Mother- Daughter Books

Good for you. Not repeating the pattern is so difficult but so worth it.

Instead of worring about it being a mother-daughter just look for books on healthy relationships. Go to a book store and just look through the books and buy the ones that seem to handle your issues. You will see a world of help in all of your relationships once you start to deal with the one with your Mom. Once you see your Mom's behavior as it really is you will be able to see how to stop it in yourself.

Seeking out a counselor will help a lot too. A good counselor will be able to help you see the emotions or fears your Mom had or has.

Good for you, J..

Don't have a book for you, but just remember to listen to your daughter more than give advice to her.

You may not heal all the wounds caused by your mother -- my personal opinion is that those things scar your soul, no matter how much you learn to move beyond them.

I hope you get some more good suggestions. My eldest and only daughter is 10, and our relationship is not the greatest. It's a personality thing with us. We are EXACTLY alike, yet clash because we are both Type A and both want to be in charge. I am constantly trying to talk to her in ways that will preempt a "situation" but she has such a short fuse. I can hardly wait for the teen years!

There's a book called Toxic Parents, by Susan Forward. Maybe not specific enough for you, but good. Or a good place to start. Maybe enter that title into Amazon as it will then suggest similar titles.

Good for you for being proactive and wanting better for your daughter, I hope you find some peace.