Having Problems Conceiving Our 2Nd Child

the more you stress and worry the harder it will be to get pregnant! I tried for two years and when I finally gave up and decided to buy a house instead....PRESTO! I was pregnant with my son! too much stress does something that only relaxing and forgetting about how much you want it can fix!

You probably have heard this a million times, but here it goes, Don't stress!!! the more you think, and worry about it, than the longer it will take.

I went to a chiropracter who put my lower back into place and I was pregnant within 1 1/2 months. It was someone who used the Gonstead meathod of chiropractic.

As hard as it can be, all you can really do is keep trying. If you know when to optimally time intercourse, that's really all you can do at this point. It took my husband and I only 2 tries to conceive our son, who was our first child, so I expected relatively smooth sailing when conceiving our second. In order to time intercourse, I checked my cervical mucus and cervical position, used ovulation predictor kits, and charted my basal body temperatures using Fertility Friend (http://www.fertilityfriend.com - a free service, lots of good info). And yet we didn't hit the jackpot until our 11th try. It was worth the wait, as we now have a beautiful baby girl, but the wait was excrutiating, and there was nothing worse than knowing I was doing everything right and still not succeeding month after month. Hang in there!

God gives us children to teach us about Him. In this case you need to learn to trust Him and His timing. You will conceive when you are supposed to. Trust God to give you the wisdom you need to find the problem (if any), or the patience to wait for the right time (God's).

I feel your pain! We've been trying 9 months to conceive our 2nd. It took us 6 months with our first, so I've tried to be patient, but EVERYONE around me is pregnant! My OBGYN told me the same thing. I am going to start using a Clear Blue Easy ovulation monitor. I'm not exactly sure that what it is called, a friend of mine is loaning it to me. They are pretty expensive, look on ebay! It worked for her the first month and a friend of hers the first month! It is definitely cheaper than fertility treatment! Good luck!

I kind of went through the same thing. I got pregnant in the first month with my first child and with my second it took 6 months. For four months we tried "if it happens, it happens" like we did the first time around, but i couldn't take it anymore so I bought ovulation kits and after two months I got pregnant. I think because when I got pregnant with my first child I had no idea what to expect, I had no pressure on myself. When I really started "Trying" for the second one that's all I could focus on and I think I stressed my body out. I have a friend going through the same thing right now. Good Luck!

I am a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ. If you have not received him in your heart I advise you to do so. He will hear your prayers and will help you.
Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Keep seeking Him and He will answer you, He is faithful even when we are not. He hurts when you hurt and wants to help you in everyway, we just have to render our lives to Him first and be obedient to His word. God Bless you and you are in my prayers!

How long is a few months? I have 4 kids. The first 2 were easy. The third too about 7 months. The last as a true miracle. When we started I just had a feeling that it was going to be difficult. After 6 months I asked my doctor about testing. He said to keep trying and come back in 6 months. I still was not pregnant so I went back. I had some basic tests done and they were fine. DH had a s/a done and it was horrible. We then started going to a RE. He did more testing on me and everything was fine. He did another s/a on dh and it was worse. He is the father of my other 3 kids, so we know at somepoint he was fertile. The doctor put me on clomid to give dh's "good guys" more targets. Still didn't work. The doctor said I would have to do IVF to get pg. We couldn't do that because it was too expensive. After almost 2 years...and giving up. I found out I was pg. If you really feel like there is a problem, be aggressive in getting treatment. If a few months is only 3 or 4 months, don't stress.

Relax! It took us almost 2 years. I really think that it was the stress...and the fact that I have a strange cycle. I went through the fertility tests...they were all fine. DH went through them...all fine there too. Still nothing. I bought the ovulation kits...did it when they said to...still nothing. Then...when I told DH "no more" one month because the birth would be the SAME month as my graduation from my Masters program...we ended up pregnant! I actually got preg at the very END of my period...not by waiting a few days like they say...and like the ovulation kits were showing. I walked across the graduation stage two days before my due date! :)

I don't think you have anything to worry about. It takes time. When my husband and I were trying for our 3rd child, it took 6 months after coming off the pill (which I had been on for 3 years.) I think every woman's body is different in how they recover from taking them. That pregnancy ended with a miscarriage because my body wasn't ready. I was very distraught at the time, but everything happens for a reason. I got pregnant the very next month and it was worth the wait. I can't imagine not having Autumn, she has been the sweetest blessing. If you try for a year and are unsuccessful listen to your Doctor, but still be patient. I have a friend that tried for years, went through the adoption process for her first child and now has two natural born without fertility. She got pregnant when her daughter was about 1. Another friend that tried for ten years with fertility and was still unsuccessful. They adopted a beautiful little girl and then got pregnant with twins 3 years later. Another friend adopted a little girl from China after years on fertility. She got pregnant with triplets when her daughter was 1. My point is that every woman's body is different. I know being patient can be hard, but stress won't help. Have fun having sex and you will surely enjoy the rewards in the end!! No matter what they are!

Just wait and be patient. It's up to God, not you.

Look into increasing your progesterone levels. They may be low, which happens more times than not in women. Progesterone is what helps our body with the conceiving process. You can research this more online. The best way to increase your progesterone levels is by applying a progesterone cream that can be purchased at most health food stores or you can purchase it from an Arbonne representative. I know they have it.

Good luck!

M. O

Unless you are extremely fertile it takes time to get pregnant. Stress has no bearing on getting pregnant unless you are in a constant state of stress. Stressing about getting pregnant is not going to keep you from getting pregnant. I have multiple problems that make it difficult to get pregnant but I have been blessed with 2 children but it has not been on my schedule. I've been trying for almost 6 months for our third but all I can do is my part by having sex when it is most ideal and just wait. Most doctors won't consider you infertile until you've tried for a year. But if you want to get the ball rolling your doctor can test your progesterone level on the 21 day of your cycle to see if it is high enough. There is also Chlomid that helps insure ovulation. But if you are ovulating for sure than those things probably wouldn't help. I hate to say it but some of us are just forced to wait and silently curse those who can get pregnant whenever they want. Good Luck!

Let it take it's course I never taken birth controle pills.I had my children 4yrs apart,I have 4.Just don't thank about it enjoy yourself as well your husband.Before you know it you will be bless once again.I have a friend who thought she never have children her and hubby tried for 7yrs but I told her don't think about it before you know it you will be bless she did now she has two children.I will keep you in my prayers just stay calm and keep it out of your head.God Bless You Both.

We tried for a few months then went in to see why we were not. It was the position that I was laying in after. So get a check up and have them tell you the best position to lay afterwards. After we were in I got pergo in a mth. Good Luck and RELAX!

Hey there, L.. I'm actually in the same situation. I've been trying for my 2nd since last June with no luck. My first one was easy as well and she's actually only 1 1/2. My OB had me come in last August and do some bloodwork which determined I had a thyroid problem. I was referred to an endocrinologist and he put me on meds. He said it was common for women to develop a little bit of trouble with their thyroid after pregnancy. The medication regulated my cycle so that supposedly there shouldn't be any problems. BUT I'm still not pregnant. The nurse at my OB's office recommended I try using the OTC ovulation predictor kits which I'm going to try this next month. I'm impatient too....not sure if I was any help!

sometimes it just takes awhile! BUT there are 2 things that i would swear helped us conceive...#1, wait at least a few days, even a week if your hubby can, before you have sex and #2 prop your butt up on a pillow and lay on your back like that for 20 min. after sex!

I know how you feel. I had the same problem. We had an 'unplanned blessing' with our first so I just automatically thought #2 would be just as easy. After trying for 3 months I went to the doctor and I had been under a lot of stress-trying to have another baby and also other personal stress at the time. I wasn't even having periods because I was so stressed. Well the doctor told me she believed it would be hard for us to do it on our own. With that-I gave up. I was so bummed. Next thing you know I get my period the next week and by the next month I was pregnant.

Relax! Good luck!

Keep trying. Do not think you know your cycle. I have a one year old that can tell you you never know when it may happen. How do I say this without being too graphic??? Let me just say I know exactly when I conceived my 3rd child and it was a time when I had not quite finished my period. Try everyday. Literally, everyday.
My first took a year and a half. Clomid, 2 artificial inseminations, testing. Then finally on New Years Eve after a few bottles of champagne, some shots and some Karaokee we finally got pregnant. I think we just needed to relax and have fun.
If you do do testing have your husband tested first. His testing is painless and easy. Rule that out before you do your more invasive tests.
Also, my doctor wanted me to wait a year as well. I did not want to. He probably thought I was crazy but he let me start the drugs and the testing. I was 33 when we started trying. I did not want to wait. Why wait? I think it should be your decision when you want to start looking into whether or not there is a problem. Why not get tested and make sure there is not a problem before you try for a year. Just ignore people when they tell you not to worry and just relax and it will happen. That is impossible!!!
Good luck and do what you feel you need to do.

Ever heard of the book "Taking Charge of your Fertility"

and just FYI: an OB is NOT a FERTILITY SPECIALIST

RELAX!! I know you are so ready but your body stresses out if you are "trying too hard" so just try to relax and it'll hopefully happen for you. Good Luck!!

Stop worrying!!!! Get yourselves a six pack of high life and enjoy eachother like you did years ago. If you are meant to have baby #2 it will happen. Have fun!

I had to have help conceiving both of our sons. the first, my uterus was tipped backwards, i had endometriosis and pcos. i had surgery with an ob/gyn and some meds and we conceived the first.
with the second, i used acupuncture and traditional chinese herbal medicine as well as some conventional meds from my ob/gyn., diet changes from The Infertility Cure by randine lewis and exercise. before i met the ob that did my surgery, another one had told me to lose 20 pounds and then come back! had i listened to him, we might not have either child.

get a second opinion. bottom line, your family plans are YOUR family plans, not the doctor's. they are there to educate you and provide the care that will help you achieve your health care goals. i strongly suggest taking charge of your fertility, fertility friend, and any other helps you can find.

i don't think it's very helpful to be told not to stress out. obviously, this is important to you and your husband, and you feel strongly about it. there is probably nothing at all wrong with either of you, it can take up to a year. however, if you want to try to make it quicker, that should be your choice.

blessings on you
A.

Quit trying... :)

You didn't mention what kind of birth control, if any, you were on. We got pregnant before getting married with our first so it was extremely disappointing to try 4 years to get #2!

I had been on the depo shot and I blame it for all my problems. We finally got pregnant and then lost it and after that it took 6 more months before we conceived. We didn't want to have a December baby, so we didn't TRY in March... my son was born Dec 12 LOL

It is your body and if you feel like you are ovulating and everything, get some of those fun books to try different wives tales and have fun with it for awhile. Just relax about it. I would say in 6 months, I would really be on my doctors case or even getting a 2nd opinion about it.

Hang in there... it will happen!

Good luck!

I had a fertility dr. tell me try ten days after your last period and every other day for ten days. My daughter is 14 months.

A couple of other people have already mentioned it, but I would REALLY encourage you to get a copy of the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It is an EXCELLENT resource that explains how a woman's cycle works and how to identify your most fertile days. Your most fertile days are NOT always the same from month to month!! They can shift depending on many factors. You need to learn how to read your body and its signs (if you don't know how already). ALSO, this book can help you determine what, if any, problems you may have in conceiving. It will arm you with a wealth of knowledge that I doubt many OB/GYNs have themselves.

I wasn't going to respond...I figured most had already said it...but stop worrying...stop stressing and the only way to conceive is to have sex...so have lots of it...regularly...have fun.

Bottle of wine doesn't hurt...

I know I'm being facitious...and I don't mean to be. I know the wait is difficult...but a year isn't such a long time to let nature take its course before you call in the big guns.

Good luck to you.

I had the same situation! Our first was literally a honeymoon baby. The second took 7 months of "trying." I charted using www.fertilityfriend.com which helped me take control. I also used Preseed - which worked the second month I tried it!

This may be an 'old wives tale' but I heard cough medicine helps- even if you don't have a cough. Apparently, the theory is that is thins out the mucous membrane (all mucuos membranes) which helps to get pregnant. Dose as directions state and good luck.
Also, did you have an IUD after first child? I did and it took me a couple months after it was removed to even get my period, then a couple months after that to get pregnant. We also had no problems the first time, I accidentally missed a pill and Voila! it happened.
I also hear that the more you worry about getting pregnant, the more stress your body is under making it difficult. Don't worry so much, maybe try taking a Yoga class or practice meditation to help your body calm down.
Good luck!

L. --

The drs tell you to try for a year before they do anything more because you are likely under 35 and have no other health issues or concerns; at least that is what they told me -- I will be 35 in October.

I am in the same boat as you as we are trying for our second, and it has been a very different experience as compared to my first pregnancy. I have determined that in the 3 years since I was pregnant that I don't ovulate every month or at the same time. I have been using those Clear Response Ovulating kits, and I was preggers with my first within 2 months after being on the pill for over 10 years. This time around, I didn't get pregnant last month, and this month no ovulation. Not sure what to make of it. But I figure there is a reason, and I try to be patient about it.

