Is This Normal? - Natrona Heights, PA

Updated on July 14, 2007
B.P. asks from Natrona Heights, PA
18 answers

I have an almost 9 month old son. He is whining A LOT and crying/screaming all the time. This has only recently started maybe a month ago. Generally he's a really happy baby but he will get into moods and it seems like the older he gets the worse they get. I try everything, playing on the floor, reading, feeding, changing. He's only ever happy if I'm holding him. And we didn't hold him all the time when he was really little because we didn't want him to be so dependant on us that we were holding him all the time. He does have 5 teeth so I try orajel which also doesn't seem to work. He crawls very well and he's recently started to pull himself to a standing position on furniture too so he's progressing well. I just can't understand why he is so unhappy. My house is a mess and I can't seem to get anything done. When my husband finally comes home from work he has things around the house he has to do so its like I don't ever get a break. I almost wish I worked. I HATE to exercise and I go to the gym a couple times a week for a weight training class just to get away for an hour. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm whining (here I am complaining about whining lol) but I don't know who to ask. We go to the doctor next week and I'm going to ask her but I wanted to try here too. Any advice on how to get through this?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Everyone thank you SO MUCH for the replies! I found something almost by mistake. I had a HUGE pillow on the ground and he was throwing himself on it and climbing all over it lol so I promptly moved it away from everything so he didn't hit his head and cut the tags off and he entertained himself for about 30 min. It was amazing! I am going to try out those Teething Tablets as well and sign up for The Wonder Weeks. Those sound like GREAT ideas.
I do put him in day care when I'm at the gym because I go in the mornings. He also goes to my mother in laws house where she watches her other 3 grandkids and they like to play around with the baby too. Yesterday was just a super bad day I think lol We had a long weekend with his first roadtrip to Cleveland (2.5 hours) and that was the only difference, we've always lived in the same place and no other changes. I was actually looking forward to going to the hospital to have blood drawn LOL. My hubby does help me a lot, but he doesn't understand about stay at home moms getting no breaks. He can take a day and go outside to work on his car. I don't get to take a day lol. Thank you so much for all of the support!

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

It is completely normal! It's probably NOT teething or an ear infection. It's probably an early entrance into the whiny days of toddler-hood. I'm right there with you with my 15 month old!

As far as how to get through it, I find that having a great support group of other Moms who understand makes ALL the difference in the world. Do you have other Mommy friends that you get together with? Do you go to a playgroup? If not, I'd be happy to have you come to the park with us one day! It's a lot of fun and a great time to veeeeeeeent sometimes too! Hang in there!! You're not alone. =)

-C.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.T.

answers from York on

It sounds like he is teething. My son gets moddy like that too. Have you tried Hyland's Homeopathic Teething Tablets. They are these really small dissolvable tablets that work wonders. I got mine at Walmart in the baby section by the toothbrushes/pacifiers. The come in a pink and blue box. Try these and see how it works!

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.M.

answers from Pittsburgh on

He is probably teething! My son acts like that when he is. Normally he plays all by himself and behaves great, but when he is teething nothing seems to make him happy. Try some baby tylenol, it works like a charm. Orajel never gave my son any relif, maybe thats the case with your son too. Also make sure he is getting enough sleep. If he is crying too much lay him down in his crib and walk away for a few minutes (10 or so). It gives you a break and maybe some time for him to fall asleep. A nice nap may put him in a better mood. Another tought, has there been any changes? My son cried for days straight after we moved.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.N.

answers from Pittsburgh on

HI B.,

You are not whinning , btw, you are pretty much like most mothers, lol. Sometimes, you just need to vent.

I do know that around 9 mos.. my kids ( I have 3 and one due any day now) went thru this stage of seperation anxiety. Could be that plus the teeth.

Believe me, when you have kids, it's almost impossible to have a clean house most of the time. I heard this saying, which I totally belive now, CLEANING THE HOUSE WHILE YOUR KIDS ARE GROWING UP IS LIKE SHOVELING DURING A BLIZZARD. HAHAH. I do try to clean, but I"e learned that somethings are jsut more important when they are little.

