Help with Sleep

Maybe offering a reward, or something special for you guys to do together after nap time. But let him know he has to go to sleep to get it. Do you think he's old enough for this kind of reward system?

Or maybe some soft lullabye music in his room. May kind of distract him enough for him to start listening and doze off?

T.,

I had a friend who had this same problem with her oldest son. he is almost 6 now, but when he was a baby, he was not hip to the idea of sleeping in his room. She told the story of how, one day at nap time, she was downstairs, and Matthew was in his crib, upstairs. Then she heard the THUD - he'd climbed out of his crib. Once he knew how to do it, it was all over. He would leave his room and find Mom or Dad. She had to let him cry it out, but now she had the dilema of what to do with him since he wasn't staying in the crib. Her solution? She put a baby gate at his door. He still threw a fit, but it worked, even if he fell asleep on the floor, at the gate.

Good luck - it will work out!
L.

Well 16 months is too young to go napless and is a very hard age to bed train. YOu can buy a dome tnet topper for cribs and porta cribs- I would suggest that. Once they figure out how to get out it is a HUGE battle until the are old enough to understand obedience to stay in.
No matter how you go about training him to sleep without you will not matter if he is climbing out of the crib for when he wakes up he will climb out and as you mentioned above- not safe for him.
The only other real option youhave is to take apartthe crib and let his mattress just be on the floor- which I have done and after 2 months went back to the crib and a dome tent because this age can not handle it!
They will figure out eventually how to get the door open and then you can't keep them in their room. They also get very overwhelmed by all the toys at their reach when their little bodies need sleep. Anyway- those are my suggestions- good luck!

I'm sorry but I had to kind of laugh a little at your request. My son is 2 and a half and is trying to climb IN the crib. Forget climbing out.
All I can say is to try putting on soft music or cartoons. My son usually falls asleep within 20 minutes.

Hi T., Sounds like your little guy is ready for a big boy bed. We did that for our little boy when he started refusing to sleep in his crib. He has slept in his twin bed since he was about 19 months old.

Work for me...put him in his crib and stand by it till he falls asleep. Every naptime, pull yourself away about 6 inches. Finally you'll be standing outside the door, then you'll just lay him down, kiss him and walk out. Good Luck
ps
my son is 2 and a half and still in his crib, i thought i would have to get a toddler bed before this happened...but he just goes down like a big boy, and this only took about 9 days to finish

My son too never sleeps in his bed and never has since birth. He's three and we've even bought him a Thomas the Train bed but to no prevail. Granted I know that if I tried hard enough and kept putting him back in his bed when he comes to ours at night but after almost 4 yrs of cuddling up to him its hard to sleep without him. Have you tried letting him co-sleep next to your bed? If that's not good for you then you can also try the little gates that connect to the side of a toddler bed and attach them to each sides of the crib to add more height to it. Another thing I also try with my child is having a tv in his room and letting him watch 1 cartoon movie like dora or cars movie to keep his attention while he gets sleepy.Another option is to punish...Sometimes when my almost 4 yr old gets out of bed and lays in the halway till someone discovers him or comes into the living room 10 times within 10 mins to say he's got to go pee or he's got an itch, I pop him on his butt or turn his movie off or threaten no certain toys the next day and it usually gets him to realize that I've had enough and that its time to go to bed. Just try different things....usually something eventually sticks.

