How to Make It Thru the Day SAHM

It does get a lot easier, but in the meantime -- give me a break. Most moms would be so happy to at least be home with their kids. Just manage them -- outings, walks, activities, crafts. If I was LUCKY enough to be home with my kids, I would not be complaining. Sorry!!! Don't worry about the house --- do it at night when they are asleep -- that is when I do it, and I work a full time job too, so I can put food on the table. I have 5 kids, yet somehow manage. You can too. I know you can :)

yep, sounds like my house except my boys are 2 1/2 and 8 month old TWINS.....i try to get stuff done either early when we wake up because the twins are in the groove where as long as they have a clean diaper they are good until close to 10am, they usually wake me up between 7 and 8:30..and my toddler is good if he has a dry diaper, some milk and dry cereal to snack on..so that is usually when I can work in the kitchen. or at night after they go to bed, if i have the energy, i can get stuff done. i'm lucky though because my MIL and FIL take my toddler overnight once a week which means hubby drops him off on the way to work at 3pm so it makes it easier...but on those days it is hard to be motivated to do work because i just want to relax.....i try to just space things through the week, but sometimes there are a few days in a row where all that gets done is taking care of the kids and the dishes.

My kids are 4 and 5 and they do a lot. Not because I require it, but because I make a game out of it. I air dry all my clothes, so when there is laundry to fold there is tons of it. Well, I pile it all on the bed and ask them to separate into separate piles. They have a ton of fun throwing it in piles on the floor. Then I come in and sit and fold (which they in turn want to do too). Then they make a racing game of putting it away. So, they put it away and come back trying to get the next thing before it's folded. Other friends have come over and have wanted to make the bed.clean the room, so they have been on that kick for a year now. My daughter has scrubbed the floor. I have been cleaning grout with a bucket or whatever with a bucket and she asks to help so I give her a scrub brush. She LOVES it. Then I give her a cleaning towel to dry the floor. They have a handheld vacuum to clean up their crumbs and they fight over who gets to use it. Oh, and spraying down the counter/table, that is a HUGE fight over who gets to do it.

I don't force them to do anything and make a game out of all of it. Cooking is messier with the kids, but they love it and then they clean up their own mess. So, if you can, try and see if they would like to help you. Scrubbing tubs/floors my kids love. Maybe it's the brush I got them, who knows. It's crazy but it's working for me!!

You are in the heart of the battle! It does get easier. I would encourage you to start training your daughters to help you. At their ages, they should be eager to do so. There is so much that they can do: dusting, sweeping (with an appropriate sized broom), putting some of the dishes away (silverware, tupperware, low items), helping to sort socks, fold towels, etc. You need to start working yourself out of a job so to speak. The oldest at least can start helping with meal prep or entertaining the youngers while you are doing it (nearby). She can make her bed, and her sister's, pick up her toys, wipe down the tables, countertops, sinks (with a step stool). As they get older, your job just naturally becomes easier, as long as you are discipling them well now. (Yes, discipling, but also disciplining.) Enjoy these days. They really, truly are fleeting. I promise!

Oh sweetie...it gets easier. I can feel your lonliness and exhaustion through my screen. Do you have friends with kids your kids' ages to get together with and chat or trade playdates with? I have leaned on friends for support over the years.

Mine are 11,8 and 5. It is sooooo much easier now. But it took teaching them early on to help around the house. Sooo, really the hardest part when they are all home is the occasional bickering. Life gets easier being a SAHM when you are not responsible for every aspect of the home and childrearing. Someday they will all be at the age where they can potty, get bathed and showered and dressed all on their own, grab a snack and drink on their own and call and make their own playdate. My kids even make breakfast together. Soooo, start early to teach them independence.(even when it is easier for you do it yourself..in the long run it pays off)

Get out each day for a walk and some fresh air. Don't do so much housework every day...focus on only necessities. Ask your hubby to help you after the kids have gone to bed. My husband did 2 loads of laundry from start to finish last night..I didn't even have to ask.(but I married a very helpful,considerate and hardworking man who doesn't watch much tv or play video games to unwind. not sure your situation)

Try working on the nap and bedtime schedule for the baby. I remember mine sleeping more and going to bed much earlier. I had a great book I read that gave me skills and understanding to teach my babies to sleep sooo good by 8 weeks...and two long naps...then down to one loooong afternoon nap. If interested PM me and I can give you the name. The older 2 can have an hour of quiet time when baby is taking afternoon nap..and you can use that time to recharge your sanity battery. Oh..and the 3 yr old can still go to bed on time at your set bedtime but lay there if she is not really "sleepy". She can read books quietly for abit but not be in your hair til 9 or 10...that is way late.

Ok...I don't know if you wanted all that. Moms just like to dive in and help. I have never had a housecleaner or family nearby to help. So I learned to survive on my own but also enlist friends to help.

Breathe and rest assured that it does get easier as they get older, and when they get in school. But...then you start dealing with a host of other issues.