I know what u mean about work too, I used to work, now I'm home all day every day, with my kids. My husband doesnt get home till after 7, and is usually tired too, so it's like, ok, who gets the break here. Sometimes it takes a toll, but keep your head up high and know this too shall pass.

Take care and God Bless,

L.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi B.!
How many naps a day is your son getting? Maybe he's not getting enough sleep? My son (3rd one) will be 1 on Thurs. and he went through a little spurt of fussiness around that time too. He also started waking up in the middle of the night a few times and he hasn't done that since 6 weeks old. Another idea is to maybe get him out around some other kids. Not sure where you live, but maybe look into a mom's group, or see if there are any neighbors around with kids. My son can be in the worst mood, but when he sees his brother & sister (7 & 9) he gets so excited. Also since you mentioned that you go to the gym at night - maybe if they have a daycare there you could go during the day & take the baby with you. Then when daddy comes home, make sure daddy occupies the baby during what would have been "gym time" so you can get something done around the house. I know - easier said then done! I wouldn't worry too much about it as long as he is healthy, he will probably outgrow it.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.R.

answers from Allentown on

What your son is doing is very normal for this age. He is going through a clingy phase, which is normal around 9-10 months of age, and again around 18 months.

What I found with my kids was that if I met a need that they had--in this case the need to be near you a LOT--then they went through the phase faster. If I tried to resist it and push them toward independence, it tended to back-fire in more misbehaviors. So try to find ways to include your son in what you are doing. I LOVE using a sling, simply because in these clingy times I could put the baby on my back, and then attend to my cooking and cleaning. Afternoon nap? I laid down with the baby--a mom needs a bit of a break too! (You will generally wake up before your son, and that is your chance to get some things done that you can't when he is awake).

Hugs, and good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.B.

answers from Lancaster on

Hi B.!
Yes...very normal...but it is always good to ask yourself some questions...is he eating normally....have you been feeding a new food that could be upsetting his tummy...is he overtired, overstimulated? Try dimming the lights or turning on soothing music during playtime. Also...give yourself a break when you can...he may be sensing your stress!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.O.

answers from Pittsburgh on

don't worry, it's just a phase and it will pass...my little guy did the same thing around that age, then again at like 15-16 months old...would not let me change his diaper and would have a tantrum. What I think the problem is that they want to communicate and get so DAMN frustrated your not understanding them the only thing they can do is throw a fit!! imagine no one understanding you all the time...you two will learn how to communicate and interact with one another, he's getting to learn all about you and you the same with him...trust me, your little guy will be back!! So just relax, he's probably just smarter than both of you realize!! Good luck!! And I think the hour away is a good thing....

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.P.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi B.! Yes it is normal. It is also normal for you to want to run away and wonder what you have done with your life!! It gets better, so much better. I give you and other stay at home moms alot of credit - it's hard to do anything 24/7. You are not whining, you are overwhelmed. My advice is two parts, the first is your baby does depend on you and now that he is able to do more things he is more clingy to his mommy. Do you have a scheduled nap time for him? Make a schedule for yourself and him, obviously it doesn't have to be kept to by the minute, but try to stick to it. Once he knows what is expected of him (when Mommy is done with something I will get time just with Mommy), things will start to fall into place. Second, get your husband more involved, I know mine didn't know what I needed till I told him exactly what I did need.
I hope this helps, my daughter is 2 1/2 and I thought I would go crazy the first year. Now I live for every minute I can spend with my family, it does get better - a lot better!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.D.

answers from Philadelphia on

B.,

Your right orajel doesn't work. He may be teething which, as we all might know, when we don't feel good we mant mom to hold us in comfort. There is a product called "Teething Tablets" in the pharmacy of your local walmart(I hate to even suggest that store). This product is all natural so it can be taken as often as needed. It dissolves quickly under the tongue so it should prevent alot of the drooling when more teeth come through. I tryed this product on my neighbor before I gave it to me daughter, His toothache seem to disappear rather quickly. This product saved our lives. However our daughter st ill wants to be heald from time to time but when she learned to walk on her own thats what she wanted to do most often, instead of holding her we chase her around to house. If you can't find this product feel free to email me at ____@____.com and I help you find some. If he still wants to be held its ok, when he learns to walk on his own he should give up wanting to be held. Good luck!