Hi T.... when we first brought our son (now 5) home he didn't like his crib either. He actually slept in his pack-n-play for the first three weeks of his life! We gradually introduced him to the crib over those two weeks by putting him down in his crib for naps and bedtime after he had gone to sleep either in our arms or in the pack-n-play. Then, we started putting him down in the crib before he went to sleep; leaving a night light on and us sitting in his room for a short while. We would go in and check on him every 15 minutes or so - pat him on the back and then leave again. We did not pick him up out of the crib during this time because that would have meant we would have to start over again. We would change his diaper in the crib as well so he continued to get more comfortable with it. This was the easy part. It didn't take long before he was fine with it. The hard part was when he was about a year old and he decided he wanted control over his bed time. That's when we had the crying jags - which were very hard to get through. The only thing I can offer up is that you have to be consistent in all that you do - consistent nap and bed times. Consistent in how you deal with bedtime - maybe do bath time, reading time right before bed and get him as calm as possible. Read a book to him or sing to him the first few minutes in the crib. leave a night light on and the door ajar and then leave the room. go back every 15-20 minutes and check on him - don't pick him up 'cause you would have to start over again. he is going to cry and it is going to be difficult but if you pick him up then he is going to know exactly what he has to do in order to get you to do it again and again. it took about a week of a lot of patience, a lot of crying, etc. in order to get our son to lay down in the crib and go to sleep on his own at the time we put him down. Each night was a little better than the last until he finally didn't object at all. Since he can get out of his crib you are probably going to be going in and putting him back in the crib a lot until he gets the message that that isn't allowed. Kids will learn and they learn quickly but the crying and the repetition is hard on them and on the parents. Be consistent and be patient and be strong and it won't take long before he gets the message. Good luck. C.

Hi T.! Once my son started to climb out of the crib, my husband and I knew it was time for him to get into a toddler bed. Surprisingly enough, once we switched it to a toddler bed, he never got out of bed again (and he's 2 1.2 now!). He was about your son's age whne we switched him. My son just got to the point where he didn't want his crib anymore and we didn't want him hurting himself climbing out. Hope this helps a little bit! Good luck!

my 18mo old son does the same thing when we put him down for his nap or bed if we are still up doing something. he throws his leg up and over the bar n climbs out, he only gets better ever time he does it. all we do now is talk to him gently and tell him that we arent goin to do any thing for him if he continues to cry and not listen, and that its nap time or night night time and when he wakes up there will be stuff to eat and games to play. incentive is really the only thing that works for me, but when his father tells him in a gentle but stern voice he listens immediately and lays down til he is knocked out. i dunno if this will help much but good luck to u.

WOW! I honestly don't know any advise I can give you, but that boy needs a Medal!

Hi T., My son started climbing out of his crib early too. I would just say for his safety start training him both for big boy bed and nap in his room. Make it a total new thing. First don't wait until he is falling asleep to put him in there make a new routine by setting a bed time and taking him to his room and having him lay down in his bed and telling him it is nap time now in your new big boy bed this is how we do it. Walk him through the steps, of course people say they don't understand it but they will get it. Be consistent. keeping this routine every day for no less than a week and it will come. Some of my friends have used stickers or a toy that they love playing with as an anchor after nap is over they can have. you may have to return him to his bed several times taking up the hole nap time but keep trying. Good luck! A.

T.,

I had the same problem with my son. But you just have to keep doing what you are doing. It may take some time but eventually your son will sleep in his crib. He is going to have to learn how to fall asleep on his own without you too. I know it will be disruptive for your work, etc. This will take some perseverance on your part and maybe even some tough love. But eventually your goal will be accomplished.

I hope this helps.

Thanks,
L. R.

hiya.. Sounds like you just need to stick to your guns for a
little while...
Your son may be small but he will understand when you explain to him what you are doing.. put in perspective with'
being a " big boy'. A regular schedule will also help along with a couple of regular things to do .. such as .. playtime, lunch.. clean up and naptime.. same with bedtime.. bath and bed maybe a story. Same routine every day and nite and he should catch on in a week or so.. Hope this helps.!P.

I agree with the others that it seems to be time to get a "big boy" bed. We did this with our children, all right around 18 months old. The first one we did a toddler bed, but he rolled around too much, just didn't like it. For all of them, we let the kids pick out their own bedding. Whatever character your son's fav, take him to the store with you and get it together.
Other than the upsizing in beds, I truly believe that you've just got to remain consistent. Baby gate on the room was one thing we did also. I would go in with the kids, lay down and read a book, snuggle a couple of minutes, then leave the room. You've got to stay firm, otherwise your child will fall into the thought process that if I am persistent, then my mommy will give in.... Not a good thing!!

