My 3 Year Old Hates Nap Time

Updated on March 04, 2012
T.G. asks from Aubrey, TX
11 answers

She acts like its tourture. She says its not dark outside. She takes naps at school but I guess since all her peers are taking one too it's not a problem. She needs to take naps she's not ready to get rid of them yet. If she doesnt take one she's a mess! And then will fall asleep at some point a short ride to the store etc. You can see she's exhausted with out it. Her pedi feels she needs them as well per her nightime sleep hours and behaviour without one. Ive tried to do prizes for laying down and Ive tried threatening to take away privlages (cartoons) but she still puts up such a fight. If she falls asleep in the car I try to take her out and lay her in bed and soon as she figures out what Im doing she starts having a fit. What do I do? HELP! :)

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone for the feedback. I try to prep her before naptime so she knows what's coming and she still refuses 98% of the time. I tried to tell her she doesn't have to go to bed she just has to rest and she still refused sayin she didn't want to. This week at school she napped for about 45 mins two days and not at all the third day. I'm tempted to stop her naps I'm hesitant because she's a mess when she doesn't get it and still doesn't go down early when she misses it. She's overtired at that point. So I'm not sure what to do . But I do appreciate all the feedback.

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L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Try doing a ritual of some sort so she knows what is to come and is more accepting (I know that sounds all good but then theres reality of she does not want to do it). I use to take my son on a walk, sun or snow, it helped tire him out and I would let him know what we were going to do after naptime, such as paint, color, go to the park, have snack etc.
Also try creating a palat with a mat or blankets rather than putting her to bed, letting her pick her blanket, her area, outside of the bed where she can nap so it does not seems so permanent like bedtime. Good luck...

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Graduate your big G. from nap time to rest time. When you have rest time, you don't have to sleep unless your body really wants to. You do have to keep your feet off the floor, your head on the pillow, and your voice at a whisper. You make sure not to disturb Mama or anyone else. You can rest by reading books or playing with small, quiet toys. That's how the big kids do it.

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

The more you force naps, the more she will resist. We have changed "naptime" to "rest time". My 4 y/o is allowed to play with quiet, sit-down toys in his room until a certain time, and the only thing he's allowed to come out of his room for is the bathroom. He has a lot of puzzles, books, some mazes, etc. available to him during this time. Once in a long while, he actually falls asleep, but usually, he's busy with these things for an hour or hour and a half. I try to rotate the activities so he doesn't get bored too quickly. My friend has naptime bins for her daughter, one for each day that she changes periodically. I'm not as organized!

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S.B.

answers from Redding on

I think it's time for a little reverse psychology.
My kids were not day sleepers, but they had to have quiet rest time. Every now and then, they actually would konk out, but I never made it about "sleeping".
I did daycare and had kids who thought the word NAP was the same as beating them.
I simply told them they needed to lay down, but NOT go to sleep. No sleeping involved. They just needed to rest their bones.
I had the neatest book and I wish I could find it...it was all about bones and how they grow, but it was for little kids.
Even if THEY weren't tired, their bones needed a rest and I'm serious. It worked. They would lay down and within a few minutes be sound asleep.
My kids were still for the "sleepers".
We just never used the N word and I never said they had to sleep. I just said they had to lay down and be still and quiet. No sleeping!

Just change your tactics a bit. She WILL outgrow naps, but if she's in the habit of having rest time, it just becomes second nature as she gets older and you get sick or the family just wants some rest time on the weekends, etc. No threats, no prizes, it's just what you do.

Just my opinion.

Best wishes.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

You can't force sleep, but you can enforce quiet time.
We started by reading a few stories together. I would lay down with them for a little snuggle. Then I would get up and draw the shades. They had to stay in bed, and they were allowed to look at books and play with stuffed animals, but they had to lay down, and no loud or busy toys.
If they were tired enough they would fall asleep, and if not at least they got some down time. If they didn't fall asleep I would let them get up after about 45 minutes or so. We did this routine from about the age of two and a half to almost four :)

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K.B.

answers from Detroit on

My daughter is 4.5 and doesn't do a nap every day, but there are those days that I can tell she needs one. And if I try to tell her we are going to do a nap, or even rest, in her room, she protests in a big way and flat-out refuses. But if I tell her she can rest on the couch, and no TV on, she'll often pass right out - she just lays down in her teddy bear, I cover her with the blanket, and just tell her she doesn't need to sleep, just rest. Within minutes, she's out like a light. Maybe she just needs a change of venue.

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R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Darken the room with a shade or blinds. Say "You don't have to nap, but you DO have to rest quietly in your bed until I come get you." No toys other than a few books and a lovie. Have her lie down at least an hour and more than likely she will fall asleep. My guy will be 3 next month and a couple of days a week he says he's not tired, but I enforce the "resting" and he always goes to sleep ; )

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P.S.

answers from Chicago on

my son had the same issue but at one his ped told me the same thing but by 14 months i couldnt handle it no more so i pulled naps out of his rountine and put him to bed at 630 for about two weeks it was tough but after that it was good.... hes now 3 1/2 and goes to bed at 7:30 every night and sleep untill about 8 every morning and once in a while he will fall asleep in the car but for the most part it works.... good luck and i hope you find something that works for you

kimmie

1 mom found this helpful
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M.K.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

When my 3yo doesn't want to nap I just tell her that's fine you don't have to nap but you have to stay in your room for quiet time. She almost always falls asleep within minutes. We never run errands during naptime and are always home for them and we have a strict routine when it comes to naptime. She probably has that routine at school and knows what to expect and that it's coming.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

"Rest" assured you're not alone. My son (3) does the same thing and my husband and I are exasperated. We end up scheduling errands around the time he falls asleep in the car just so he's not a big pill for the rest of the day. I don't know what to do. It's been this way for about a year now and we've done everything. Nap time ends up upsetting him SO much that the adrenaline of refusal carries him through to bedtime.

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A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

the ladies have nailed it - switch your vernacular and i bet that will do wonders. we went through the same thing around this age.

as an added bonus you can tell her that YOU need some quiet/rest time, and that if she stays in her room for X amount of time (kitchen timers are great for this, ours goes up to an hour!) maybe after errands you can stop at a park or something. good luck!

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