D.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.N.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi

Could he be bored or frustrated with his toys? Maybe introduce something new. Instruments, finger painting, pop up toys, puppets, crawl tunnel, etc. Also, my son loved baths so when he got really fussy I would put him in the tub and blow bubbles and play with foam. Maybe enroll him in a playgroup or Gymboree/YMCA. Staying home is definitely a challenge and it always require extensive creativity on the mom's part and frequent change of scenery to keep the child engaged and happy. P.S. Everyone's house with an infant/toddler is a mess! I too feel it would be easier to be at work. Have been out of the corporate world for almost 3 years.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Reading on

Whenever my daughters acted like that, it was usually because they were sick (usually an ear infection was the culprit). If not that, it could just be that he's going through a clingy stage. This too shall pass. Try using a baby carrier and letting him go everywhere with you. If that doesn't seem to help, then try some tylenol or motrin. Maybe those teeth are really hurting as they're coming in.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

i know how you feel my daughter is nine months and does the same thing....i call it the seperation/frustration age. They want to do stuff that frustrates them (walking) but they want to stay close to you...I just set up new things for her to do and her favorite is to help me with the laundry i put her in the basket with the socks when i do the dishes i give her a bowl full of her own bowls...etc. It worked well with my daughter now and it worked well with my other two children....

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.C.

answers from Reading on

My daughter use to be the easiest going happy baby ever. But she is now 9 months and always wants to be held also. I think it is just the age. Try getting a basket and filling it with toys for your little one to dig through and pull out... It seems to give you a couple of minutes. It is just a stage though I am sure it will pass.... Possibly seperation axiety... To a baby when you leave the room you are gone... Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Dear B.,
I totally understand not being able to get anything done. It's very hard with children at home. My daughter was very much the same way at this age. At the time we lived in a very small duplex and there just wasn't any room for her to move around. I discovered that when the area she was in, (living room , playroom, bedroom, whereever) when it was tidy and there was room for her to move and explore, that she was much happier. Now, I am not trying to say that your home is dirty or anything like that, but the more room that a baby has to roam and explore, the happier they seem to be. Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.K.

answers from Philadelphia on

I don't believe it's possible to hold a child too much. I second the recommendation for a sling--it can really help things! A nice long walk with the baby in the sling can do much for both of your moods.

The teething could be part of it, although my daughter had most of her teething pain at night. I know those teething tablets are good, but so is infant ibuproffen. :)

He's also going through a development spurt. There is a great book called The Wonder Weeks that catalogs every development spurt so you can be prepared--each spurt comes with whining and clinging. It just means his brain is growing!

Good luck to you.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.J.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi there! I agree with the other girls - probly teething - always check with your Dr. though - to rule out any underlying conditions. When my daughter gets like this we do alot of outdoors stuff to keep her preoccupied - a trip to target, a drive to the park..it takes her mind off it, and gives her something to look at - and it gives you a break from entertaining. Yes motherhood is the hardest job in the world - but the best job in the world :} Hang in there it gets better *HUGS* K. I've heard those Hylands teething tabs are wonderful.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.V.

answers from Philadelphia on

Hi B.,

Your son could have an ear infection...sometimes they come without fevers and they don't act sick, except for the fact that they are in pain and want to be held. You may want to try and get to the doc before next week, just to give you a little peace of mind, have him checked out. My kids always got very clingy when they were not feeling well and I can understand how overwhelming it can be for you not to be able to carry on with your daily life!!

I hope this helps you and your little son!

Take care,

P.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions