decided to make that commitment to each other even after 12 years! :)

Ways to include the kids? Well, I was thinking the 4 year old minght like to be included in the ceremony- such as "Jadyn, do you and your brothers Mason and Kellen accept ____ into your family? Will you promise to love him and treat him with respect?" etc. If she is mature enuf to stand thru stuff.. Of course after re-reading this, i realize that he's already their dad! silly me. well, maybe other's reading this could use that idea or you could try to adapt it to your family. "Jadyn do you and your brothers promise to listen to your mommy and daddy and love them and respect them?"

I liked the wagon idea too, You could have Jadyn pull the boys (with a bridesmaid/maid of honor's supervision) Or if you were okay with not having your dad walk you down the isle, you and fiance could walk on either side of Jaden and pull both boys in the wagon so it would be your Family walking down the isle to united at the ceremony. Or if you're set on you dad for that part, you can all walk out that way starting your 'new' life as a united family.

But of course, as others have said, with such young kids, be prepared for them to be overwelmed by so many people and possibly to not co-operate. Have other family or friends be responsible for each child for that just in case and take them out on a one by one basis if needed. If they are playin a part in the ceremony, remember to keep the whole thing as short as possible and if they are suppose to speak keep your directions/words to them short and sweet. :)

But take my advise with a grain of salt, I've been a professional wedding photographer and seen all kinds of things. When I was married myself we didnt have any young children in our family to be in our ceremony, so i havent had to deal with it on that level, just in viewing and photographing. And on that note- Take photos with your kids before the ceremony!!! I can't tell you how many loose patience even by the time the ceremony is over. I've found that couples love it when they meet and see eachother for the first time that day in a sepereate room before photos just the two of you and maybe a photographer to catch the moment for you then get out so you can have one moment just you two before the big event. But I'm sliding into another topic completely- Sorry!

Good Luck with whatever you decide! :)

One thing that I have seen done, is to light a family candle. Each child helps in lighting the unity candle. I know this might be difficult for the real small ones, but you could do it as you held them, and you, your fiance, and the 4 year old could all light it together.

My brother and sister-in-law had four kids between the two of them before they were married, and they did the family unity candle thing at their ceremony too. It was really beautiful, and a nice way to say we're in this all together. :)
The kids all stood up in the ceremony, too, although the youngest at the time (age 2) mostly walked down the aisle and then just sat with grandma and grandpa. So, that may be hard to do with all of your kids being so young.

my friend called hers a family ceremony instead of a wedding and the dad and mom made family vows to the kids so that they would be a family forever instead of making it so much about just the bride and the groom.

I was at a simple outdoor wedding, where both had children from previous relationships. I thought it was cool for their kids to be included. Her kids were her 'attendants' and his son was his 'groomsmen' (all the kids are boys by the way... four all together). Instead of asking "Do you take...", the pastor asked "Do you take ___, along with __,__,__...to be a family..." He would have the words "Family" in the service as much as possible. Each of the kids had age appropriate "jobs" during the service too. It's a bit hard to explain, as it was a few years ago... but I still remember how neat it was to include the kids and have them part of the ceremony.
Hope that whatever you choose to do works out for you. Congrats on your wedding!
~SR

I have heard of having your kid help you light the unity candle with the parents, I don't know how that would work with three kids tho. Hope you get some good ideas, and remember that they may decide they don't want to do their part at the last moment-and shouldn't be pressured into it. I got my daughter a necklace that was only like $15, cause i don't think she is ready for expensive jewelry either. My daughter ended up getting sick the day before my wedding. She walked down the aisle looking really sad and tired, then took off her dress and fell asleep the rest of the night-so you never know!

Hi L.!
A friend of ours just had a similar wedding, except that they had 2 girls, ages 12 and 1. The 12 year old was a bridesmaid, and the 1 year old was a miniature bride, who was carried by the mother of the bride. Also, they had 3 tiny girls, probably around 3-4 years old spreading flower petals on the isle. The little girls had white flowing dresses, and they had garlands of flowers and ribbons in their hair. Lovely! They looked like little fairies. Maybe Jadyn and Mason could be flower-girl/ring bearer, and Kellen could be the miniature groom? Congrats, by the way on your upcoming wedding. How wonderful! Good luck to all of you.
-M.