Best wishes...

I treat parenting as a full time job. My kids are required to help with housework but it is impossible to keep up with it all during the day with three under 7 years old. This will be my first year with one in school full time once school starts so I imagine I will be able to get a little more done. But...my job is playing, teaching and feeding my children in a nut shell. NOT vacuuming, cleaning, cooking. Obviously I feed my children while home and I do my best to get dinner on the table but children this age alone are a lot of work. When a working mom goes off to work she doesn't get to throw in a load of laundry, or clean the toilets at home just because we dont leave the house it doesn't mean we should have too. Don't get me wrong my kids are in charge of getting laundry to the laundry room. Putting dishes away etc. They do their houshold chores But we are NOT super women. Most of my "chores" happen when the kids are in bed just like a working mom

Do you have a schedule that you follow? Even a basic schedule can really help with getting your children accustomed to doing things at certain times. Children (even your 6 month old) thrive when they know what is coming next.

One thing that I would incorporate into your day would be nap/quiet time. Hands down, no options, EVERY child lays down in their respective rooms after lunch. We eat lunch, clean up, go potty, and everyone lays down for 1-2 hours (I have an almost 4 yr old and a 14 month old). Sometimes my 4 yr old sleeps. Sometimes he plays quietly in his room (so quietly that he thinks that I think that he's sleeping). ;) My 14 month old will play in her crib and sing/jabber to herself. Then she'll fall asleep. Then she'll wake up and jabber a little more and fall back asleep. For her, from 1:00 to 3:00, as long as she's happy in her crib, I let her be (often times she'll sleep until 4:00). Of course I peek in at her to make sure she's okay, but she will sleep for probably 90% of that time.

Nap/Quiet time is the time during the day that I am able to get things done. I try my hardest to keep rooms tidy throughout the day (and I teach my children that everything has a place....that way they know to put an item back where it belongs). Some days I'll be tired and lay down to rest. Some days I'll surf the web. Some days I'll pick ONE room to do more of a deep cleaning.

One more thing... If your 3 yr old is cranky, then she probably needs MORE sleep. Put her down for her nap every day (or at least quiet time every day). Then make her bed time EARLIER..as in no later than 8:30. Your 3 yr old needs between 12 and 14 hours of sleep every day. If she gets to the cranky stage, then she's overtired and will be too worked up to settle down right away. So, Nap at 1:00 (for example); let HER wake up (IMO never wake a sleeping child), then start the bedtime routine of bath, book, potty, drink of water, prayers, bed around 8ish.

Your children will get used to the schedule after a few days and they'll know what to expect. My 4 year old knows that nap time is right after lunch.

Good luck! :)

It does feel like a juggling act some days! Your daughters are old enough to help you with some household tasks. Making beds, picking up their toys, dusting, perhaps folding some laundry or at the very least sorting and putting away. Try to set a schedule for yourself that you can stick to during the day. When I get up in the morning I make beds, do a load of laundry and load dishes while kids are having breakfast. I let them watch some tv while I shower and get ready. Then find things in your area to do- a moms group, a MOPS (Mothers of preschoolers) group at a local church, activities at the library run year round and are usually free or very inexpensive, find a park or a kids' gym to run off some of that energy. Cooking activities could be fun for them and help encourage healthier eating too depending what your focus is on snacks being made. There are a lot of books out there with fun recipes in them. My 3.5 year old rarely takes naps anymore, but my 2 year old still does and needs it. When my daughter was a newborn and my son was about 18 months I gave him his bath right after lunch. That and some milk usually soothed him enough to take a nap. When my kids were older, I often take them for a ride in the afternoon. I can get naps to happen that way. I built in physical activities in the morning and quieter activities in the afternoon. Good luck to you!
A.

Well do you have any neighbors, that you trust???
Maybe they can help?

Can you afford some part-time help???
If so, then do so. Tell your Hubby.

Girls...are that way.
I have a girl.
They are.... very much like that.

With 3 kids, this is par for the course.
I have 2 kids, and when I was at that stage with them, well that is how it was. And I am a SAHM, too.
I have a boy and girl.
They are very active kids and very expressive and... it was like that too.
But my kids, nap.
Still do.
And they are 4 (almost 5) and 8 years old.

Yes, parenting is that way.
BUT.... your HUSBAND HAS TO HELP ONCE HE IS HOME.
It is HIS kids too, and HIS home too, and HE has to help in all the chores and helping with the kids and bedtime and bath time... TOO.
That is his RESPONSIBILITY, too.
It is not a choice.

AND you need to, get away for your own time too.
AND Hubby can babysit.
A Husband, can do ANYTHING a woman/Mom does... except breastfeed. And even at that, they can use a bottle to feed baby.

AND Husband SHOULD BE... helping in getting the older kids to bed at night. Because you have the infant, to feed/and take care of.
AND Husband can be waking up during the night too... whenever one of the children, wakes.

