Miscarriage, Memorial Gift

I was in my first trimester, just a month ago, when I lost my little baby, and I want to do something like that myself. It probably depends on the person, but I would have loved it.
To me, as soon as I found out I was having another baby, it truly was my baby. Even if I was only a few weeks pregnant, it was already a person to me. It's a very nice idea. If you want to make it a little less "personal" (for lack of better words), maybe try a rose bush, or something. My mother planted a rose bush in her garden each time one of her children graduated highschool, and I love that idea for representing a child.
Good luck!

That is really sweet, but I would echo what someone else said about it maybe not being appropriate for a really early loss. I've had two at 6 weeks or less and I don't knwo that I would have wanted something like that particularly. It may have just made it harder. Hope that helps.
K.

T.,
I think it would be a very nice idea to give your friend something special to remember her baby. I lost a baby 18 months ago. No one knows how painful it is much less understand why you grieve. If I would have heard "it was for the best" one more time I would have FLIPPED !! It would have meant alot to me if someone would have done that for me.

Good luck on trying to conceive !!

Blessings,
A.

Hi T.,
I think that is a wonderful, thoughtful idea. I wish someone would have done that for me when I miscarried 22 years ago, I ahve 2 boys now but that loss never really leaves you, and alot of people don't understand the devestation of losing your baby, I think it is something she will treasure forever.
L.

Hello T.,
I think that would be so sweet of you to do that for your friend.I see that you have been trying to your second child for 2 years I wish you the best of luck.
Your friend is so lucky to have u in her life.I had a miscarriage 6 months ago and no one ever did that for me and that sounds really great.I think that she is going to love that.Another thing is My sister in law and i was due 2 weeks apart and she just had her baby on Wednesday and that day i was amess I cried all day long because i knew that it was almost my time for my peanut to come and it's not going to happen.So what i'm trying to say is that she needs you know but also around her due date is just as bad.

Good luck to you with your baby making and tell your friend i feel for her.

HUgs H. F

I lost a son in my second trimester and I think what you are doing is great. You are a true friend.

I think it is a great idea. When my daughter lost our granddaughter I painted ceramic angels with her name and date on them and now 2 years later they sit in a flower graden in her memeory.

Your heart is in the right place. I feel a memorial gift is a wonderful thing to do. I say this because i also had a miscarriage many years ago. It was so very h*** o* me. If someone would of got me a memorial gift for my baby that past, i would of felt very warm inside and to know that someone loved and cared.

I think its great that your a stay at home mom you do not hear of that to often anymore. Keep trying for your second child a lot of love goes on forever and always makes a happy home. I also want to say the silver cross is a wonderful gift

I think that is a wonderful idea. I did something similar when a friend lost her baby a few years ago. Here is a link to a website that has some wonderful things http://www.labelledame.com/miscarriage-infant-loss.html

I think that is a very appropriate and thoughtful gift if you are a close friend and know she will be accepting of it.

If you don't know her so well you might want to skip the gift and simply send a card or say I'm sorry. My reason for suggesting this is that I've known a few people who experienced a lot of sorrow and bitterness at the loss of their unborn children. Well-intentioned words of wisdom, gifts, etc seemed to make their pain worse.

Just my personal opinion - I would not have wanted something like that. I was 22.5 weeks along when I lost my daughter and it has been a tough 10 year struggle to get back to what everyone would consider to be "normal". I would absolutely not want that kind of a reminder. On the surface it seems very thoughtful, but ask if she would mind first. I realize not everyone is like me so she may be receptive to it.

A shoulder to cry on is probably the best gift she could receive right now and again on her due date.

K.

You are a true friend and it shows. Only you can read your friends emotions and maybe know enough about her to know how she might feel about receiving a gift like that. I have not miscarried but know that everyone feels differently about thier loss. I personally would not want to display an item to remind me of my loss, however I would welcome the thought and love that comes with a gift that I can tuck away and pull out when I choose to sit and think about my/our loss. I think a "I'm here for you" type of card with a small item (if she is religous - say a cross or a medal/statue of one of the saints or Mary) might be just what she needs to remind her of the ones that care for her.

Hi T.,
I think it's a good idea, but how far along was your friend? I miscarried in Jan. and I was only around 5 weeks or so and quite honestly I wouldn't have felt it appropriate to receive gifts for that loss, but talking to friends and family was good for it. But everyone grieves differently, I was ok w/the miscarriage, (feeling it happened for a reason) and not everyone gets over that kind of loss as easily as I did. (Please don't think that I didn't care- that is NOT at all the case!) But if your friend was further along (knew what she was having, name, etc...) then I'd say go for it. Goodluck! I'm glad others have friends like you!

I think that would be beautiful! Just let her know that you are always there for support. I lost a baby that would have been two in June and it still hurts so bad. I wish someone would have been that considerate to me. You are a good friend.

That is very sweet and thoughtful of you. I miscarried back in January of this year and I think about what would be if it didn't happen.
I loved that child even though I didn't find out what he/she would have been.
That child is our angel.....

I think it would be nice

I think a small memorial gift would be a wonderful idea & validate that fact that their baby mattered. I lost a baby very early in the pregnancy. Once I stopped crying, it seemed like people forgot. My due date was the hardest b/c no one remembered. So, you might want to send a card or give a call on her due date & the year anniversary of their loss. To me, its almost like people don't count the baby I lost. I would buy something small that can be put away, if they don't want to display it. Each peson is different. Some want to just move one & forget, while others want a small reminder where I can feel close to my baby. I bought a small statue of a tiny angel in big hands. Also, I got a tatoo. I'm glad they named the baby. It really helped me validate my daughter as a person, not just cells & tissue that failed to develop.