We just found out that in April we are moving to Washington state.. Seriously out dream come true like 2 years before we thought we could! I've been a SAHM for 2.5 years and we'll be living in an amazing place where I'll have an amazing job for 6 months that will pay our bills all year, we've been miserable here where we live and we're so excited to be able to raise our kids in the most beautiful part of the country.. Only one problem.. Me and my mom are SO close, she's my best friend and we live in separate states (like 45 min apart) we see each other 1-2 times a month max because of the drive. Her and my daughter are SO close and my heart is breaking because I feel like I'm taking her away from my mom.. I should add we're moving to the same town as my in-laws so I feel like I'm abandoning her for them (stupid I know) but me and my husband keep talking about the move because we are SO excited but after every conversation Im on the verge of tears because I've never made a move this big before and it's depressing me when I should be really happy about our future... How do I balance the happy and sad? Just thinking that shell miss my daughters 3rd birthday kills me. This move will put us exactly where we want to be and need to be both emotionally and financially, how do I get past this guilt?! I think some of it has to do with fighting the baby blues (4 weeks post partum) and its just getting worse! Any words of advice would help me so much... My mom is acting really happy for us and strong and that makes me feel even worse!
Thanks so much for the positive words, it's made me feel a lot better!! She's already talked about retiring there (even before we were supposed to move there) but that'll be at least 5-7 years... She's already planning a trip this summer to come see us and I know that every few months she'll make it out (my parents are really strong financially) She's already switched her credit card rewards to airline miles lol.. In reality not much will change especially if she makes it up every 2-3 months it's just scary. Especially because her and my daughter are SO close, she'll come pick her up and I'll have to call after 4 days asking when she's bringing her back LOL
Web chat. A lot. Try to plan out a trip for you to visit them, them to visit you, or something halfway. Take lots of pictures and call a lot. It will be difficult at first, but the new place will start to feel like home before you know it. Sounds like this will be a great thing for your family, so focus on that. Good luck!
We are in a similar situation, but it is only a 7 hour drive, not cross country, so we can still see each other every few months. It is hard to leave family and friends and go off to adventure somewhere new.
I recommend you all Skype each other, or video chat over Xbox 360 live or something... it will be a fun connection for all of you. Start a private family blog on blogger where you all can update pictures and stories.
Also, build a network of help once you get there. I would go ahead and start looking into infant groups, join a baby/momma yoga class, mops preschool group, things to get you and your preschooler into meeting like minded people. Support systems are so valuable, especially in new places where you are a stay at home mom.
Congrats and good luck! Focus on the positive :)
Skype every day
Can she keep your daughter while you actually move the household goods then fly out with her to the new home? My mom did this 3 times for us, military moves
Plan your trips home and save for them.
If you are making enough, plan one for her to come out to WA to see you, maybe you can pay for her airfare.
It is a huge adjustment, but doable. And it makes reunions so much sweeter.
Your daughter is only 2, she will adjust much faster than you and your husband.
What a great opportunity for you and your family! Why not start a book club with your mom? Pick titles and Skype about them. You'll have new, common ground to keep building on the great connection you already have. Why not do the same for your daughter? Choose three books from the library and email the titles to your mom to get out from her library. She can read the books to your daughter, while your daughter turns her own pages, over Skype. Letters, cards and artwork are also great things to throw in the mail. Pretty much anything can be used as a postcard - make the address clearly legible and pop a stamp on silly things you make with your daughter. Your mom will love. So much that...maybe she'll move out your way? ;D Even if that isn't going to happen, remember that the visits will be that much more rich because she will be staying with you. You'll have coffee together in the morning, share breakfast ideas, do laundry together, have her there when you grocery shop etc...those visits will top you up! Enjoy your move - what an incredible adventure!