My best to you, from one seeking 2nd kiddo mama to another (-:

It took me 2 years to coceive my 2nd child. It was because of stress. When we, women get stressed do not ovulate. It is hard to relax but I was very impacient until I got depressed so I requested prozac and got pregnant the first time we tried after that. Ask your doctor for something to relax you, or drink a glass of wine before trying....
Good luck. If you believe in God: pray a lot.

I am now 4 weeks pregnant with our 2nd and it took us exactly 1 year. My OB had just started talking about testing when I found out that I was pg. I hating hearing everyone say "just relax and it will happen" but sure enough, when I stopped charting and planning, it happened. God Bless

Sweetheart, you're impatient!! Many women, when trying hard to conceive CAN'T because of the stress associated with it. Since you haven't had a history of infertility or miscarriages, there is no need to add unnecessary drugs into your body.

So, for now, know that your body can conceive. Relax and enjoy the process. Do not focus on "not again this month!". Do not try to get the quick fix with fertility drugs, especially since you probably don't need them.

So relax.

And have fun with the act of making babies!!

Vacations work wonders! My hubby and I went to Ireland this summer and came back with our little souvenir. I'm due in May with #2. We had the opposite problem. It took nearly a year to concieve my daughter (our first) and she ended up being a Clomid baby, so I assumed we would have problems the second time around and lo and behold, our vacation did the trick. We were waiting for the trip to start trying and I actually wasn't looking forward to all of the disappointment every month that we had gone through trying to get pregnant with our daughter. I was so happy to have gotten pregnant on our trip. Maybe try to relax or even take a weekend to get a hotel room somewhere just to have some time to yoursleves. At the very least, try to plan a date night around the time you're supposed to ovulate just so you're out having fun and not just focusing on your efforts so to speak.

I wish you much luck. I know how frustrating this time can be.

L. with my first I took "Female Reproductive Factor" it's and herbal pill that you can get from Whole Foods or Central Market. I also have some friends that went to www.babyhopes.com and bought the FertiliTea Tea. Good Luck! We also now trying for our second!

Hi! I know you must be so disappointed that you are not yet pregnant. There is one thing I have learned concerning chilbearing...we don't make the babies, God does! So relax and have fun 'trying' without the expectation THIS HAS TO BE THE MONTH!

I haven't had this problem yet, wanting to get pregnant and can't yet. But I have experienced get pregnant when I was trying to avoid it! Again, I do believe that God is the baby maker, He just uses our 'stuff.' :)

Mom to four girls ages 5,4,2 1/2 and 10 months

STOP TRYING! Because you are trying so hard, it puts you and your body in a lot of stress. Relax, and have fun. My husband and I "tried" for 6 months and then I just gave up. We went on a weekend getaway to San Antonio and partied on the Riverwalk - just the two of us. A month later, my period was late and 2 weeks later, I had a positive pregnancy test!!! We have a beautiful 3 yr old son now.

I am a nurse and I am telling you, just relax and have fun and it will happen. Trying too hard will stress you and your body!

Get a book called "Taking charge of your fertility:.

Keep in mind that God has perfect timing.
I am an anxious person when it comes to things I desire. It seems like everything starts coming together when I start to let go, but that is not always easy to do.
Sometimes health insurance will not pay for fertility treatment until a year or so of 'trying' to get pregnant anyways...your doctor might have to have record of his knowledge of your 'trying' for a year before he can refer you...Of course, this is something you need to check with your insurance about.
Take Care. ~K.

My husband and I tried to conceive our second child for over 3 years and when I finally went to the DR. he ran a bunch of test on me and for some reason my DDP shot had worn off from when I was pregnant with my first child the DR said that could have been a lot of the problems so he gave me another shot and said to wait 3 months untill we tried again because the shot could have seriously caused mental problems for the baby. 3 months to the date I got pregnant. While being pregnant with my second child my shot wore off again, and the same with my 3rd. I am sorry you have to wait a year to find anything out, but if you were on birth control sometimes it takes a year for it to get completly out of your system, if not then I really don't see why he would want to wait being as your frist child is 4.

When my husband and I were trying so hard to get pregnant, our DR had put us on a sex schedual (sp) every other day for a week before my period and afterward lay flat on my back with my feet up against the wall. He also had me taking prenantal (sp) pills. Good luck. I know how you feel. Take care