Is This Normal 5 1/2 Year Old Sexual Behavior?

all ideas come from somewhere. yes kids come up with some things on their own but they all come from something. I would be interested in finding out who all my child plays with- it might have been another child's OOPS walking in on parents and the ideas spread

It's not normal.
Not only do you need to work with the older one, you've got to do the same with the younger one since the older one is using him.
Protect the younger one from the older one.
Avoid leaving them alone together.

.

Unfortunately, there is no limit to what kids hear on the school bus or at the playground. So the vocabulary itself doesn't alarm me. It is also completely normal for a child to be interested in his OWN anatomy and parts. However, it is not normal for him to be undressing his brother, touching him, and then lying about it. Curiosity, yes. Being able to see those parts better on his brother than on himself, yes. Active touching and trying to get the younger one to cover it up? No. This is learned behavior, somehow. I'm not sure that all of it was in his head. I think you need to speak with him, gently, in order to find out what experiences he has had. Explain that no one touches those body parts except the "owner" and the doctor and the parents (but only during a bath and while changing diapers). And I think both kids need to be checked by the doctor.

Put your Sherlock Holmes hat on and do some investigating. Kissing and Weenie should not be in the same sentence coming from a 5 yr old, my best guess is that he saw or heard "something" somewhere somehow.

In my opinion - ALARM BELLS ARE GOING OFF!!! In my head there is no reason a 5.5 year old should KNOW this. he was shown it, seen it or experienced it.

This is NOT acceptable behavior. At this point - call your pediatrician and tell them what is going on. Get your son to talk to you - not accusingly about this "thought" and see where it leads.

Ensure you are talking WITH your kids about personal space, privacy and the no touching - if they have been touched - they can tell you ANYTHING. If they see or sense panic - especially in your eyes - they will be quiet - but if, say, you are eating dinner - say something like - where did you learn the game you were playing today? let them talk - no matter what they tell you - DO NOT PANIC! I know that's hard (as I had a teacher call my son stupid once and I should've killed her..it took EVERYTHING in my power to just say "oh, really? tell me more....got as much information then called the school and said OVER MY DEAD BODY"...) any way - get them to talking...listen.

Make an appointment with the pediatrician ASAP. Watch them, especially him...and let them know that NO ONE is to touch them in their private parts, they can tell you if something like this was to happen - there are NO SECRETS...

Best of luck!! You will be in my thoughts and prayers!

Here is my two cents....if I were to stumble on this behavior in children (I'm a teacher) I would immediately get the social worker and DCFS involved because this behavior is not typical in children. It is alarming and needs to be addressed. How you handle this will determine how comfortable your child is with sharing details. You need to find the courage to have a candid talk with your son. It is possible that he stumbled upon something he shouldn't have seen/heard, but the fact that he is acting it out and telling your younger son to to keep it quiet is bothersome. Your little one could also be feeling violated as well since he certainly does not understand and needs to be taught again that NO ONE touches him there.

If your child truely just had the idea in his head, maybe a discussion with your pediatrician is a good idea. He/she could recommend a good child therapist to talk with your son. In my opinoin you should be just as concerned with your lil one on the receiving end and want to make sure this never happens again.

I'm sorry you have to go through this. Hopefully you will find some answers soon. For now, talk with your child and don't give up until you have this solved. Best Wishes

I would just gently talk with your son, reassuring him that no one will get in trouble, to see if he'll tell you more about where this idea came from. If he spends any time with other kids in school or daycare, they talk and share. Like another responder said, another child could have seen something and talked about it. It is normal for kids to explore and experiment. I did it with my siblings and my cousins at this age.

I would not make a big deal out of it, unless this behavior continues. I would not talk with a pediatrician, I would be careful not to accuse anyone, or to become the accused, of anything inappropriate at this point.

No, it's not normal.

I think you need to figure out where this is coming from. Perhaps have your husband talk with him and see if he can find out where he was exposed to such things??? IF someone has done something to him, they most likely threatened him and told him not to tell. So he may need some coaxing from you to open up.

Sit down and play play-doh. Get him comfortable and start talking to him. Remind him that secrets are NOT okay. That you will NEVER be mad at him for anything he tells you. And then ask him if anyone has told him that he had to keep something a secret. You may be able to get him to open up once he realizes HE is not in trouble.

