Is Wondering How Other Sahm's Get Everything Done

I am a SAHM to a 19 month old busy little guy. My husband works outside the house, and I handle the paperwork for our business--paying bills, ordering, etc. Our day goes like this--wake up at 6:30, play with dad while mom makes breakfast and coffee. Send dad to work, watch cartoons for about 30-45 min while mom gets her game face on and figures out the day :) I cook every single day, we don't have help and on Mon and Tue, I watch a 3 month old boy for 8 hours a day. My son is very independent and is happy to play by himself while I get laundry started and lunch/dinner. Nap is at 12pm sharp, and for the hour beforehand, we eat lunch and read books. He naps for about 2 hours during which time I clean the kitchen, start dinner, dust and pick up the house. Once he is up, we do a chore together--whether it is vacuuming, folding laundry or emptying the garbage cans. Then dad comes home, play time, dinner, bath and asleep by 7:45pm. It is crucial for me to have a plan for the day, because otherwise I get too scatterbrained and my son can feel that and feeds off my energy and gets hyper, so to speak. On Wed, we have a playgroup, and on Thur, we have a music group for tots. I"m not saying that my house is clean, but I'd rather have a happy baby than a spotless house :)
COngratulations on your pregnancy, you just need to know that things will get done eventually and not stress out too much!

Ugh, I DON'T get everything done...and probably never will. I have a three-year-old and a three-month-old. But here are some things I do to make life a little easier:

As far as minimizing cleaning, I've found that the key is "maintaining" on a regular basis rather than letting things build up and taking on major cleaning projects. For example, about a year ago I scrubbed our bathrooms down because they were filthy (took me forever) and put myself on a once-a-week bathroom cleaning schedule. Now it takes me less than 45 minutes to clean THREE bathrooms (and one is quite large) because I just have to wipe things down once a week instead of letting it go and then having to scrub for hours. As for the rest of the house, my husband and I took turns watching the kids and organized and cleaned the house from top to bottom. Now we're trying to maintain by picking up at the end of each day (only takes 10 minutes) so that we don't end up with piles of stuff everywhere. I also quickly clean the kitchen counters, sink, etc. before going to bed. I focus on keeping the house neat and let things like dusting go for the most part(except for my son's room--I dust once a week because of his asthma.) There is website--www.flylady.net--that I haven't tried but I know some people swear by it. It's free and helps you get get on a cleaning schedule. I'm still working on my cleaning schedule and it's an ongoing process. It's VERY hard for me to get anything done while the kids are awake. I either wait until they are napping or in bed in the evening. I do some of the bigger cleaning things on the weekend while my husband watches the kids and vice versa. Sometimes we'll have friends/relatives come over on the weekend to play with the kids while we putter around the house.

You don't mention your husband...but he really needs to be helping with the household chores if he's not. It doesn't matter that you are a SAHM mom, he still needs to be sharing in the cleaning. Unfortunately there are some husbands that are under the impression that SAHM's are their maids...I hope that's not the case in your situation. Thankfully my husband knows how ridiculously hard it is to try to clean the house with kids at home (especially while pregnant and tired) so he takes on his share of duties.

As far as meal preparation, I guess I do what I would call "meal assemblage" rather than real cooking. I go to Trader Joe's where they have a lot of prepared or easy-to-prepare items for reasonable prices. For example, if I'm making a stir-fry I'll pick up the pre-cut vegetables to cut down on chopping time. I have a new baby so I haven't been doing this, but in the past I've taken about 20 minutes on Saturday to plan on the menu for the week and then gone shopping on Sunday for everything.

Hope that helps.

Hi! J.:
I am a full-time stay-at-home Mom to our 3-1/2 year old son and 2 year old daughter. We do not have outside help.....I do it all (well, my husband handles the finances). My son is in preschool M-F from 11 to 2 and this is the time when I get things done. I do not work from home though. Here is what has worked for me; any paperwork or similar that needs my full attention is done when my daughter is napping. She always takes a 1-1/2 to 2 hour nap so that is prime time for me.
I hope this is somewhat helpful. It's challenging for sure. Good luck to you!

I am currently working about 10 hr/wk also, and I still have trouble doing it all, even though my kids are older and in school. =)
I find that priorities can change from day to day, but there are some that are always on top---like don't let the dishes or laundry go, or they will take over your living space before you know it. Vacuuming I will let slide...it doesn't look as nice, but it doesn't take up space, and can be caught up on so much quicker than dishes or laundry.
I try to keep certain staples of food around, so that if I get too far behind before dinner, I can throw something together quickly. I like to keep dry pasta, sauces, fresh or frozen meat, frozen vegetables, and broth.
I have found that it helps to take a more minimalist approach to decorating---fewer things to straighten or dust.
FYI: As your children enter school you will find that huge piles of paper start to accumulate---schoolwork, school art work, newsletters and flyers...deal with important things immediately, and put the rest on the recycle bin immediately! If you try to save things you don't need, you will find yourself, and all of your tables, buried in paper...and you will lose the important ones in the shuffle.

hi J., i have the same problem, and didn't even have time to read the other responses! i have 2 kids 2 and under, it's tough! here's what has helped me. (sorry if some are repeats).. when i cook, my daughter plays with playdoh at the table. she is 26 months (but we started this many months ago). at first she wanted me to sit and help so i did, but now she plays for a good 20 mins on her own. i put my son, who is 9 months in the highchair close to me and give him cheerios and a toy to play with. i can get cooking and cleaning done in the kitchen like this. another thing that works for us... i bought a "cleaning kit" for my daughter. a little vacuum, mop, gloves, sponge etc. we started this when she was 18 mos or so. got it at toys r us. she cleans next to me. she also rides the vacuum which is a big hit. when in doubt, if i really am in trouble, i put on sesame street or super why. i know tv is not ideal, but at least these 2 shows are educational and i don't put it on for long. when my daughter was 16 month, we just had our second and i just let things go. if i did laundry, she would unfold it. if i swept the floor, she messed up my piles. you get the picture. just let your house be messy for a few more months and it will get better! also, my daughter is a super light sleeper, so i couldn't do much when she was asleep, but maybe you can. oh, one more tip, when i had to work at the computer, i gave my daughter a calculator and that occupied her. she also "helps" with dinner, and stirs dried beans in a big pot then scoops them in tupperware. it makes a mess but she is happy and occupied. we also set up tupperware outside with water and she plays with cups on the lawn. it is tough being creative when you are busy, but just keep your daughter busy. give her a grocery bag to fill up, plastic jewelry to try on, crayons, washable markets etc. good luck. it is tough but gets better.

Stop trying to get everything done! So what if you have sandwiches for dinner once in a while or the house isn't in perfect order. Leave the big things you need to get done for the weekend when dad can take over caring for the little one. I speak from experience when I tell you that the only thing you're going to remember years from now is the time you spend (or didn't spend) with your child and the experiences you share together. The rest of it won't matter. One day soon you will find yourself watching videos of your daughter as a baby and young child and asking yourself what happened to the time. Tears will be in your eyes as you wish you could turn back time just for one day in order to hold and touch her as a baby again. Take a lot of photos and videos and enjoy her every moment you can! You're going to love her just as much when she's an adult - maybe even more - but you will miss your little girl!

You are already doing a wonderful job. I too am a SAHM and feel that I can never get "done" with everything and I finally allowed myself to let it go.

You are expecting too much of yourself and being way too hard on yourself. You have already enriched so many peoples lives with giving life to your first child and now you are going to reward us all again with another. This is what you need to focus on, the housework can wait .... mine does and I don't fuss about it anymore. My friends come to visit me and if my home is messy with toys etc, then so be it.. it's only toys. If it bothers them, then, they are not true friends.

Sit down on occasion when your child is napping and call a friend or read a few pages of a magazine. You are not a machine.... don't exhaust yourself. You are pregnant and need to look after yourself. Enjoy this time with your daughter, you will have the rest of your life for cleaning your home. In 20 years from now, would you rather have memories of a shiny sink or the great time you had rolling around on the floor tickling your baby and laughing like you couldn't be any happier. Before you know it, your kids will be gone ... don't misuse your time on things that are really not that important.

Congrats on your pregnancy... I wish you well.