Help with Sleeping Through the Night

Y.,
My daughter is 8 1/2 months old and she goes through phases of sleeping through the night. She will go a week and sleep from 9:00pm to 6:00am. Then whe will have her week of waking at 2:00am for a feeding. I have been told my a few people to give her water when she wakes up during th night so that she learns not to expect formula, but I figure if I am up with her I might as well give her formula. If you think it might be due to teething I highly suggest Hylands Teething Tablets (the melt in her mouth instantly). When my daughter is cutting teeth they work great. She wakes up crying, I give her the tablets and she is back to sleep within 10 minutes. They are homeopathic, so the baby is not being filled with meds. Hope this helps!!!

Hi Y. - We had the same thing. Our baby slept great - then at 5 months it was hell. Waking up three or four times a night. I thought I had died and gone to hell. After three months of losing my mind, I got the books - Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and The Happiest Baby on the Block. Saved my life. I shouldve gotten them sooner. The problem is that around 4 to 5 months their brains change and they start to become aware of sound and things around them, so they dont sleep as well. Get those two books and they will sleep through the night. The first mistake you are making is the same mistake I made, putting the baby to bed too late. At 8.30pm it is WAY too late for them. He needs to be in bed by 6.30pm or 7pm latest. I made this one change and in a week he was sleeping 11 hours - only waking up one time for a feeding! It was amazing. Dont let him cry himself to sleep. It doesnt work. Dont listen to anyone who tells you that. It DOES NOT WORK. Also, you need to swaddle and shhhh. I also have an air filter in his room that cuts outside noise and is soothing. This is recommended in the book. Also, from 4 months to 7 or 8 months, do not let them go more than 3 hours without a nap. Keep putting him down during the day. This is SOOO important, or else they are sleep deprived and are overtired during the night and wont sleep. Read the books. They are life savers. Here is my schedule that I started at 6 months to help you. It has changed as he has gotten older (he is 9 mos) - everything is within an hour time frame. Obviously you are not feeding solids yet, but you will at 6 months. this will also help sleeping through the night. If the baby wakes more than once during the night, he is not hungry and you need to just rock him back to sleep. All naps during the day should be at least an hour. If it is less than that, they are not sleeping enough.

Baby wakes - btw 6am and 7am, feed bottle or breast as soon as they wake up
Breakfast - depending on wake up time btw 7.30am and 8.30am, Playtime - right before nap
Morning Nap - Feed bottle or breast - btw 8.30am and 10am
Playtime - Usually I would walk outside, this is very good for brain development and getting them tired
Noon Nap - btw 12pm and 1pm
Lunch - 1pm (bottle and food depending on age)
Playtime - If I didnt walk outside in the morning I try to do it now. I also use tapes and read to him
Afternoon Nap - Depending on age btween 2pm and 4pm
Dinner - btw 5pm and 6pm
Bath - 6pm to 6.30pm
Bedtime - Bottle or breast and in bed by 7pm latest

As he gets older, the baby will get rid of the noon nap and the afternoon nap will get a little earlier like 1.30 or 2pm. But it is very important to watch for signs of sleepiness before they get to tired. Some children need four naps a day - others three. Some children get rid of their morning nap at 9 mos. the others the afternoon. All children are different. You just need to read the books and watch the signs so your child doesnt get overtired!! Hope this helps!

It seems to me that trying to avoid the middle of the night feed at this age is a little unrealistic. She's still a little baby and needs the food and comfort of regular feedings. And a change in sleep habits is typical of babies too. I think you "lucked out" with having a baby who actually sleeps more than 3 hours at a time, especially overnight. Also, it's been well documented that putting a baby to sleep with a bottle is not the best idea. It puts them at higher risk for multiple ear infections and (when they start teething) bad teeth (milk tooth, they call it). I know it's really difficult to have to pick her up at 3 or 4am and feed and soothe her back to sleep, but hopefully that won't last too long. Comfort yourself by telling yourself that she'll change her habits, sooner or later! Another thing you might try is putting her to sleep a little later. My 4 month old goes to sleep around 10 and sleeps til around 4-5am. That's bearable for me. My other two only slept in 3 to 4 hours at a time until they were well over 10 months old! In fact, my 3 year old daughter only started sleeping through the night about 6 months ago! Oh the joy!!!
Good luck!