If you can't get him to tell you (BUT YOU STILL THINK SOMETHING MAY HAVE HAPPENED), you need to get some professional help! (Which you will need for him IF someone has done something to him.)

Good luck!

I wouldn't get too crazy with assumptions...not yet, and especially if you absolutely have no idea where he got this idea. Children will explore their body parts at this age (between 5-7). Years ago kids played doctor. Many will be seen touching themselves, etc. This is normal. They do need to be told not to touch others, including siblings. As far as using the term 'girl weenie kissing' he may have heard this at school. Students will hear all kinds of things on the playground. Many hear it from older siblings and then they bring it to the playground or maybe he is very creative. You will not be able to control everything your child hears. Personally, I would just be aware that he may be in this stage. I would also listen, watch, and keep communications open about everything. So that if he needs to share anything with you then he feels comfortable enough to do that with you. To answer your last question: Yes, he may be creative enough and thought about this himself. At this point...I wouldn't worry about it...move on, but keep your eyes open.

I have an 8 yo and I haven't encountered anything like this. Is there a magazine, movie--ANYWHERE he could have seen this?

It's normal for a 5 year old boy to touch on himself at times but I don't think its normal for him to want to touch on another boy. Usually when children are hiding and doing something in secret most of the time they know that it is wrong. Maybe you can just sit down with your children and teach them that its wrong to touch on other people that way and you should keep an close eye on them. If you have anybody babysit them then make sure that person watch them closely too. Also keep an eye on other people who are around your children too.

I would say these actions along with the ones in your previous post would make M. worry that hes being abused...i would def take inventory on everyone hes watched by, possibly ask the teacher if there is any of this at school, maybe another kid was abused and showed him? idk i watched to many suspense movies growing up so maybe im a worry wart

This sounds odd to me. The act of oral sex isn't understood until it is learned. He had to have had an idea of what it was for the girl weenie kissing comment. Those words had to have been said or he has come across something of some sort. Exploration is so very normal. The comment would have alarmed me.

It's a little on the edge, but possibly normal. When he's 6, and he's still doing this, then I don't think it's normal.

Keep an eye on it, if it keeps continuing then it's something you need to worry about. And your 3-1/2 year old may not particularly like it, so he shouldn't have his brother experimenting on him. At this point in time, you need to tell him that he can't experiment on other people's genitals.

Also, if he knows enough to hide it, that says something.

I assume you know who your son has been exposed to. (See the recent post about molestation.)

When I was five, I was friends with a neighborhood boy (he was 6) and he would tell me all sorts of stuff about sex and convince me to act out stuff with him. I was naive and didn't know any better, so I did it (mostly touching, similar to what you've described). Neither of us knew what sex really was, but as I think about it now, it was very disturbing that he knew about and would talk about all of this. He told me that he heard about it all from his older brother (who was a teenager). He moved away soon afterwards, so I don't know if he was molested or anything like that. I was never molested (unless you count acting things out with a 6-year-old boy) but I heard all about these things from that particular friend. It could be possible that your son is hearing it from someone else at school. Or does he play with other kids in the neighborhood unsupervised? That's what happened with me; we'd play at his house or my house (he lived two doors down) and our parents wouldn't constantly supervise us (because we were old enough to play on our own).

Definitely reiterate what you've already told them about not touching other's private areas, and then try to ask him if he's heard about this from somewhere. He's only five, so it is possible that he will tell you where he heard about doing these things. Hopefully with a little prodding, you will be able to figure it out. I wouldn't talk to the pediatrician yet (unless you are really concerned about it); just keep an eye out for it happening again. If you've talked to him several times and it keeps happening, then it might be a good idea to talk to his teacher about who he's playing with on the playground and ask the pediatrician what he/she thinks about the behavior.

He may have seen part of a movie he shouldn't have, but I would talk to your pediatrician like Ellis said just to be safe.

Predators both teach sexual acts and expose children to pornographic images. Be aware that as you speak to close individuals, the most compassionate and understanding one may be a predator himself. When I was concerned about something at my son's school, I accidentally ended up speaking to the predator about my concerns.