Help with 11 Year Old Son

I am a 25+ year educator, and mom to an 11 year old girl. This is a common thing I am hearing from lots of parents!! Is he in 6th grade, and is that a different type of structure from the last school year? Kids need to learn to be responsible, and 11 is still on the beginning side of this experience. You say your husband is laid back, and your son may have that personality trait as well. Don't send him off to boot camp yet! LOL Try this
1)A checklist for every night which you pack all backpacks and lunches, lay out clothes and shoes, and verbally review what is on the plan for tomorrow. Is there gym, art, band?
2) Get up 10 minutes earlier each day. Go over the check list and lay everything new(lunch) right on top of the backpack and pick out the proper coat.
3) Get him a planner (he may have one) Write a note to the teacher to ask him/her to initial the planner each day to make sure all homework is listed, and materials included in backpack. You sign the planner every night making sure all materials and homework are returned. You must really follow through on it, for it to work, but you will begin building the skills he will need for junior and senior high. Good luck! PM me if you need any more advice.

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Talk to the school counselor. Also take him to see some military schools. Maybe scaring him will make him behave. But whatever you do, do it now dont wait another minute.

Well Carey, first let me tell you that you are not alone! I too have an 11 year old son that forgets things like gym shoes, homework, etc. I don't think you were cruel at all not to take his lunch to him. Children need to learn responsibility and going hungry for a few hours might help drive that point home.

I have started to try a new system at my home: I get Monopoly money and give him 11 play dollars at the beginning of the week. This represents his weekly allowance provided that he does what he is expected to do. Each day he doesn't, he has to give me back $2. At the end of the week I give him the amount that he's (earned) been able to keep. There is a $2 bonus if he does everything he's suppose to do. We haven't had that happen as of yet but hey, it's a goal!

I also do this for my 7 year old. I'm not sure if all children are money motivated but mine are! Good luck! Hang in there too. Teenage issues are right around the corner. YIKES!!!

Yes, there may be a underlying issue if he never acted like this before and then all of a sudden decided to act out! Usually every school has a social worker and/or consular(sp). The social worker at my boys school have helped us alot. Not for behavior, but for other things. They are there for you and your children. Call your son's school and request a meeting with him/her and exlpain what is going on and see what they say or recommend. You will be suprised what kind of help they can offer. And please don't wait to long! Waiting will only make it worse! And please don't be embarrased about calling the school for help! You are doing the right thing for your son. My oldest has ADHD and he was like this before getting him treated and it was a teacher that helped me..Good Luck