I would love to bend the ears of other Mamasource moms who have children who are very active, spirited, intense and strong-willed. We have gone through many struggles and are continuing to have more. The stress level at times is overwhelming and it is very difficult to maintain the patience we are supposed to have. Am so longing to have conversation with other moms who have walked or are walking this path of motherhood. If you are a mother of a spirited child, could you please email me personally?
Thank you.
I also have a 7 year old who is very strong willed and active - he has been my challenge from the day he was born lol! It is absolutely very hard to be patient with him, and we are constantly looking for new and different ways to handle him. please feel free to email me at ____@____.com - maybe we can help each other through it! :)
~T.
http://MamaWorksFromHome.NET
http://FamilyBenefitsLive.com
My 3 1/2 year old daughter is also strong willed. I have learned to give her more choices in what she does and that has helped her feel more in control of herself. I make sure the choices I give her are ones that I would be happy with either outcome. So it is really my choice but with her input. I read Dr. James Dobson's book "The Strong-Willed Child" It was very helpful. I bought it when she was 14 months old and screaming standing at my feet because she could not have something she wanted. I look back at that now and laugh because it was a classic power struggle and I was buying that book. I have since read through it twice and have learned a lot about how to parent her differently and how to not feel guilty for her behavior or actions. Good luck. Feel free to message me if you have any questions.
Hi K.,
I am not sure that my kids fit that description anymore, but I remember gaining insight from the book "Raising your spirited child" by (I think) Mary Kurcinka.
Take heart, it is easier to re-direct a child's will than it is to instill a will in a child who has none.
Good luck!
K. Z.
I have 3 girls they are 4, 7 and 12 let me tell you about strong willed they are very stubborn and yes it is overwhelming because I do not have the paitence we should have to deal with it so it turns in to yelling and arguing and I think to my self why am I arguing with a 4 year or 7 year old/ I understand completly , but I have no I dea any more how to handle these things either , feel free to email any time or call ###-###-#### H.
The biggest triumph I have gone through with my daughter (23 months) was learning how to change my expectations of myself, expecially with regard to my reactions to her behavior. I've found that the more calm I remain and the clearer I state my expectations of her, the more positive reaction from her. Now when she approaches situations she almost seems more prepared for how to experience her role within it. What's amazing is that I see her finding ways to keep herself calm and state her needs and wants clearly back to me. When she does this I praise her and tell her how much her actions made me proud. With your children I'm sure you see that their sprit is wonderfully matched with intelligence and imagination.
Hi K.,
My almost 6-year-old is very active, spirited, intense, and strong-willed. I tell myself they are great qualities to have, but it can be a real strain when it's us he's fighting!
I'd love to talk. Maybe we can help each stay sane!
P.
I have a little boy who fits this description. I would be happy to chat with you. I can be reached at ____@____.com.
J.
K.,
My son will be 8 on April 26th and he is VERY stubborn, strong-willed, active, etc. I completely understand when you say the stress level can be overwhelming. We have been going through many struggles with him lately and sometimes I feel like I am the only mother in the world this is happening to! I know that other moms deal with the same things but I too would love to talk to someone about it! Hope to hear from you.
A.
Please remember to let them know all the "rules" and things you ask them to do is to keep them from harm, danger, and to show them the way to be a good person. Those little people will test your patience but as they grow, if you keep with th program it will all be worth it. Do not give in or give up. Your are the parent and the teacher.
My 4 year old granddaughter sounds like your child. She is very hard to control at times. I take care of her all day while her mom works and at times my stress level is very high. She can be real calm and then just go off. If this sounds like something your child does maybe we can help each other.
Raised on who is now 28, raising one who is 10. Believe me, I know the struggles, joys, heart aches, smiles, frustrations, and the blessings.
You can email me at ____@____.com be sure to let me know what it is about so I don't delete you!!!
P.
Hi K.,
I have 3 kids. One out of the three is the classic strong-willed child. She is the one with the highest IQ and highest EQ. These kids can make the best leaders. There is a book called Boundaries With Kids by Cloud/Townsend (Book $17 and Workbook $10.) You learn to relinquish control and help your child build self-control. You learn to give up nagging and how to instill boundaries and consequences. You learn about Motivation and responsibility. It was worth it. My kid is great and I wouldn't change a thing.
I, too, have a strong willed son. I am a full time working mom and some days it is so overwhelming I just don't know what to do. My on-going joke to friends and family is "Are you looking to adopt? I will pay child support! I try to use love and patience to keep me going but I understand your position. My son will be three next month and I am praying for a miracle by the time he turns four. His Dad is very stern and I find myself being less stern because I am just tired and would like for him to have some room to express his self. I am not sure if I am helping him or hurting my son by this method. You can email me anytime. ____@____.com
I, too, am the mama of a strong-willed, intense, drama queen! I love her to death, but she does test me daily; hourly really! This child does not stop! She will be 6 in July and has yet to sleep thru a full night for me. Is always on the go, is distracted easily. I have spoken with her doctor about the possibility of ADHD, but she is not having trouble at school and that seems to be where most kids have trouble with sitting still, etc. Her doctor has told me that most of her behaviors are age related; it may take a while to see if there really is an ADHD problem. So until then, I struggle daily with her. We also have an 8 y/o son who is the complete opposite of his sister! He, too, finds her very frustrating. She wants what she wants, when she wants it!! I, too, am at a loss of what the next step is! Would be happy to hear from you-my e-mail is ____@____.com -we may not figure it all out, but at least we could support each other and have an outlet! You are not alone, my friend!