To tell you the truth, I still lay down and read and snuggle at nap time, but always make sure it's in their bed....

My son moved to a twin bed at age 16 months. I use a baby gate in the doorway. I tell him that it is naptime and he needs to stay in his bed. If he gets out, I will shut the door. Maybe try doing a routine like have a cup of milk, read a bood, choose a toy to have in the crib with him, then say "Night Night". If he gets out of the bed, you will close the door half-way, if he does it again, you close it all the way. Something like closing the door is punishment for my son, so it sounds like you can use that too. I eventually around age 1.5 had to make it "quiet time" not nap time so he could play in there if he wanted, but had to stay in there quietly for at least 45 minutes. That was usually enough time for him to fall asleep, but after age 2 he quit the napping altogether and that was just a break for me more than anything.
Good luck!

T.,

Maybe he would do better in a toddler bed. We moved our now 19 month old into a toddler bed when she was about 17 months and now she loves going to bed. After reading I put her down and she runs over and crawls into bed on her own. We do have a baby gate on her door in case she decides that bedtime is not a good idea, but so far she hasn't even tried. She has slept in her own room since she was two weeks old. When we were transitioning from crib to bed her pediatrician did say to expect a few nights of crying and sleeping next to the gate in the doorway so I think your son will adjust after a few very difficult days. Hope it helps and good luck!

As much as you probably don't want to hear this it is probably a really good time to think about a toddler bed. We went through a similar situation except my son didn't want anything to do with his crib. It took us about a month to fall asleep in his own bed but it is wonderful now. Every night at 9:00 I lay him down cover him kiss him and tell him goodnight and he is out like a light. Sometimes he lays in there for a couple of hours and talks and sings but eventually he falls asleep. Don't get me wrong it was a struggle at first but it was well worth. As for naps he is just now taking naps in his bad but for the most part he naps on the couch.

Good Luck

B.

Hi T.!

You can buy a 'crib tent' to put over his crib to keep him from escaping. Or you might need to transition him to a toddler bed. I would be worried that he is going to hurt himself climbing in and out (and obviously what it is doing to his sleep patterns). I've seen really cute (and cheap) toddler beds in places like Target and Babies R Us. Maybe if the 'fun' of escaping is gone, he'll stay in bed.

Other than that, all you can do is be consistent. Leave him in his room at naptime for at least an hour...even if he cries the entire time. If he still takes a morning and afternoon nap, maybe try moving the morning nap later until he is just taking 1 nap a day. I've been trhough all the sleep training stuff with both of my children so I know how tough it can be.

good luck!

C., Mommy to:
Allison Skye 3yo
Ryan Chase 18 months

Don't give up....maybe you should try waiting until he is completely a sleep then go and place him in his bed, that way when he wakes its he will realize that its not such a "scary" place if this doesn't work then maybe you could try the big boy bed or a toddler bed with his favorite theme on the blanket, they may need him to sleep with them......let me know how this turns out.

J.

Hi T.!
He may be ready for a toddler bed, but before going there let me suggest something else. You said that he is fine until you put him down. Why don't you let him lay on your shirt your wearing or one you have worn that smells like you. We don't smell ourselves like our little ones do. He might be waking up cause your smell is not there, and he doesn't feel you. Believe me I had to go to bed many a night without my pjs, just to get one of my 4 to sleep when he was little, but it worked. Try it, it doesn't cost a thing, and it might just be that security he is looking for. Good luck!!
J.

i think its time for a toddler bed!!

I don't know how you feel about spanking but I am for it if your child is not listening especially about something that can hurt them. He needs to know that you are serious and you are not backing down, because he will not give up.
Just my opinion. M.