How to Begin Toddler Boy and Baby Girl Sharing a Room

My two kids share a room and have since my son was 3 months old (they are 21 months apart). My only solution has been to put my son to bed first in the crib so that he can get to sleep before his sister comes in. My daughter is like your son, she will not always fall asleep right at bed time. My solution has been that she can quietly look at books or quietly play with her dolls, but she MUST stay in her bed. I really haven't had too many problems with her messing with her brother (maybe 1 or 2 times). As for them waking each other up, it will probably happen for a couple of weeks, but they will eventually get used to each others "sounds" and sleep through each others cries in the night. My daughter also wakes up crying out often through the night and my son sleeps right through it, and when my son was still nursing at night my daughter slept through his cries. I think it also helps that I put some soft bedtime music on for the kids when they go to bed, it eventually becomes background noise that they hear in their sleep and I think it kind of masks the noise they each make. I will tell you that the first few weeks is going to be very rough (and possibly longer depending on your children) but it will get better eventually.

Also, I would get them sharing a room as soon as possible because the sooner they start sharing the sooner you can get the "bad" nights over with :). Especially if you plan on starting your son in pre school any time soon.

hello,

my daugther (2years & 8 months) and son (4years & 4 months) have been sharing the same room since they transitioned out of my bed(since nov 2008)!!

it was pretty hard when my son constantly wanted the lights on and my daughter wanted the lights off. my son would also constantly call out "mommy or daddy" all night long..sometimes for several hours waking up my daughter.

finally my husband and i gave into my daughter and turned the lights off and forced my son to sleep without lights. he has been without the lights for a month now and he is fine. he actually falls asleep much faster now and he doesn't call out our names anymore.

they go to bed the same time. i tried putting one down first and then the second one later, but that only caused everyone to wake up.

so...i say..do everything together. try to get them on the same schedule and you will notice their own routines. you will also see how one influences the other and it will get much easier!!!

my son has influenced my daughter into potty training. she wants to do everything he does, so everytime he pottys, she does the same. when he he draws or writes his letters, she wants her own crayon and paper. they take turns washing up every morning and night. she learned to how to put on her clothes and shoes by watching my son.

on the other hand, my daughter is not afraid of the dark, so she helped my son get over his fear of the dark. she wanted to sleep in her toddler bed by herself, so my son finally felt comfortable sleeping in his bed without me or my husband because my daughter was in the room with him(we had to sleep with him until he fell asleep, then leave his room

my kids are very close, i think that sharing a room brought them closer together. although they have their moments with arguments and fights, they are best friends!!! they would get each other in trouble one minute and give each other hugs and kisses the next.

i hope this helps. good luck!!!

Hi C.,
I agree that you should be putting both down to bed at night MUCH earlier. Try reading Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth for age appropriate sleep needs and schedules. He talks alot about biological sleep rhythms and how important it is to sync sleep times with them. My daughter is 3 1/2 as it ASLEEP by 6:20-6:45pm every night, wakes up at 6:30-7am, and rarely wakes up. Dr. Weissbluth states that the main reason for night waking is too late a bedtime. As you have said that your son wakes up from bad dreams sometimes and your daughter is a light sleeper who cries and fusses sometimes, I think they are both going to bed way too late. At eight months old, Paige was napping at 9am and 1 pm for at least an hour, bedtime at about 6pm and wake up around 6:30-7am. I would try getting both on a more age appropriate sleep schedule to help eliminate night waking before moving your daughter into the room with your son. Also try a white noise machine, I found one at Target, to muffle noises. It really helps.
Sincerely,
L.

Hi C.,

I think you will be fine with putting them together. You might just have to change a few things :o)

First of all, you might want to begin putting your son down a little but earlier than 8:30ish. Even if it's like 8, and he's allowed to read books for a little bit. By 9 he should be totally asleep.

I used to put my kids to bed at 8:30-9 before they started school, and all seemed fine. But when I was training my son to get up for school, he couldn't do it. I needed to move his bedtime to 7:30pm, so he could wake up on his own at 7am. Today he is 12, and still has the same schedule, and his body is like "clockwork".

Your kids will be fine, I really believe. They will "adjust" the first few nights, maybe by waking the other up accidently. But after they get used to eachother at night, they should be fine and just sleep through eachother's bad nights.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. And it's better to do this than keep your daughter in your room for alonger period of time :O) She might get too dependent on that.

I hope something I've said can reassure you :o)

~N.

Dear C.,
All the ladies have had great advice, so I just want to encourage you. I have a 3yo and 18month old who sleep on the loft outside our room. They have been together for 8 months now. They really don't wake eachother up. Whenever one wakes up fussing the other sleeps right through it. Then I have an 8yo, 6yo and 5yo sharing a room. We do have some trouble at bed time with them settling down, but once they are out, they sleep whatever the others might do. We have the afraid of the dark issue with 2 of them and do keep a night light on. Good luck to you.
stac