Hi. On the go so will add my one cent. Sorry about night waking. It is hard but will stop.... until a tooth comes in or your child gets a cold later in life. SO good practice for now. Don't hiss at me because here comes my question/suggestion.... Is you child on target in the weight department? I have heard that after 12 lbs they sleep though the night. I have twins so it was a bit different as they have been smaller. If she is getting enough food during the day you are OK and night waking my be due to something else. BUT you are still on the cusp in terms of sleeping through the night. You might save yourself a lot of time, as she may be in a growth spurt, by feeding her when she wakes up in a "stealth manner' - no talking, no cuddling, just feeding, and back to bed - so if this is hunger she will respond by eating and back to bed and if not hunger you will not be encouraging playtime. Hang in there as I went back to work at 3 months and mine slept through the night then stopped and then started again. Teething did start around now and went on for a bit before a tooth showed up. AND Hunger is hunger. Keep a log if you can to see any type of pattern on timing and number of days this happens.... After 3-5 days you can pretty much change a pattern with a newborn. I think! :) All the best,
L.
mom to twin girls a year old, nyc

Hi Y.,
I feel your pain! I went through the same with my son except he was never a night sleeper when he was a baby (he is now 2 1/2). I have read that babies go through a fase and as their body develop and change, so do their sleeping habits. This is a fase and it will pass. In the mean time, here are some suggestions:
- Feed your daughter when it's time for her to fall sleep, and when she wakes up in the middle of the night. Make sure to aways burp her. I know some people go against mid-night feedings but if that is what it takes, than do it. I did it with my son until he started sleeping through the night.
- Have a faint blue light (it calms babies) in the room and turn it on when you are feeding her, when you want to check on her in the middle of the night and when you have to feed her in the middle of the night.
- Limit the amount of sounds you make and try not to talk much. A simple shhhhhhh sound over and over was all I did when my son would wake up crying, and it would calm him down right away.
- Sometimes babies when to feel protected and just by having them close to you is all they need. I had bought one of those "snug beds" that you can put in the bed with you. It was really a little pad with hard foam around it, to prevent from parents rolling over their babies when they would sleep with them. The bed I had even had a faint light attached to it. You can find the bed http://www.securebaby.com/crib_positioning_pads_all.html
I hope this helps!
Best wishes!
J.

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my sister is a pediatrician and she told me that you can begin to let them cry it out at 4 months, but that prior to that, their brains cannot process it. I began to sleep train my daughter at around 4 and a half months. Two pieces of advice that were given to me that were helpful were don't go in and put the pacifier back in -- I did not take that advice and at around 5 months, my daughter began to realize that I was attached to that hand that was putting the binkie back in and she began to wake 5-6 times a night! I was exhausted and finally one night I turned that monitor off and just slept. I don't know if she cried or not but she woke just fine and that was when I established my "10 minute rule". When I heard her cry at night, I would not go in until 10 min had passed. Usually she was back asleep before then but if not, then I would go in, but stay for only one minute or so.
The other thing that a friend said to me, which was true also, was that sleep is erratic until about the age of one, which proved to be true with my daughter. Just when you think you have a pattern going, the baby will blow it out of the water! So be patient!! And good luck!
Also, I fed my daughter during the night until about 6 months old or so. I breastfed her and thought she needed it still.

Have you tried playing soothing music in her room. Both my kids love to fall asleep to music. If my 3 1/2 yr old wakes during the night all we need to do is hit the cd player. Now my 7 mo old is the same way. They find it comforting and it helps them drift off to sleep on their own. I play it while I put my daughter to bed at night. While she gets her bottle, we listen with the lights out. So if she wakes during the night I can turn on her music and it helps her go back on her own.

Rather then teething at this age it's probably a growth spurt. Some babies do teeth at 4 months, although it's not the average age. She might need that extra bottle. Make sure she has a dry diaper, and don't turn on lights any brighter then a night light. I keep a pink nightlight in my little ones room that stays on all the time. I think you can get them in other shades too. The light is less harsh then the white or unpainted bulbs. Check to make sure she isn't too hot or too cold also. My 16 month old hasn't learned how to cover himself up yet, and he wakes up cold during the night. But if you think she's hungry it's ok to give her a bottle. You might even consider starting her on baby food around dinner time. If she's ready to eat that it might help fill her up for that growth spurt.

By the way, I don't agree with letting babies cry it out at any age. It's hard when they won't sleep, but in my opinion babies cry because they have a need. Whether it's a cuddle, food, or warmth. I hope you can manage to get her sleeping again without ever having to "let her cry". Good luck! I do know how priceless sleeping through the night is!

I think she's hungry. They go through growth spurts where they need the extra nutrition. If she goes back to sleep after the feed, I'd just give it to her.

Hi Y.... you poor tired Mommy!
FEED HER. When newborns have breast milk, thy typically feed around every 2-3 hours. When you mix with formula, it is still a lesser version of a feed than straight formula yet more than just breast milk. I believe that your baby might well be hungry; hence the binky need. Try feeding her a bit more formula and give her breast milk in the middle of the night if she wakens. I truly doubt that this will be an issue.
YOU ARE NOT OVERFEEDING YOUR CHILD BY GIVING HER A MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT FEED. She is hungry and that is a need that must be met, if possible. Sopunds like there is no shortage of formula or breast milk so why not keep your babe as happy and content as can be?
Best of luck to you.
peace