So.... to problem-solve this... you have to, have Husband, help too, and delegate things to him.
Even if that means, making a 'Daddy Do-List" for him. And posting it up on the wall.

I only have 2 kids, girls, 6 and 4 so I can not comment on the reality of having a 6 month old too. But I can say, that all Summer from 2-3:30 my kids had independent quiet time. They did not have to nap, but they had to be in their rooms, doors closed. Many days my 6 year old was the one who fell asleep! That hour and a half is a great time to prep dinner or watch adult programming for a few minutes. I also clean the bathroom while my kids are in the bath (again, no 6 month old). We also do family cleaning time. Everyone cleans. And the cleaning has to be done to do the fun stuff, like a trip to the park or library (both free). The kids make their beds, put laundry in the baskets, and clean the playroom. I do the real stuff. :) But the real trick to this whole parenting thing is to work on your perspective. I have learned to find joy in the work that I do. And really, if I work well, I can make a huge dent in just a few hours. I would never say that my house is guest ready or clean clean, but it is a home not a museum and I am learning to be okay with that.

You're not alone. I find it overwhelming to keep up , also. You just need to do what you can & not worry about things being perfect. Try to stick w/ a schedule & have your girls help w/ what they are able.

Sending you a huge hug!! I so feel your pain!!

It is never to late to make a schedule-they work and are a life saver :) I have a 41/2 and a 51/2 yr old-both still nap from 1:30-3pm each day-so I know I can nap or do things or just sit and think-LOL! Then we go to bed at 8:30 pm each night-now they may be up till 9pm , but they stay in their beds and never tried to come out-they wait for me to come get them :) and then we get up at 7am each day-sometimes a bit earlier just depends. We eat at a certain time-it helps-they usually are really good and do not give me any problems-my son gets to be bit of a handful, but usually cooperates. Find a schedule that works for you and stick to it-I do wash sometimes in the morning or at night while they are coloring or watching a movie-I make dinner when they get up from their nap and they entertain themselves or dad helps and cleaning I do something everday-if they are watching tv I go wipe down the kitchen-I can still see them or I vaccuum or dust. Hope this helps :) L.

My girls are almost-5y, 3y and 9 months and yeah, some days it's a countdown to bedtime! haha

Get your older girls involved with the cleaning. Give them a cloth with some water and vinegar and let them go to town on the house - mine LOVE to help. Get them to put away the laundry once it's folded or unload the dishwasher once you remove the knives. Bake with the older 2. My girls love to help me cook.

Get outside. It doesn't cost you anything to take your kids for a walk. Do it early if it's going to be a hot day. Let the girls collect rocks, leaves and sticks for glueing and painting later in the day.

For those tough hours just before daddy gets home - the world is NOT going to end if you put on a 30 min show or 2 for your girls to chill out and watch. As long as they're not parked in front of the tv all day, it really is OK to watch a little age-appropriate tv once in a while. I promise :)

Sometimes when I'm ready to lose it, I throw my older 2 into the tub. They LOVE having a bath and playing and it keeps them happy.

well the house isn't as clean or organized when kids are off from school. I don't even stress about it. I have come to realize if I take my kids out most of the days and then spend the rest of the way at home, they behave much better. so we usually spend our mornings at a beach, or park, or bookstore, or organize playdates. i am not bothered by the mess because it won't get done and it will only cause me frustration. teach your kids how to love arts and crafts. have things organized like water color time, dress up time, drawing time, singing time, show time (modeling, dancing, singing etc). try to get out of the house, either backyard, or park, or somewhere where they can run free. exhaust them for a few hours then come home :)

it DOES get easier- I have Twin 5 yr olds and a 7 yr old & believe me- I HEAR YOU!!! I have so many days like that...your 6 yr old is in school all day correct? THAT was a huge turning point for me....although i don;t believe in tv to babysit- at your hardest moments- 2-4 I believe you said- find a show/movie...but witht he attention span thing a 30 min tv show may be better...IT IS OK to allow them to "veg" in front of a TV for a little while for them and for YOU...believe it or not....the looney tunes cartoon "captivates" my kiddos better than a movie etc...weird but true..try it & good luck

This is totally par for the course. And it will get easier once one or more of them go to school. I can HARDLY WAIT for school to start in 1.5 weeks! It has been a long, long summer. One of mine will be gone all day, another for half a day and I'll still have the baby at home.

Try to get them outside as much as possible to burn off that physical energy that they have. When you're stuck inside, try to separate the girls when they're fighting. I've survived the summer by trying to keep my older two separated as much as possible.

I'm glad your hubby helps with the kids at night. That makes a big difference. Mine plays with the kids, or takes them outside then helps with baths and bedtime. But of course, I'm the one still up doing dishes or laundry at 10:00 pm. I think that's pretty normal too.

Best wishes!

During those times when I feel like I can't take it anymore I turn on a movie everyone loves, put a big mattress in the living room and lay on it with all the kids. Sometimes just being a lazy kid yourself takes the pressure off being the perfect mom all the time.