Hi,
I am the nanny for a 13 month old little boy. I have been with him since we was 2 months old. We have had problems getting him down for naps as he just wants to stand up and talk in his crib. He naps sometimes in the afternoon, some days not at all. His mom still wants him napping twice a day.
Last week mom and dad were out of town and I had him overnight. The last 4 days I was there I had him napping twice a day at a regular schedule.
I think the difference is that when he woke up at 7am I had him crawling around all over until nap time at 9:30 so he was tired enough to nap.
What I think the problem is is that from when he gets up until I get there at 8:30 they put him in the play pin and he just sits there. He isn't getting any exercise to wear himself out so when I go to put him down at 9:30 he is wide awake.
How do I mention something to his mom and dad without sounding like a know it all or like I"m trying to step on their feet or say they aren't parenting right? They are wonderful I just think that he needs to be able to crawl around in the morning.
Thanks for your help!
Thanks for your help! I think the solution is we get him down for one nap after lunch time and see if that works well for him!
What i would say is that you are having trouble with naps it doesn't seem as if he's getting warn out in time for nap and my suggestion is letting him loose to play or giving him more toys to keep him stimulated between waking up and nap time. Don't sound accusing just tell them the facts. Tell them pretty much what you have told us. good luck with that.
I like what the other mom said about just telling them that you were trying to help them out with the nap thing while they were gone. Tell them what you did that worked. It is hard being a care giver and knowing that something will work but not being able to say anything to the parent about it.
I agree with Ladybug. Somewhere between 12-15 months the children I have cared for drop their morning nap. Then the afternoon nap becomes the primary nap of between 1-3 hours. But each child is different and it does depend on the activity level. A great site I use for sleep issues is sleeplady.com.
I just wanted to say that it sounds like you are a great nanny! My nanny is happy to just turn on the TV and let my son veg out in front of it when I am not home, and she always complains when I ask her to take him outside for a little while when it is warm out.
I don't have any good advice to you that the other moms haven't already suggested, but just wanted to say that it sounds like you are doing a really good job! :)
I think it is fascinating that mom and dad, who aren't around during the day, want this now year old child to take a morning nap. (My youngest gave up both naps by the age of 8 months.)
I think I'd tell the parents that this child is old enough to give up the morning nap and just keep the afternoon nap especially if he is not getting any exercise to make him tired...
Hey K.,
I would tell the parents that you were tying to figure out a solution so you tried something you had read.. Then tell them that you read that in order to make the 2 hour interval successful, the child must be tired, so you did LOTS of activity from 7-9:30 and it worked like a charm. This way you dont sound like a know it all, but DO look like the HERO who figured it out for them. Perhaps you should show them some of the activities you do with him and tell them what he loves:)
Good Luck!
D
Are they putting him in his playpen in the morning while they get ready for work? I would assume that is the case as it is somewhere safe they can put him and he can entertain himself.
I think you should suggest to them a play yard type thing that they can set up in the house. I am not sure if the correct term is play yard - I am talking about those fence things that you can set up in the living room to give the child a larger space to crawl around and play. This would keep him safe while Mom and Dad get ready and give him plenty of room to move around.
Instead of suggesting it as a method to make sure he gets enough exercise (which if someone said that to me about my daughter it would make me feel like they thought I was not taking good care of my child) I would just say something like - You know Baby Boy is getting so big and loves to crawl around, I bet he would love a play yard space. He is getting so big he will outgrow his playpen soon!
Good luck!
Just tell them something like:
"While you were out of town, a thought struck me. I know you've been concerned about his naps and I wanted to try to do something about it for you, so (this) is what I tried. He actually responded really well. I guess some kids just need a lot of exercise to wear themselves out for naps. Maybe if he's being more active in the mornings on a regular basis he'll take his naps a little better. He's your son of course, so what do you think? Maybe it's worth a shot?"
That being said, I'm not sure why they are insisting that a 13mo still take two naps per day. That just seems a little excessive to me, but then I have no idea how long he sleeps for at night. With babies, it's less about how many naps and more about how many total hours of sleep per 24 hour period. Both of my sons were down to one long nap per day by the age of 9 months.
if they are such wonderful people you should be able to say what you feel is happing to their son, they probably want to know, so I would tell them. However if they are really that sensative bring it up as a story (make it up if you have to), for example, tell them you have been having a hard time putting him down for a nap and you remember anouther couple you babysat for had that same problem and what worked for them was to have him wake up just a bit earlier and exercise and run around.... if you tell it like that they will think about it and it will be in their ballpark to say, hmmm you might be onto somthing. Ask them if there is anything you can do to help, really talk with them and work it out together as a team after all that is what a nanny and mother and father should be is a team, not leading seperate lives, let them know you care about their son too that he has had an impact on your life as well and that you love him also and want whats best for him too. Parents want you to be on their side so be their for them, just don't wait too long because it seems you already have, I would have told them right away. Let them know you are concerned, they will respect you for that and it will show them that you are really taking an intrest in their son's well being.
Just let them know that first off they cant control his naps forever and its perfectly normal for a 1yr old to only take ONE nap, and its OK!
Secondly let them know what unless he has some physical activity between wake up time and nap time that he isnt going to get a morning nap. But that you will try your best to make sure he is active and that he gets a p.m. nap.
Of course let them know how you did mornings while they were gone and it really worked well as far as him being active and getting that a.m. nap.
Hopefully they will be receptive and go w/ it.
